Boarding Woes/VENT

[beowulf]

We must have been at the same barn…

In that vein, you mention chainsaws and upthread I know I saw conversations about courtesy and machines:

A few summers ago I took a green horse to his first XC schooling at a big venue. We had just started warming up when a large loader and tractor outfitted with a chainsaw appeared right in the middle of the field where the most jumps were. My horse was okay with the tractor and loader, but not the chainsaw and the noises of tree limbs falling.

While I used it as an “exposure” opportunity, we really didn’t get to jump since all the baby fences were right where the loader/tractor was. I was disappointed in this venue for that decision, considering we had to book a time weeks in advance.

Happy to say that the baby horse is now an adult that is very worldly about chainsaws… we even had one going off in one of our lessons last year. But still! Sometimes people don’t think.

[mvp]

@S1969

@mvp

OMG, but IME rubber-bendy rules seem to be endemic to boarding. As is ‘different prices for different people’. Horse boarding does not seem to be a place that one goes looking for justice or consistency. IME, it has not ended well when I asked why so-n-so got X and I got Y.

That’s everywhere.

It’s unreasonable to expect the barn owner/manager to be a 24/7 nazi policing every boarder to see what rules they are breaking and giving them an ultimatum. They have other work to do, and are likely to tolerate rule bending to a certain degree, just like all other managers. I don’t fire my employees when they come in late. I come in late sometimes, too.

And, it’s also totally acceptable for BO/BMs and managers in all fields to allow for some rule bending when it suits them. So, no dogs except the ones that live there. Oh, and maybe also except for someone else who has good dogs and for whatever reason, the BO allows it. (Maybe one of their employees, someone who has boarded a long time, or someone that needs a favor.)

If the dogs in question are a problem, then someone needs to make a complaint and ask the BM to remedy the situation because there is a reason to do so. If they are just annoyed because the rules are being broken, that’s different. And really, none of their business - unless it is causing a problem. The problem can’t be - “yeah, but the rules say…” that’s just being a whiner.

I don’t like loose dogs in a barn setting, but generally speaking, most horses are not really bothered by them unless they are chasing. I took lessons at a barn where the owners huge, hairy dogs would get in the water troughs, roll in the arena and then rub mud on people. I just found it annoying. I don’t think a complaint would have been warranted though. Other than my dirty clothes, there really wasn’t a problem.

You just made my point: BOs can do what they want. Rules can be applied to all of the people all of the time, some of the people all of the time, some of the people some of the time, none of the people… you get my point.

And they also get to set prices the way they want.

I’m not arguing that this isn’t possible.

[CindyCRNA]

You’re the only one who thinks the OP is a difficult boarder. Good lord.

[CindyCRNA]

Ok I am that owner who doesn’t want their horse to stand in the pouring rain. A sprinkle here and there ok but not constant rain.

[Obsidian_Fire]

@mvp

Rules can be applied to all of the people all of the time, some of the people all of the time, some of the people some of the time, none of the people… you get my point.

I once boarded at a barn like this. The BO liked stirring up the drama. One day I’d had enough, had a place to land, packed my stuff and walked out.
Too bad because otherwise it was a nice place. But why even post rules if you aren’t going to enforce any of them?

[fordtraktor]

I think your concerns are very valid, and hopefully you will find a barn that works for you. My barn is mostly nervous ammies (including me!) who want to enjoy our horses in peace. While we do have a few kids in the lesson program, it is geared toward adults. My own kids aren’t around the barn much at all. Frankly I don’t like kids that much (besides my own) and I certainly don’t want to run the equine version of a daycare. The skateboard thing is crazy, and while I don’t specifically have a no skateboards rule (because why would I in a horse barn!? It isn’t a skate park!) I would certainly implement one if I needed to! Desensitization is fine and dandy, but we have a barn full of expensive dressage horses and we don’t need them to get hurt to prove a point, just because. If you could get past my beagle sleeping in whatever sunny spot she can find, you certainly don’t sound like a difficult boarder to me. Best of luck.

[fordtraktor]

That is totally fine! Not a good fit then, choose another barn! I am totally fine with that, no hard feelings…but that isn’t my program.

Besides, they stand in the rain only if they choose to do so…they have sheds with hay. They don’t melt! Even my barn has runs on the stalls…they can, and do, stand in the rain “in” too.

[fordtraktor]

Another thought about this…I think my main complaint is people who come to a barn knowing what the program is, how it is run, and then coming and expecting the program to change based on their preferences—and complaining when it runs like they were told it would. It’s like selling someone Product A, then having them complain to all and sundry because it isn’t Product B. Well no, it’s Product A!

[SpicyPRE]

Thank you! I suspect you and I would co-exist in a barn very peacefully!

[CindyCRNA]

Ok, you are correct. I will give you that. Your barn, your rules.

[CHT]

I didn’t read all the replies because some were really getting to me, but OP, do you have a trailer? Can you trailer out for lessons? I don’t allow random outside coaches here, but I have clients that haul out for lessons (they event, I don’t). Might be a compromise if you can find a barn that doesn’t force you to pay for lessons/training?

[EventingMaff]

I have found it interesting that the concept of a “professional boarding barn” does seem much less prevalent in the US versus other places. There are “professional barns” – but as OP says, they typically have an in-house trainer and the expectation of being in that program with that trainer.

