Am I a b***** for not feeding a client/boarder's horse their supplements?

[Lusoluv]

I’ll try to keep this short. I freelance teach at some barns, including where I board. Our barn is closed Mondays, but I have permission from the BO to ride my horse, lunge, whatever in trade for helping out. Other boarders know and are cool with this.

We have a big locker full of boarder’s supplements. These aren’t fed on Mondays since it’s a skeleton crew to clean/turnout/feed. But I have done favors giving oral ulcer meds, bute tabs, SMZs, etc. to fellow boarders’ horses who were on temporary, but necessary medical dosing regimes. I’ve done this for Client X for the last 8 Mondays. Meds are done. Today she asks me if I’ll keep doing her regular supps since I’m there anyway. I don’t know why, but this rankled me! Her horse isn’t even in the same barn as mine and again, supps aren’t medically needed. Mondays are my day to do my thing and not be stopped and asked for free training advice, or look at Dobbin’s leg, or anything else for that matter. This boarder has also asked me to switch out her horse’s sheets/blankets a couple times, and I did Again, I’m HAPPY to help with meds or necessary favors, but this is a large facility with 4 barns. As soon as I replied, I felt guilty and wonder what she’s saying about me…

[Texarkana]

You’ve done nothing wrong! You are not their groom. She is overstepping your generosity.

Though, I do find it odd the barn doesn’t feed supplements on Monday. I would be really irritated by that policy, no matter how busy they are. Granted, like 90% of supplements just make expensive pee so the owners can feel warm and fuzzy. But there are some that are really important! Where do you draw the line between “supplement” and “medication?” For example, something like electrolytes, anhidrosis supplements, hind gut ulcer supplements, etc. may not be Rx but can be pretty important! And OMG, if something like antibiotics aren’t given, that can have serious implications not just for the horse but for antibiotic resistance on the whole. Not to mention every time you hard stop omeprazole, you are setting the horse up for a big acid spike.

But that’s above your pay grade as a freelance instructor and boarder!

[173north]

Nah, you’re fine. Imagine how many favors you’d be asked for if word got out you were feeding, changing sheets etc on Monday? For free!?? Good to set the boundary now.

[sophie]

You shouldn’t be asked for this kind of “favors”. You’ve done nothing wrong.

But yes, the fact that no supplements are given with the horses’ feed on Mondays just doesn’t make sense to me and I would NOT be happy with that rule. I boarded once (and not for long!) at a barn that was closed to boarders on Mondays, horses not turned out…and it just felt wrong.

[Long_Time_Lurker]

Giving supplements is part of feeding. The barn staff should be doing this, not you (unless it is part of your helping out on Mondays). Its not OK to just skip routine care like supplements or blanket changes once a week, ESPECIALLY on days boarders are not allowed to come out to do it themselves. You have been put in a bad position by the barn owner to be the only one allowed to come out if they are refusing to give routing care for their boarders on Mondays.

[CindyCRNA]

As an owner, I would make a trip out if it was that important to me. I would not ask anyone that is not employed by the barn to do it.

[Long_Time_Lurker]

@CindyCRNA

As an owner, I would make a trip out if it was that important to me. I would not ask anyone that is not employed by the barn to do it.

I am assuming that when the OP says the barn is “closed” on Mondays that means the boarders are not allowed to come out. If I’m wrong, then yes I as an owner would come out myself. I know of a few barns that are “closed on Mondays” and I would really hesitate to board at a barn where I was not welcome any day during reasonable hours.

[endlessclimb]

You did nothing wrong, OP. But if they’re going to skeleton crew, they should do it on a day where the boarders themselves can make up the difference. My Old Man gets his Equioxx with his AM supplements, skipping that would not fly with me.

[Impractical_Horsewoman]

It sounds like the client should take this up with the barn, not you! It’s a responsibility, and TBH, even if you’re totally competent, giving medications, supplements, and changing blankets still has a small “risk/obligation” if you forget, or even if you have to say, stick around until it’s feeding time to make sure the horses get what they need, or find the right blanket and so forth. Having a skeleton crew, not providing basic care like swapping a blanket or putting meds and supplements in feed, and not letting boarders come in to do the work is a problem for a full-service barn. It’s not like horses aren’t horses on Monday.

