Have young horse in board and training care out of state. Have asked trainer to keep us updated with photos and videos. The first time we received the photos/videos she also shared them with the breeder we purchased the horse from as a foal. Next thing we find that the photos are on both their facebook pages. Many positive comments etc - all nice. But we are private people who don’t have facebook etc ourselves (my sister found it) and asked the trainer not to post the information in the future or share with breeder before asking us. Long story short - she did it again. Are we that out of touch to expect privacy and control over our own horse that we have paid for and are paying for board and training or is it common for people to distribute clients photos and information? Maybe we are too old school - but I just don’t think it’s right for the trainer or breeder to post our horse etc without asking us first and especially for the trainer that we asked not to do this at all. Isn’t it up to us as the owners to update the breeder and shouldn’t the breeder think twice before posting information not given by the owner but by a trainer out of state?
You have a PM.
As a breeder I find this thread just heartbreaking.
Just this past weekend I reconnected with a 2009 gelding I bred through his trainers FB page. Otherwise I never, ever would have known that he has a new career, is out there and training really well. He’s not showing under his registered name. It made me so very happy to see how well and happy HE is doing, and how well-regarded he is by the trainer, and how excited they are for the future. Though I have reached out to the owner in the past, she never kept me updated.
Breeders don’t get a lot of good news. We have frequent bad years with barren mares, and sick foals, and aborted foals, and pasture accidents. We need all the good news we can get.
ETA: Breeders are CLEARLY not in this for the money. We are in this because we want to breed successful, well-loved horses. All the the satisfaction I’ve ever gotten out of this endeavor has been through the happiness and success of the horses i bred. If I didn’t have that, why would I continue?
What ahf said. Although I do understand your point and as a breeder I do ask if it is ok to share (on my FB and/or on my website).
I think it may be in bad taste to do it after you asked them not too, but depending on how long/who actually runs the facebook page it may have been forgotten or message not passed to the right person. My horse is borrowed by a friend and a lesson horse, I find tons of random pictures of him on facebook from kids but nothing that would bother me. But I do know some people don’t like it and try not to do stuff like that or ask permission before posting. Most likely the first time they just had no idea you wouldn’t be ok with it.
What information is being given about the owner? Not like they are posting your Social Security number or contact information. Or posting pictures of your kid. It’s a horse. And clearly one that is growing up nicely. Guess I’m not sure I understand why you care that people are proud of your horse. Too each his own I supposed but I thinkyour reaction is a bit extreme for today’s day and age. If you really don’t want to see pictures posted, just say something again.
Eta: I personally would not have posted without your permission and certainly not named you but do think it is s bit out of touch with how most people operate today.
No. You’re not out of touch. I’m a breeder and I think my lines are great. i love pictures and updates and to say what teh offspring are doing. I respect the wishes of the buyers and don’t post anything they don’t want me to. Sometimes buyers don’t want it advertised that they purchased a horse or for how much or what the horse is doing for personal business. Some buyers stay in touch cuz they know they can trust me. It’s not all about me as a breeder it’s also about the buyer. I’m picky about who I sell to and a good home is better than a bad home that lets me put up pictures. Repeat business and referrals are impt to my business.
I can see OP’s point. The (paying) relationship is between present owner and trainer. Whatever gets put on Facebook seems like it will never go away and present owner is not in control of it. For example, if there is any resale in the future that will all be there (which for now at least looks positive) but again present owner is not choosing what goes up. Plus the horses are an extension of the owners–it does reveal something about them-not just about the horses.
[QUOTE=omare;7854541]
I can see OP’s point. The (paying) relationship is between present owner and trainer. Whatever gets put on Facebook seems like it will never go away and present owner is not in control of it. For example, if there is any resale in the future that will all be there (which for now at least looks positive) but again present owner is not choosing what goes up. Plus the horses are an extension of the owners–it does reveal something about them-not just about the horses.[/QUOTE]
I can understand that to a point but the OP said it was because they are private. I get that too and that is their right but just wouldn’t make a huge deal. I’m not saying it is OK but just noting that being overactive about what sounds like flattering photos it isn’t worth throwing a fit and flaming people. Just say something again. Being that private is unusual in these current times so they may have to say something more than once on this point for it to stick.
I sent a horse away to be broke a few years ago. The trainer asked me if I minded if he posted updates on FB. I replied, “absolutely AOK with me” and didn’t initially understand why it would be a question (given that I post lots of stuff about my own horses as they progress through training). He commented that his clients who are having young horses broke often don’t want to risk less than flattering information coming out during the early training process and potentially turning away potential buyers. So he only posted photos of those ok with it. I think that’s the appropriate way to handle it from a training perspective, and I do think that the trainer should listen to your request not to make info public that you don’t want out there. And if you haven’t given the nod to public posting, your name should not be brought into it at all.