When I was in NL and Belgium, I did not find it all that difficult to find professional boarding barns. Prices were transparent and public, services available were made very clear, there was no “tailoring” or favors. Barns may have had communities develop within their boarders but they did not serve as a community (if that distinction makes sense). Both countries also tended to be MUCH more rule abiding in general as a culture. If the barn rule was dogs were leashed within the barn but could be off-leash in fields / open areas of the property - that tended to be respected religiously and by everybody. If someone does not adhere, they get a message (or in person conversation if convenient) that reminds them of the rules and asks that they respect it.

Here in the US I have been fortunate to have generally positive boarding experiences, but it’s MUCH more of a relationship-driven, ad-hoc cases treated at the discretion of the BO / BM. I tend to see high frequency of the “unleashed dog” scenario either a) going un-addressed or implicitly approved by BO / BM because that person is a friend / special exception OR b) BO / BM may be disgruntled by it, boarders may vent about it to one another, but nobody actually brings it forward to the transgressor in a professional and simple manner. There’s clique-y politics without just simple professional / business-like confrontation about it.

This isn’t true for ALL boarding-only barns (i.e. no program - I can’t speak to barns with strict programs as I’ve never used one) in the US nor is EVERY barn in BE / NL a perfect image of professional behavior. But in my experience that seems to be an on-average difference.

[Jealoushe]

Even on my own farm, it is a given that you tell people you are riding so they don’t suddenly start the wood chipper, chain saw, take apart engines etc. It’s common courtesy and safety. My horses are not spooky at all, but safety first, always. No need to cause accidents for no reason.

[MsM]

I was reminded today that I dont need kids on skateboards or clowns juggling chainsaws to have a problematic reaction from my horse! He is basically sensible, but does have a strong startle reflex.

Today was Revenge Of The Turkeys!

The open back door of the indoor looks into some brush and woods. Just as we were by the door a flock of 6 or so turkeys bustled out of the bushes and into the clearing. It seems we have not mastered “spook in place” and my back is sore from the sudden change in direction and acceleration.

[sascha]

Ouch.

My “Hey kid lemme try yer hoverboard” horse used to be completely batshit about everything. Used to have to get turned out if hay was being loaded into the loft, etc. Totally fine about all manner of nonsense real and imagined now.

Anyway, recently, for a couple of weeks there were some kid’s toys just outside the outdoor arena. I kept waiting for my horse to take the opportunity to give herself a hit of adrenaline due to toys shining in the sun/lights. Nope. Nada. The warm, lovely evening the toys finally disappeared, otoh, “OMG some monster clearly ate those toys! We are all in mortal danger!”

Then there are squirrels. Bunnies, deer, coyote, turkeys, turkey hunters(!) are all ok. Squirrels may or may not cause all 4 feet to leave the ground at once followed by me, “It’s a squirrel, ffs. Do you fell foolish? You should feel foolish. I know damn well you’d probably trot right up to a bear.”

[sascha]

@CindyCRNA

You’re the only one who thinks the OP is a difficult boarder. Good lord.

No.

And the other part of that is wanting to mould a facility/owner to meet one’s needs. OP may be very nice and not difficult at all in a barn that meets their needs out of the box. And from the sounds of past experiences that is exactly what they need and with good reason!

However, attempting to change a facility to meet their needs can make them difficult.

[sascha]

@SpicyPRE

When looking for a new barn, I dont share my background, however I do want to have an honest, direct conversation with the BO about their facility. Its not good for me or my horse to be in a facility that doesnt work for either of us.

If I were you, unless I were desperate for a stall, I’d share my needs completely. That way you are going into a situation where the BO completely understands and is either on board or says, no actually, there are occasional loose children/weed whackers/crazy trainers so we’re not a good fit for you.

Otherwise you may find yourself in a place that talks all the talk and walks none of the walk and ends up with you right where you are now but in slightly different geography.

If you want a BO to be open and truthful, give them the same respect you expect from them. Your needs are totally legitimate, but they’re not necessarily going to be met unless the BO knows about them.

[endlessclimb]

Well… it’s not about what I think. She admitted it in the OP. Case closed…

[BigMama1]

@fordtraktor

Another thought about this…I think my main complaint is people who come to a barn knowing what the program is, how it is run, and then coming and expecting the program to change based on their preferences—and complaining when it runs like they were told it would. It’s like selling someone Product A, then having them complain to all and sundry because it isn’t Product B. Well no, it’s Product A!

100% agree. Luckily we’ve had very few people like that at the barn where I board and none of them stayed long. Some people just hate having rules. Other people are so dumb you can’t believe the rules you need. Like who would imagine you’d need a specific “no skateboarding in the barn” rule? Or in the case of one memorable boarder I once knew a “No riding on the BO’s front lawn” rule or “when you hand graze your horse it must have a lead line attached and you must be holding it” rule. Never underestimate the stupidity of people.

However the OP’s situation sounds like the opposite: She was told the barn was Product A and chose it because it was product A. After moving in she discovers it’s actually Product B, which she was specifically trying to avoid.

[SpicyPRE]

YES!!! Thanks @BigMama1 you get it!