Considering Euthanasia *Update* The Horse with 9 Lives

[Baysn_Blondes]

I’ve euthanized animals before and never felt the need to question if I’m doing the right thing, or if I’ve done enough, or if it’s really time, but everything with this horse is so much messier and so much more complicated, I need some outside opinions.

This is the same gelding from my previous threads. To recap, he’s a 12 year old OTTB with kissing spine and EPM. I had vets out again to check him over in February and they said he also had ulcers (and will likely need lifelong maintenance of them. I had assumed he was ulcery and treated them successfully with nexium before, but any stress made them flare up again) and also has traumatic nerve damage in his chest and his back. Between treating the ulcers, and the KS, and the EPM, I’ve been rehabbing unsuccessfully for over 2 years. He’s been turned out in pasture for the last 8 months, the EPM seems to be under control right now, but I know any stress can set it off again. When he has ulcer flare ups he definitely needs an experienced handler, someone who has good timing with a stud chain and good awareness to stay away from flying feet.

There haven’t been many good days in the last year. The back pain is pretty constant and nothing seems to help it. When I was out to see him last week though, it seemed to get a little better after he worked, but I keep reminding myself that this is the only time that’s happened. The vets think we might be able to get him rideable again but he’ll need chiro, and acupuncture, and gabapentin, and ulcer support, and probably hock and back injections. I’ve already pretty much tapped out my vet budget (at 4x what I paid for him), and I can only afford to keep one horse.

But, he seems relatively content in pasture so I can’t really say he has a consistently bad quality of life. He is currently living with his previous owner while I lease one of her horses (although she is making noise about wanting him back now that he’s rehabbed and trained), and if I euthanize my gelding it will absolutely burn the bridge on our friendship.

I will be talking with my barn manager about this next week, but my current thought is to bring him back to my barn, do 4 weeks of really focused rehab and reevaluate, but after this many years with no improvement I don’t have much hope for change. On the other hand, how do you euthanize a horse that seems perfectly healthy to the casual observer?

[RedHorses]

It’s not clear from your post - does the previous owner who is also the owner of your lease horse want the lease horse or your TB back?

[4horses]

Maybe give him back to the previous owner?

I had one horse I probably should have euthanized. But who wants to euthanize a 7 year old? He was the most athletic horse I had ever met. Unfortunately he had uveitis, was losing vision in one eye and was mentally a bit unstable due to ptsd. You could not medicate the eye without him fighting you (and I drew the line at getting hurt). So he will eventually go blind and/or need the eye removed. Eventually being the key word here. I didn’t think I could emotionally handle euthanasia so I found him a good home as a companion with a rather frank discussion on his prognosis and expected outcome. If it had been in both eyes, I would have euthanized.

His new owner will need to make that decision - euthanize or remove the one eye. if it jumps to both eyes then euthanasia will be the only option. I doubt he would be safe as a blind horse. That’s her decision now. The thing is, he was a very sweet horse, who was very badly abused and none of that was his fault.

Over time, it should be more clear if both eyes will be affected and that should make the decision easier. He could live 20 more years as a one eyed horse. Or not.

If a couple months of treatment will make the decision easier, then try that first. You have to be able to make a decision you can live with, without regret. I don’t think it’s wrong to euthanize a horse with multiple health issues, but it may not be the right decision either.

With a chronic condition like EPM, I would be okay with euthanasia because they often need expensive lifelong treatment and not treating isn’t an option. But I also know people that can afford to put their horse on meds continuously. Can you afford to keep going? Can the former owner afford his medications and treatment?

[sascha]

@Baysn_Blondes

The back pain is pretty constant and nothing seems to help it.

Your answer lies within your own words.

Whenever I question trying “harder” I look to our Code of Practice (for horses, other livestock, it’s basically the same for all) and remember the bit about being obligated to end an animal’s suffering if there is no reasonable expectation of recovery. <-- that’s paraphrased, but pretty much exactly what it says in terms of the obligation to keep an animal from long-term suffering one way or another.

