OK, bone chips and teeth.
Who has the jar of pus from the abscess on their desk?…. Where the souvenir must be because (dammit), Youtube took the gross video down?
I’d come to your office. Anyone who could mix pus and white collar business… we’d get along fine.
OK, bone chips and teeth.
Who has the jar of pus from the abscess on their desk?…. Where the souvenir must be because (dammit), Youtube took the gross video down?
I’d come to your office. Anyone who could mix pus and white collar business… we’d get along fine.
[QUOTE=mvp;7702336]
OK, bone chips and teeth.
Who has the jar of pus from the abscess on their desk?…. Where the souvenir must be because (dammit), Youtube took the gross video down?
.[/QUOTE]
I’m not easily grossed out, but a jar full of pus would do it because it’s not interesting, but just gross! Although if it was a really large amount of pus from one abscess, that might be interesting enough! 
Well what about a small stool sample? You know… aromatherapy?
OP, your coworker reminds me of a person I once knew.
They very much wanted to fit in, but holy crap they really lacked the social skills to do it with any grace. They would insert themselves into any conversation, no matter how apparently private it was, and attempt to relate to the conversation by bringing up something about themselves that was at best related but typically tangential and only related in the sense that the story she was about to tell also involved people.
It is annoying as all get out, and I definitely didn’t look forward to those awkward times when I was having a specific conversation with someone that was a somewhat sensitive (but not altogether private) topic, and she would butt in. But I don’t have the heart to break it to her that she is doing something socially awkward, nor do I have the time to invest in helping her change her ways.
So mostly I try to engage with her on topics she wants to talk about, not bring up anything about me so I avoid the inevitable feelings of slightly murderous annoyance, and set limits on the interactions so I’m not trapped there too long.
It’s worked well, I think.
I have the keratoma that was removed from my mare’s foot and the mesquite thorn she stepped on that caused major problems! There are almost 800 photos on my phone and 85% of them are Lady, including the hole drilled in her hoof to remove the keratoma!
But - back to the thread - I’m that person too. I LOVE all things horses, especially my own 
and will happily talk to anyone who shows the slightest interest Definitely not a DQ, I tell people “I take riding lessons in a dressage saddle” :lol:
Just my $.02 but this sounds like a case of the pot calling the kettle black.
The ultimate first world problem 
[QUOTE=Countrywood;7702493]
The ultimate first world problem [/QUOTE]
An interpersonal difficulty is the ultimate first world problem?
The OP never tried to compare her frustration to, say, surviving genocide and starvation. Did she perhaps come off as unreasonable in her initial post? Yes. Did her second post clarify this coworker butted into a conversation, hijacked it, and left her with a poor taste in her mouth? Yes. And is that a reasonable frustration (ignoring the fact she kind of attributed this trait to the person doing dressage and came on a section of the bb devoted to dressage)? Yes, yes it is reasonable to be put off by that kind of interaction.
The idea of people minimizing the problems of others by saying negating it with the response “first world problems” does not address the part that this is in fact an area that causes some difficulty. So long as someone doesn’t suggest that the extra foam on their latte or an annoying coworker IS more difficult than crises faced by under- or un-developed nations, I say complain away.
/rant
good point, bulletin boards are a legit place to vent!
[QUOTE=JBD;7697391]
I may be wrong but I’ve seen (heard) more assumption of superiority from dressage wanna-bes than I ever heard in other disciplines. [/QUOTE]
There’s a large USEF rated saddlebred show in my area each year. The show organizers are longtime friends of mine, so sometimes I go to one of the social events during the show. One year I invited a dressage friend to go with me, so she could see what a nice job this group does for the show, and perhaps we could do something similar for our local dressage shows.
At the cocktail party, my friend ran into someone she knew outside of horses. He’s a saddlebred trainer, and they had a nice talk about non-horse business.
The trainer’s wife also joined the conversation. When my friend said she rode dressage, the wife picked a fight with her about how awful the discipline is, and berated her about choosing to ride and show dressage. My friend hung in there for a while, but then walked away.
Until then, I’d never heard of horse people berate another in a social setting about their chosen disciplines. We each have our opinions, and obviously choose to ride what suits us.
Imagine if the wife had said “Oh you ride dressage ! Welcome to our saddlebred show. We hope you enjoy it.”
Can you just give your co-worker a break ? She’s not out to steal your horse, your tack, or make life miserable for you. She just wants to talk horses.
JBD–I think you’re perfectly right in your paranoia about dressage “people”. I’m one of them. But I recently relocated to an evening barn with great trainers and my world is so much better. I do find a maximum of superior attitude in the dressage world, often combined with a huge variety of competance. They are also much more clique-y. My fellow eventing boarders are so much more relaxed about their horses and friendlier. And their horses stay sound and are fitter. They are a constant inspiration in that their horses go freely forward–all of them, all of the time. And I love being teased that my horse isn’t fat–he’s just “dressage fat”.
