This seems to be a repeating fear in Equestrian, that long term relationships of this sort that started when one partner was a young student of the other decades ago are going to be relentlessly called in by anonymous sources and lead to lifetime bans. Statements by SafeSport as well as some practical considerations make it clear that this isn’t what is happening. For the most part, for a situation that occurred in the past, where the person is now an adult (let alone married) would not be of interest unless there is a complaint by one of the parties and a serious, clear abuse of power. For a lifetime ban, they also need a finding that the person is a current danger, not just that there was one questionable relationship that began 40 years ago.
The spouse could complain, and depending on the circumstances (ie ongoing) I can see that resulting in a ban. (Such a situation would probably also involve criminal domestic abuse.)
Everyone likes to manufacture these ideas that it could be “17 year old when he was 19” (which would be 50 years ago) but we’ve yet to see ANY cases like that come from SafeSport. SafeSport is really really busy. They have zero interest in going after random equestrians for something like that even if they thought that relationship was hinky. There’s no reason they’d even know or have any useful complaint unless a victim complained. The only way I can see a case like that even being in the file of a person they banned is if the accused ALSO has multiple other abuse of power complaints, in which case it’s there in support of a pattern. They’re interested in preventing abuse and preventing abusive people from having positions of power.
It’s the SafeSport policy to give a general statement of the issue without details, which is a middle ground to satisfy “but what did he DO?” while not exposing the complaintants to doxxing and further abuse and public attack. And we know that most complaintants who have come forward in equestrian (even the against the small time guys) have had to handle some pretty ugly blowback. Even simple statements like the year and the age of the complaintant during that year are personally identifying in our sport.