Please don’t feel guilty, and if at all possible, do not give this horse to someone who may prolong the suffering by trying one more thing, or by not so benign neglect.

It’s never easy, but doing right by our animals’ when they are suffering pretty much non stop is our duty.

[Libby2563]

Have you offered him back to the previous owner? If she won’t take him back but wants to pass judgment on you for putting him out of his misery, then I wouldn’t count her as a true friend anyway. I’d bring him home, maybe do a few weeks of rehab if that makes you feel better, then euthanize. He sounds miserable with no hope of recovery. Or if you think the move would flare up his ulcers, is there a teaching hospital you could take him to instead that would put him down promptly and get some value from his death?

The fact that he gets dangerous to handle when his ulcers flare should be very concerning to someone who boards. That might even be how you present the situation to his previous owner—that you can’t accept the liability of him possibly injuring a worker at your boarding barn.

I’m sorry you’re in this position. I’ve had to put down a 5-year-old who had no hope of recovery but seemed basically happy, so I understand the doubts. It really does sound like you’ve done right by him so far and just need to take the final step…

[Bluey]

Several of our veterinarians over the decades now have at one time or another struggled with the clients that are trying to keep an animal alive that has a poor quality of life, that is no way anyone can make better.

Let’s not be that client, remember animals cognition doesn’t include a vision of futures missed.
Animals live in the present and in general don’t understand what all we do with and to them.
When we keep trying this and that knowing is only prolonging a poor quality of life, we are not any more being fair to them.

Is it terribly hard to make the final decision?
Absolutely, it should be, is too final, we need to be sure is the correct decision, that is where veterinarians can help you, but is still up to you to go there, our responsibility to the animal in our care.

Keep in mind, in terminal situations, too soon is better than a minute too late, when suffering is involved.

[2tempe]

@Baysn_Blondes

The vets think we might be able to get him rideable again but he’ll need chiro, and acupuncture, and gabapentin, and ulcer support, and probably hock and back injections. I

Its hard to tell vet’s intent when reading a post, but somehow this sentence jumped out at me as wrong. If you have to do all this (and they are not 1x things) just to maybe get a horse with EPM and KS rideable, is this even fair to the horse? I would have to wonder given his issues, including the nerve damage, would this horse even be safe enough to ride?
OP - you say two things that have me a bit confused: first that his back pain is pretty constant, and second that he seems content in pasture. But IMO you know the horse best. If he is in pain, and has issues that cant be managed, I would euthanize. How the horse looks to a casual observer doesn’t matter.

[Obsidian_Fire]

@Baysn_Blondes

On the other hand, how do you euthanize a horse that seems perfectly healthy to the casual observer?

That is nobody’s business but yours and the vets. Period. Full stop.

[ProfAmEq]

This. Having had to put down a horse who was fine one week and gone the next, people had questions and I told them that i did what I could and the vets agreed it was the most humane thing to do. I didn’t want to talk about it, it was a painful thing for me, so why should I put myself through the added stress of justifying it to anyone else?

To the OP: I was close to being in your situation a year ago. But, after some treatment (paid by insurance), a barn move, and a slow restart, she has recovered and doesn’t require any special maintenance beyond what I would provide her anyway (occasional bodywork, gut supplements, shoes, and regular work).

That said, if she relapses, I am not going to take drastic measures and treat with thousands of dollars I don’t have—insurance won’t cover it a second time. I would put her down. I wouldn’t let anyone else “try” with her again if I felt she was dangerous or couldn’t trust them with her. Don’t feel guilty if you’re there now.

[NancyM]

It doesn’t matter to the horse, he won’t know about the pain of your decision. It only matters to you. Truly internalizing this realization helps.

[Baysn_Blondes]

She is wanting to take the horse I am leasing back. When we started epm treatment the vets and I agreed that it would be good to give him 6-8 months off in a pasture to recuperate, so his previous owner and I worked out a deal where she boarded my horse in exchange for a full care lease on a horse she needed rehabbed and tuned up.

