I am looking for opinions on a somewhat complicated situation with my horse.
I’ll preface by saying that he is sound and will stay with me for life. The worst case scenario here is he just gets an early retirement.
I am stuck and burned out with my horse. 8yo OTTB I bought as a restarted 5yo. When I first bought him, he was pretty quiet for TB standards and very sweet. Sometimes spooky/quick under saddle but very manageable, great ground manners, and good curiosity which allowed me pretty quickly desensitize him to everything.
He has had multiple, unrelated, serious injuries since I purchased him - the true definition of accident prone. Some injuries required lots of diagnostics. Two required surgery. He recovered 100% (clean ultrasound, x-ray, flexions, bloodwork, scope) from everything except his latest surgery, which was for kissing spine. The kissing spine was caught as he recovered from his last injury, and ultimately no treatments were able to keep him comfortable so we did the bone shave.
Since that surgery, I’ve worked with a physio to make a plan to slowly bring him back to work. Lots of in hand work and stretching. About 2-3 months into the rehab, he became extremely unpredictable/nasty on the ground - bolting, rearing, striking out, bucking, often completely unprovoked. He was treated for ulcers but this behavior started around the time he scoped clear. Vet couldn’t find any physical source of pain, chalked it up to cold weather (this was December) and him being bored of all the in hand work/walking. The vet and physio agreed his muscle development and posture was drastically improving, so he was working correctly during this time. No back pain detected.
I started positive reinforcement training to help rebuild trust and keep things more engaging for him. It worked until it didn’t, and I had to revert to protected contact only and basically couldn’t continue his rehab. I sent him to a highly recommended rehab facility to further his rehab because I couldn’t handle him anymore. They were able to keep him in work, but needed to drug the CRAP out of him to make it happen - all under my vet’s supervision.
Winter ends, and after a couple months at the rehab facility I get him back looking by and large the same as when I dropped him off - no loss in muscle but no major improvement. I am able to continue his rehab for a while longer. The meltdowns don’t go away but they are rarer and I’m able to work through them much better.
When I was close to getting back on, he then got a 1-2 month vacation because of my own personal circumstances. When I got him back into work, I opted to take a step back in his rehab to ensure I didn’t overface him. Correct work in the walk, mobility, core strengthening, and lots of positive reinforcement to keep things interesting. I “restarted” him two months ago and I can tell he is slipping backwards, again. He started to have unprovoked meltdowns in trot in hand, so I brought him back to walk work. The meltdowns have gotten steadily worse.
This week, he had an absolute meltdown out of nowhere just walking back to the barn from his field. He’s been so inconsistent that he’s regressing in his rehab again. I haven’t sat on him in a year and at this point I don’t think I ever will again.
I’ve tried giving him more work, less work, turning him out with more friends, by himself, bigger stall, stall outside, changing facilities to somewhere more quiet, letting him run in the indoor by himself to “let it out”, longer warmups, and tons of R+. He’s out 12-15 hours/day, can’t handle longer. He gets all you can eat grass hay in stall and turnout (grass isn’t great where I am), grain, and a gut supplement. I had him on calming supplements but they didn’t do anything so I stopped them. When this behavior started, we did some testing and turned up empty handed so I’ve been trying to just slowly work through it.
Every “trainer” I’ve tried to have help me has either drugged him, attempted to exhaust him, or man handled him into submission. The R+ I have done has been by far the most effective with him but when he’s truly melting down it does nothing. I literally cannot bring myself to spend more money on diagnostics for this horse, but I feel just utterly defeated by the circumstances. I could have imported a warmblood with how much I have spent in vet bills, not to mention how much time I have spent slowly bringing him back from his various ailments.
Posting partially to vent, partially to see if anyone has been in a similar situation/has thoughts. What would you do in my situation?