I’m enjoying the irony of complaining on an online forum about having to converse about horses with another horse person in real life, when some of us probably come to the forum because there isn’t enough conversation about horses with other people in real life.
[QUOTE=GoneAway;7705585]
I’m enjoying the irony of complaining on an online forum about having to converse about horses with another horse person in real life, when some of us probably come to the forum because there isn’t enough conversation about horses with other people in real life.[/QUOTE]
Yes, that exactly. I have a feeling that at all my old jobs, I was that annoying “horse” person. I would have died and gone to heaven if there was a horse person in the office!
I don’t think the issue with the coworker really has anything to do with the dressage. I think she is just self-absorbed. I wouldn’t let that stop you from joining a barn with dressage riders and trainers.
I would just keep my attention on . . . work? That’s what you’re there to do, and someone’s paying you to do, after all. Should you run into Annoyin’DQ at the water cooler and she starts gushing, just smile politely and nod, look as bored as possible, say “That’s nice” condescendingly and excuse yourself to get back to your station.
Most of us learned this in the lunch room by 3rd Grade . . . :rolleyes:
[QUOTE=Mardi;7704024]
The trainer’s wife also joined the conversation. When my friend said she rode dressage, the wife picked a fight with her about how awful the discipline is, and berated her about choosing to ride and show dressage. My friend hung in there for a while, but then walked away.[/QUOTE]
I was at some parental party once and was introduced to one of my parents’ friends, who had some peripheral relationship to the horse world such as her daughter rode or someone she knew did or whatever. She asked me what type of riding do I do, so I said, “I do the hunters and dressage.”
She replied, “Oh, dressage, isn’t that where they, you know, [various violent cranking gestures]?”
Me: “Yep! That’s precisely it.”
[QUOTE=Lady Eboshi;7707352]
I would just keep my attention on . . . work? That’s what you’re there to do, and someone’s paying you to do, after all. Should you run into Annoyin’DQ at the water cooler and she starts gushing, just smile politely and nod, look as bored as possible, say “That’s nice” condescendingly and excuse yourself to get back to your station.
Most of us learned this in the lunch room by 3rd Grade . . . :rolleyes:[/QUOTE]
Ummmm…not really. Most of us are not this rude. I have never treated anyone in my office as you describe. Yikes.
Raising a stunned eyebrow here. Glad I don’t work with you!
Love discussing how to improve my dressage skills. Dressage riders are the most purest of riders as their discipline involves every step the horse takes.
From your comments I’d guess that you won’t enjoy dressage that much, so why are you considering specialising?
[QUOTE=Lady Eboshi;7707352]
I would just keep my attention on . . . work? That’s what you’re there to do, and someone’s paying you to do, after all. Should you run into Annoyin’DQ at the water cooler and she starts gushing, just smile politely and nod, look as bored as possible, say “That’s nice” condescendingly and excuse yourself to get back to your station.
Most of us learned this in the lunch room by 3rd Grade . . . :rolleyes:[/QUOTE]
Yes but most of the rest of us also proceeded to junior high, highschool, and then adulthood and developed our interpersonal skills, you know, accordingly.
Maybe it’s a regional thing; around here it’s what most people do at parties to repel BORES. The horse subject is irrelevant; if you don’t want to spend your time with a person you have no interest in talking your ears off (on company time), make it clear to them that you’re really not into it. Major rudeness not required.
BTW, only on COTH have I ever encountered a group of women who are so hamstrung by “feelings”–theirs and everyone else’s. I seldom encounter anyone who obsesses over that in real life; most people simply don’t have the time, aren’t aware, or don’t give it much thought.
Office Bore = Dismissed! The rest is drama mongering.
[QUOTE=Lady Eboshi;7707955]
Maybe it’s a regional thing; around here it’s what most people do at parties to repel BORES. The horse subject is irrelevant; if you don’t want to spend your time with a person you have no interest in talking your ears off (on company time), make it clear to them that you’re really not into it. Major rudeness not required.
BTW, only on COTH have I ever encountered a group of women who are so hamstrung by “feelings”–theirs and everyone else’s. I seldom encounter anyone who obsesses over that in real life; most people simply don’t have the time, aren’t aware, or don’t give it much thought.
Office Bore = Dismissed! The rest is drama mongering.[/QUOTE]
Considering that I went to 3rd grade right in your neck of the woods, I don’t think it is a regional thing.
The fact that you are still espousing the clicquish “dismissal” of other people does not speak well for your ability to get past.a third grade level of social behavior.
By submitting your email, you agree to our Terms of Service and Privacy Policy. You may also receive promotional emails from The Chronicle of the Horse. You can opt out at any time.
For Customers
Company
Terms of Use
