Fellow European who was also baffled for years until I realized the answer is money. You must pay a lot more to be “allowed” to be good enough to jump 3’.
I also grew up jumping higher on lesson horses too and they stayed sound well into their 20s just fine. We do have hugely better farriers than the US but all else is likely equal.
Some of the difference between here and Europe is the Hunters where elements of the courses vary as the height increases and mistakes are penalized. I mean, even I can jump 4’ but just as a single, only on 2 of my horses and no desire to jump a course of them. At all. I am sure my trainers and clinicians would agree with that decision from me as would my horses
It is apples and oranges. Think it is complicated by the everybody is a winner and everybody gets a prize and you can be whatever you want right away attitude more prevalent on this side of the pond.
IMO no discussion past the word no from the horse’s owner is needed in this situation.
Where I am located (and in the surrounding area), there are no school horses that jump more than cross rails. So the students don’t really know how to jump and have to lease a horse to learn how. The horse can cover for the rider up to 2’3. At 2’6, the horse can usually do it. At 2’9, if the horse is under powered (or just chill -like mine) and/or the rider gets a terrible distance (extreme chip or very long) the horse and rider can crash.
Many years ago a rider in my group lesson asked when we would jump higher. The trainer set a single ground pole on the ground and said, when everyone can get over the pole correctly. The number of chips or long spots was humbling and trainer then explained what would happen if jumps were higher - harm to horse and rider.
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