I would not feel comfortable giving my horse back to her, nor do I think she would take him back.

[Baysn_Blondes]

So when I say he’s content, if he’s not being handled and you stood at his fence you wouldn’t immediately pick him out as a horse that’s in pain or sick. He eats, drinks, and walks around. The problems and pain responses are observable any time he is groomed or lunged, or any time there’s any pressure on his back. He was so difficult to handle in his last vet visit (which in my experience with him is how he expresses discomfort) the vet asked me, half joking I think, if I really felt it was safe to try and ride this horse.

The ethics of having to give him all these medications, do all these treatments, and then do more treatments to mitigate the side effects of the other treatment has weighed heavily on me. It feels like a lot to do with no guarantee this will help, and could potentially make things worse.

[2tempe]

It sucks sometimes being a horse owner…Sorry you are in this position, but know that you will get moral support from here for sure.

[Viranh]

In a similar position myself with a 13 yo with navicular that hasn’t responded to any treatment for more than a few weeks. It just sucks. I don’t know that there’s really a clear right or wrong answer here as long as you’re not neglecting the horse. I don’t think it’s wrong to euthanize a horse in chronic pain though, regardless of age.

[SFrost]

I’m so sorry you and your horse are going through this. From the standpoint of having worked in the veterinary field and as a former barn employee I have yet to run across a situation where if an owner is thinking about putting a horse down it would be the wrong decision. If you’re thinking about it I feel like your gut is telling you you aren’t wrong. You’ve clearly done a lot for your horse and tried to get him happy and comfortable.

As a horse owner though, I understand struggling with this decision. I haven’t shared this on the board yet but I recently put my horse, Two Snakes, down. I’ll share a bit of the story in hopes it offers you some comfort.

He still had good days left in him. I did feel like I could have kept trying more things to keep him somewhat comfortable a bit longer but at the same time I did everything I could within reason or a long, long time. I struggled with that final decision for several months. I read somewhere to ask yourself “what are you waiting for”. What’s the line? That really hit home with me because I wasn’t sure. I truly didn’t have the answer until I saw it. He was laying down and had a lot of trouble getting up. He was in pain. He did get up on his own but I could see it wasn’t comfortable for him and I couldn’t allow him to have that pain and struggle every time he needed to lay down. He had trouble just being a horse some days but others he’d run around like a fool. His issues were arthritis, Cushings, and ringbone. I also suspected EPM as I was seeing signs of neuro issues. I couldn’t give Equioxx consistently anymore because his stomach seemed to bother him. I considered leaving him on ulcer treatment for the rest of his life so he could have meds but that wasn’t right for him or me. The expense alone was prohibitive. I felt really guilty about it all. He still had good days left in him. But when those would stop, I’d be looking at putting a horse down who at least for me would have suffered too much. The financial aspect is also important. I know I went above what I was comfortable with and I don’t regret it but the only thing it offered was for me to say I tried more than I should have. Please don’t feel guilty factoring that into your decision.

I also had people asking me if I was sure I wanted to let him go and that made it even harder. It hurt my feelings and made me a bit angry as well. At the end of the day the decision is for you and your vet only. No one else should offer any advice unless asked. And they certainly shouldn’t be judging you. If your friend would end your relationship over this that’s on them, not you. That’s easier for me to say since I’m not in your shoes but it’s clear you want to do right by your horse. Your friend should see that.

Snake’s last day was a wonderful day for him. He felt good, was moving well and eating, he seemed fine to someone who didn’t know him. I thought that would make it harder but I was relieved he didn’t go out on a day he was suffering and in excessive pain.

If you decide to go with euthanasia- you made the right choice. If you decide to try something else- you made the right choice. There’s no wrong answer here. You very clearly have your horse’s best interest at heart and that is such a wonderful thing. A lot of horses don’t have such wonderful caring owners. Unfortunately sometimes the best interest aspect is the hardest part of having these beautiful creatures in our lives.