[hoopoe]

that would be a hard stop no. How many times have we discussed how some riders feel used by their barn because favors dont seem to be reciprocated or they feel taken advantage in other ways.

As soon as someone else finds out you are doing a favor for one person, they are going to start requesting favors, too.

I too find it very odd that the feeding staff of the barn cannot be empowered to give supplements . I would feel very uneasy if my horse was on some program where daily dosing is needed and the barn owner / manager made a judgement call that it was not really a needed “medication”

[B_and_B]

Agree with everyone else. You are NOT a problem for not feeding a supplement as a ‘favor’. BUT, the barn’s policy? Definitely not a good one. I have a horse that does react remarkably poorly fs a supplement is stopped. You wouldn’t think a little scoop of magnesium would make a difference…but for a draft horse with controlled PSSM? Oh my it does.

[NaturallyHappy]

I’d have a very hard time keeping my horse at a farm that was closed on Mondays and wouldn’t feed supplements. I’d wonder what else they don’t do if no one is looking.

[4Frogs_aLilypad]

@Lusoluv

This boarder has also asked me to switch out her horse’s sheets/blankets a couple times, and I did Again, I’m HAPPY to help with meds or necessary favors, but this is a large facility with 4 barns. As soon as I replied, I felt guilty and wonder what she’s saying about me…

Cut her off. I was in a similar situation and the boarder slowly started upping the “asks”. To be clear, I was not there to take care of her horse, but a specific barn full of others. I would get texts from her requesting blanket changes and feed adjustments. Say no, and don’t feel guilty about setting healthy boundaries. I don’t know why this is such a thing many of us struggle with, but it’s ok to say no, and you don’t have to be apologetic about it. She’s taking advantage of you.

[Willesdon]

@Lusoluv

… This boarder has also asked me to switch out her horse’s sheets/blankets a couple times, and I did Again, I’m HAPPY to help with meds or necessary favors, but this is a large facility with 4 barns. As soon as I replied, I felt guilty and wonder what she’s saying about me…

Not your horse, not your responsibility: her horse, her responsibility. You set reasonable boundaries and you really shouldn’t worry about what she says about you.

[Lusoluv]

Thanks for everyone’s replies. I feel better knowing objective opinions concur with me that it’s OK to say “no” sometimes! Guess I’d be curious if she posted the story from her side, how it would be framed. In any event, I won’t lose anymore sleep over the matter. As far as the care at this barn, I have no control over it. We all make compromises based on needs, costs, etc. It works for me - for now. Thank you!

[tabula_rashah]

No you definitely shouldn’t have to be on the hook for feeding other people’s horse their supplements. But that is pretty craptastic of the barn to be like oh we’re lazy on Mondays, here’s your sub-par care

[Angela_Freda]

Agree, that my “minimal care” would include supplements, turnout including boots and sheets as required, etc.

[eurofoal]

When I ask for help, I expect to pay for it. There’s a lady at my barn that does add on type care, she’s $10-15 a day depending on what you need done. I figure by the time I get in my car and drive over to the barn, the time and gas make ten bucks a real bargain.

[Lusoluv]

Well, I am happy to help out when it’s needed. I know what it’s like to live inconveniently far from the barn, so a simple task like dropping meds into a feed bucket or even administering paste is well within my skillset. There will be a day when I can ask a person for a favor that I’ve helped, so it can be reciprocal, otherwise I think of it as Paying It Forward. Client X won’t reciprocate, and from what I’ve observed, I don’t think I trust her to return a favor, that’s why I was floored that she asked me to continue feeding her horse his vitamin/flax/bran supps “since I’m there anyway”. Anyhoo, I saw her today and she was polite, so no harm done. Now that she doesn’t have me anymore, she did ask her groom to do this Mondays and she’ll tip him on her monthly bill.

[js]

@Lusoluv

This boarder has also asked me to switch out her horse’s sheets/blankets a couple times, and I did Again, I’m HAPPY to help with meds or necessary favors, but this is a large facility with 4 barns

No you’re not but by doing favors in the past for this person, you set yourself up. You are right to say no but the boarder wasn’t out of line for asking either since you helped out other times. Best to not put yourself in the position in the first place or make it clear that you are only helping this time but can’t be expected to in the future. Follow the barn rules, if no meds or supplements are given on Monday’s then that’s how it is.

Glad she wasn’t upset with you.