Conflicted about trainer...

[ladyj79]

@AltersAreUs

Depends on what the agreement is. If it’s “Ride 6 times a week while the OP is dealing with her health” without an agreed upon set of goals, then as long as trainer’s butt is in the saddle, she’s meeting the service requirements. Is the OP paying for training with goals defined or is a loosey goosey arrangement of “I’ll keep him in shape & show him some while you’re out” sort of thing?

Yes I suggested at various points, as did others, that they clearly needed to sit down and chat. That doesn’t mean anything will be resolved. It also doesn’t mean the trainer or owner is self aware enough to realize the relationship has run its course for whatever reason. I think paying for training isn’t paying for hacking, and that if trainer is showing owner’s horse, it seems obvious that simply keeping the horse in marginal shape was not the understood agreement on either part.

but who knows.

the only thing we do know is owner feels trainer is not meeting her obligations, whether due to lack of skill or lack of interest.

[CHT]

It is possible that the trainer is/was embarrassed about what happened at the show and is aware of how disappointed your are/were, and now feels your relationship is strained/changed?

Unless I missed something, it seems the issue at the show wasn’t really addressed.

Sometimes new clients are more “exciting” as the trainer has more ideas to impart on the new person, and can make a bigger impact. “There is joy in a new set of problems” after all. She might be a little stuck on new ideas for your horse.

I would hope the relationship improves once you are back to being the main rider, but it still might be worthwhile researching other options.

(I don’t think you owe your trainer a conversation prior to deciding to move…just appropriate notice. I think a conversation is only helpful if you feel the relationship is salvageable)