Letting them go what someone would view as “too soon” is 1000% kinder than one minute too late. Sending so many hugs and positive vibes your way. Whatever you decide take comfort in knowing you having given your horse a good life. A life filled with love, compassion and kindness.

[Wantanother]

About 5 months ago I had to put down a wonderful 16 year old mare. She was sound one day and in full blown founder the next. All her tests were within normal range, she had no history of laminitis and had recently been tested for Cushings and insulin resistance… We could find no physical reason for the attack. She was in agony despite everything we tried. On day 3 her coffin bones started to sink. My vet explained the treatment options, and possible outcomes. I opted to euthanize. She was an exceptional riding horse and I was lucky to have had 9 great years with her. But, she was an independent, arrogant alpha mare who loved to work and enjoyed her grass.

In all good conscience, I couldn’t inflict months of confinement and pain on her for the chance that she might be able to hobble around in a dirt paddock. I know I made the right decision for her, but it still hurts. I feel that I was honored to have had her for as long as I did.

[Alex_and_Bodie_s_Mom]

@Baysn_Blondes

So when I say he’s content, if he’s not being handled and you stood at his fence you wouldn’t immediately pick him out as a horse that’s in pain or sick. He eats, drinks, and walks around. The problems and pain responses are observable any time he is groomed or lunged, or any time there’s any pressure on his back.

This right here, plus his obvious distress and being borderline dangerous when his ulcers flare up, would be the deciding factor for me. My guess is that he does feel pain in the pasture, but just isn’t showing it. Given everything you’ve shared with us, I would not hesitate to give this horse a quiet and compassionate end.

I have been on the other side of “waited too long.” I still feel guilt over those. We want it to be black and white, crystal clear, the only choice we can make - but too often it’s a thousand shades of gray. “We could do this. We might try this. He could come out of it.” But too often, all of that is wishful thinking and ends in late-night emergency vet calls. I think now it’s far better to be able to pick the time and day, before those emergency calls become necessary.

If anyone judges you for euthanizing your horse, that’s their problem. He’s your horse. You know him best. If you think further treatments might help, AND you can afford them, by all means you should try them. But sooner or later, we have to ask how fair it is to the horse - and ourselves.

[RMJacobs]

Regarding being judged for euthanizing: I had a mare who was probably at least in her mid 30s. Suddenly, she got aggressive with my husband (who had previously been her best friend), couldn’t figure out where her food was when it was right in front of her, and generally acted like she’d lost her mind. Given her age and how dangerous she’d suddenly become (from previously having good ground manners), we opted to euthanize.

My neighbor across the road, who had been a good friend up until this, was telling other neighbors that I murdered my mare for no reason. So much for that friendship. It was so clear to me that she was wrong, I never worried about it.

If you think it’s time, then it’s time. No one else gets to weigh in on that decision. If the horse can be dangerous when in pain, then I think that’s a pretty clear reason. If the horse has multiple medical issues, then that’s a pretty clear reason as well.

They are so stoic. But I think you have enough information to make the call. I’m so sorry it’s come to this.

Rebecca

[IPEsq]

Someone I know had to put their horse down, and by the time the call was made, anyone watching the horse in the paddock could see the discomfort, or at least very unusual stance and behaviors, even though the horse was quiet and well behaved. It took a lot of meds to walk the horse to a good spot for euthanasia. It was far too late by that point. Non-horse people don’t know all of the million of little signs that something is wrong with a horse. Don’t let that be the standard for your decision. It is more important that you know your horse well.

[Baysn_Blondes]

Thank you so much for sharing, hugs for your loss. You brought up a lot of good points, I don’t want to wait until he’s obviously suffering, or can’t get back up. I also have been feeling guilty about the financial aspect of attempting to manage his symptoms. I’m comfortable owning a horse, but the meds and treatments the vet are recommending would put a strain on my horse budget.