Ok - I’ve decided to be a Big Girl and buy a real stock tie - the one you have to tie around your neck yourself. But which? And why do they come in sizes?
Mind you, I don’t own an iron, so something that needs to be dealt with after washing is probably not a good idea, either…
Generally a slightly wider, shaped collar and a longer overall stock tie gives a better look. Sorry, but a proper stock tie is generally cotton and should be laundered and ironed/starched to look its best when tied. If you don’t own an iron, I wonder if you could send it to the dry cleaners to have it professionally laundered? The good news is that “real” stock ties are really quite easy to tie.
I haven’t actually ever ironed it, but I do take it out of the washer right away and hang it to dry and it’s always been fine. I think mine is a large-- you definitely don’t want it to be too short.
Since I am a foxhunter, I use, and recommend, a proper 4-fold stock tie, such as this: http://www.horsecountrycarrot.com/index.cfm?action=store&sub=product&prod=279&cat=173. Most of mine are vintage silk stocks, but the cotton ones work just as well. 4-fold stocks look better and lay better then other types, IMO. Yes, they should be ironed and starched. I personally hate shaped stockties.
Sidesaddle, I’m all for the four fold stock ties–they are lovely and I also prefer them for hunting. But I wouldn’t recommend them for the hunter ring, and probably also not for a person that doesn’t own an iron.
What does “four fold” mean? Is it the number of times the fabric is folded over to make the stock? I’m picturing a square of fabric that is folded until you get the long piece to tie the stock with, but can’t tell if I’m on the right track just by looking at that picture.
OP - I have a shaped Essex stock tie and am very happy with it. I don’t iron mine after washing, but just lay it flat to dry. Definitely buy a longer one versus a shorter one. You can always tuck the ends up or into your breeches if they’re longer than you need, but you can’t lengthen a stubby tie that wants to pop out of your vest and shad! 
Oh. My. Goodness.
If ironing and a little starching is too daunting for you, perhaps you could take up soccer?
Part of being a Grown Up “Big Girl” is making sure that one’s clothing is nicely pressed and free of wrinkles. I have sent employees home for coming in with clothing that was obviously either just taken out of the dryer after sitting in it all night or possibly slept in. “But I don’t have an iron” in tantamount to saying “I don’t have toilet tissue or deoderant”. It is something that an adult needs. If you have a bottle opener and wine glasses, but not an iron, you have your priorties wrong. An iron, at Walmart or somewhere similar, is about $14.00. A bottle of water is about 99cents. The electricity is minimal. A can of starch is $2.99 but lasts a long time (it would likely last you into the next decade ) It takes about 5 minutes to iron a stock tie, even a four fold one (don’t buy one of those… yet) and hang it on a hanger. Get the longest one possible as you can pin the ends to your shirt and it will stay neatly tucked in your jacket. Anyone that says they are too difficult to tie should likely not be trusted to drive a car, or be anywhere that they might be a danger to themselves or others. It’s easier to tie a stock tie than to tie your shoes. Really. For a horse show, it is easier to deal with a stock tie that has the “slit” in it, to pass back through so you don’t have as many layers around your neck, which, since it’s new to you, you may find uncomfortable. If you were truly out hunting, you wouldn’t mind a bit, you’d wish for flannel or wool. Many of the stock ties are more modern blended fabrics, but if you want really proper ones, you’ll get one from some place like “Horse Country” (they have an online catalog as well) and starch the bejesus out of it and wear it as it is intended to be worn. Most people look lovely in them, and it’s a very traditional polished look. They come in white or ivory, so depending on your complexion, you choose what looks nicest with your coloring or your horse. They come either plain or patterned.
And once you find out you like them, they come in colors with lovely patterns. I probably have 15 of them
[QUOTE=BeeHoney;8282842]
Sidesaddle, I’m all for the four fold stock ties–they are lovely…But I wouldn’t recommend them for the hunter ring…[/QUOTE]
May I ask why? I have used mine for classics many a time, with my shadbelly with hunt colors and a proper vest, not points.
[QUOTE=2ndyrgal;8283940]
Part of being a Grown Up “Big Girl” is making sure that one’s clothing is nicely pressed and free of wrinkles. I have sent employees home for coming in with clothing that was obviously either just taken out of the dryer after sitting in it all night or possibly slept in.[/QUOTE]
Part of being a real grownup is having the luxury of deciding that ironing is a waste of time and buying one’s wardrobe accordingly. It’s been about 30 years now since I left my last iron, and I haven’t been sent home from work once.
I suppose I could always pay someone to properly iron and starch a stock tie, if that is truly necessary.
Not sure I’ve ever seen an obviously colored stock tie in the Hunters - do people do that?
Thanks for all the replies, in any event.
paw, I would say that the vast majority of the stock ties you see in the hunter ring are white, with the occasional ivory stock. I really can’t remember seeing a coloured one, ever, in recent times.
PS: Kudos to you for the very diplomatic reply above. 
[QUOTE=SidesaddleRider;8284018]
May I ask why? I have used mine for classics many a time, with my shadbelly with hunt colors and a proper vest, not points.[/QUOTE]
I really haven’t seen too many four folds in the hunter ring. I’m definitely not saying a four fold would be wrong, because I agree that they tie up nicely. My reasons are this: Most horse shows are in hot weather and four fold stock ties are thicker and hotter. Most horse show people don’t wear stock ties all the time and are more like, “Hmm, how do I tie this thing?” and frankly, a shaped stock tie is easier to handle and figure out (I think). Also, horse show people are often on the road. A shaped stock tie is easier to deal with laundry wise, you don’t have to get it all folded up correctly before you even tie it. A shaped stock tie is simple, correct, easy to deal with and easy to make look good.
I both hunt and show in the hunters, and I have long ago accepted that the hunt field and the hunter ring have nothing in common and I don’t attempt much crossover where clothing/style is concerned. While I think your outfit for classics sounds lovely, there are plenty of shows where you would pass out from heat exhaustion if you attempted that. A thin summer shadbelly with points is way cooler than a wool shadbelly designed for the hunt field combined with a wool vest.
[QUOTE=paw;8284037]
Part of being a real grownup is having the luxury of deciding that ironing is a waste of time and buying one’s wardrobe accordingly. It’s been about 30 years now since I left my last iron, and I haven’t been sent home from work once.
I suppose I could always pay someone to properly iron and starch a stock tie, if that is truly necessary.
Not sure I’ve ever seen an obviously colored stock tie in the Hunters - do people do that?
Thanks for all the replies, in any event.[/QUOTE]
paw, if it makes you feel any better, I do own an iron and a can of starch, but stock ties are the ONLY thing I iron. Ever.
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