So I think that it’s absolutely within your rights to not want your horse’s info shared by anyone other than you, but I also think you’re being unreasonable to a certain degree. Particularly as it pertains to the breeder. Breeding isn’t the most glorious of jobs, and I think it’s unfortunate that you don’t want the pics shared with the breeder (even if your only point of contention was that the trainer was sending it and it wasn’t coming from you). Though I guess my opinion about the sharing between the trainer and breeder would be different if the trainer didn’t know the breeder prior to sending info. If they had a prior relationship and the info being shared is positive, then I think that really is the new norm.
But at the end of the day I agree with BFNE and think you just need to have another conversation about it.
I totally agree with the op and I would send them an email in writing so you have a record and remind them that you previously asked and for them to respect your wishes. There are so many reasons not mentioned for not putting it out in the public eye.
I always ask. You have to. I had a situation where a friend of mine had some friends over to see my foals. I found photos plastered all over facebook that were… ummm… less than flattering. I was not pleased and had them removed immediately. I also ask people not to take photos of my horses unless I set them up (they can look all they want!), but I don’t allow poor photos posted. I think it’s disrespectful to be posting photos of other peoples horses without permission, especially if it’s a sale or breeding horse.
A horse is not a child, so it isn’t unethical for a barn or a trainer to post photos, etc. about the horses they are working with. However, I do think it is unprofessional for someone to post photos of a horse after being asked not to. More than likely the request was forgotten or not passed along to the right person, so I wouldn’t assume the worst, just politely repeat your request. You could also request that the trainer/breeder use a non-identifying nickname for the horse when they post so that they can use pictures without them being tied to you as the owner. For example, “Here’s Dobbin’s 2009 foal all grown up now.” I think you should consider carefully a way to allow the trainer and breeder as much as possible in a way that is tolerable to you. How is a breeder or trainer supposed to promote their business if every horse, activity or success is “top secret” according to the owners of the horses involved?
Dressage_Diva, I’m sorry, but I think it might be excessive to be asking friends of friends to be taking pictures down off of Facebook, especially if they were just innocent foal pictures by non-horse savvy folks. I’ve been in this position, but that’s the internet age for you, it’s impossible to control everything out there and sometimes you just gotta let it go.
Some of this could also be because of the logistical difficulty of sharing videos - you pretty much always need to use a site like youtube or vimeo or facebook because they are too large to email. All of these sharing sites have privacy settings such that they could be set to share with only you or only you and the breeder; a lot of horse people aren’t super savvy about how to work the privacy settings.
If you don’t want videos shared, I think your wishes should be respected.
Another possible path would be ‘please let me approve before you share.’ This takes care of concerns of unflattering situations, perhaps.
I do hope you’ll find a way to share with the breeder, one way or another.
Since when is it “OK” to put photos of other people’s animals, children, friends, houses, belongings, or relatives, on the internet against their wishes?
Not “OK”, even if it is often done. :no:
I am siding with the OP in this situation.
It does not matter if it is OK with you (general other person than the OP) that someone posts photos and stories about your horses all over. All that matters here is the OP owns the horse and does not want the information about the horse spread all over.
I would talk to the trainer again, assuming they simply forgot that you requested this previously.
I see both sides of the equation. If you ask her to take the pictures down she should 100% honor that request. But as a breeder, we literally pour our lives into these mares and foals and love to see them progress. They validate our efforts. Can you provide her with pictures you do approve of? One of my foals is with a COTHer now who bred her to a lovely stallion and had a gorgeous colt on her dam’s birthday. I am so grateful that she shares photos with me and allows me to share them with people who watched her come into the world via Marestare on my FB page.
[QUOTE=ahf;7854463]
As a breeder I find this thread just heartbreaking.
Just this past weekend I reconnected with a 2009 gelding I bred through his trainers FB page. Otherwise I never, ever would have known that he has a new career, is out there and training really well. He’s not showing under his registered name. It made me so very happy to see how well and happy HE is doing, and how well-regarded he is by the trainer, and how excited they are for the future. Though I have reached out to the owner in the past, she never kept me updated.
Breeders don’t get a lot of good news. We have frequent bad years with barren mares, and sick foals, and aborted foals, and pasture accidents. We need all the good news we can get.
ETA: Breeders are CLEARLY not in this for the money. We are in this because we want to breed successful, well-loved horses. All the the satisfaction I’ve ever gotten out of this endeavor has been through the happiness and success of the horses i bred. If I didn’t have that, why would I continue?[/QUOTE]
Then keep the horse & use your own money to train it & watch it develop. Whether or not you are in it for the money is irrelevant. The sob story is irrelevant. If the current owner doesn’t want pictures of their horse out there, that is their prerogative.
I know a couple owners who were rather annoyed when photos of their colts were posted by the stallion owner, prior to a big show, without their permission.
Pictures should never be used without permission, but providing pictures they can use is beneficial to both parties.
I have to side with the OP on this one. Yes, a breeder’s job is difficult and at times, thankless, for many reasons. However, I think that’s a separate issue. It
doesn’t mean it’s up to someone else to decide what they are going to share concerning my horse with the public or breeder without my permission. I would be upset, too and I don’t think the OP needs to have a reason that others think is acceptable. Their horse, their rules.
