Dogs in Cemeteries

[SuckerForHorses]

My co-worker takes her two dogs to local cemeteries to let them run around because their yard isn’t very big. They run free, not on leashes.

She says if they poop she picks it up, but they are still urinating which she can’t do anything about. Even picking the poop up doesn’t make it any better in my opinion.

Whenever she tells me “we took the dogs to the cemetery last night…” it really bugs me…I just find it so disrespectful that her dogs are going to the bathroom in the cemetery.

Am I being ridiculous to be annoyed by this? I don’t dwell on it or anything, but I have told her that I find it disrespectful and she just says “oh I pick up the poop!”

I don’t bother saying anything to her anymore, just smile and nod when she tells me.

[rubles]

A cemetery is a quiet, safe environment to walk a dog on a leash. That’s OK with me. To take a dog to visit the grave of his former care giver while leashed is also OK with me. It is not an off-leash dog park.

[hoopoe]

willing to bet if you look on line for the cemetery there will be a list of rules

some prohibit pets all together, probably for the very reason you state.

while some places consider cemeteries private land, owned by the plot and vault holders, others consider them public land akin to parks

Even public lands, however, have rules.

I do not consider your co-worker clever or thoughtful. I am not a believer in cemeteries, but I respect the memory of those there and their loved ones.

[SuckerForHorses]

[QUOTE=rubles;8406576]
A cemetery is a quiet, safe environment to walk a dog on a leash. That’s OK with me. To take a dog to visit the grave of his former care giver while leashed is also OK with me. It is not an off-leash dog park.[/QUOTE]

She isn’t going to visit anybody she knows and the dogs don’t stay on leashes. They are free to run and poop and pee wherever they want, including on top of people’s grave sites.

If she just took them to walk them around the “roads” in the cemetery on leashes I would be fine with that as well.

[SmartAlex]

[QUOTE=SuckerForHorses;8406554]
Whenever she tells me “we took the dogs to the cemetery last night…” it really bugs me…I just find it so disrespectful that her dogs are going to the bathroom in the cemetery. [/QUOTE]

I agree. Reasonable or not, I’m sure there are many people buried there, not to mention their families, who would also be very offended. Which is why most Cemetaries post “No Dogs” on the gates

[rubles]

So we pretty much agree with each other.

[Casey09]

I would not do it, but at the same time I also kind of feel that large tracts of land devoted to cemeteries is something that we will eventually have to see as a multi purpose area. I grew up with one side of the family that would be scandalized by a dog in a cemetery, and the other side that would be more concerned with the money that could have been saved by cremation. I suppose I’d be a little shocked by the disregard for the “rules,” but personally I wouldn’t be offended by it.

[toady123]

We have a large cemetery in town that is used frequently by dog walkers, bikers, runners, etc. Dogs are often off leash, although they tend to congregate to one side of the property that is wooded and doesn’t have many headstones. Doesn’t seem to bother anyone (or at least enough that it comes up in the local news etc).

I agree with others that it is obnoxious to have them off-leash if it breaks the rules or leads to dogs peeing on headstones. Walking on leash however I have no issue with, and have done it myself (this particular cemetery allows does not ban dogs).

[EKLay]

I frequently walk my dogs in cemeteries, but they are 1) leashed, 2) behave, and 3) I clean up after them as necessary.

I like looking at/reading old gravestones, so we do wander through rather than staying on the perimeter, but we don’t walk over anyone, just in between.

[Dewey]

I used to do this all the time when I was growing up. Our New England town was sprinkled with small cemeteries, some of them hundreds of years old. There were no signs posted, and people used the cemeteries for walking and even picnics. We used to ride through them on trail rides (on the dirt through roads). No one thought anything of it.

I like to think those people at rest would have liked to see the happy activity around their graves. No one showed any disrespect, and occasionally someone would wander over to look at an old inscription on one of the headstones. In the midst of death, we are in life.

[EasternMkt]

Our large, historical cemetery is a local dog park. It wasn’t being kept up and the dog owners formed a membership entity that pays for the cemetery maintenance. It’s pretty widely supported: http://www.cemeterydogs.org/

I want to be cremated, but I still love the idea of happy activities around graves.

[TBROCKS]

If my Dad thought someone was letting their dog pee on his gravestone, he’d be…wait for it…pissed.

[BuddyRoo]

I think it’s pretty disrespectful to the living to allow a pet to urinate on someone’s headstone. However, I think that cemeteries are wonderful places to walk and I enjoy reading headstones so I have taken my dogs through cemeteries many times.

But they’re leashed. And I don’t let them take a dump on someone’s gravesite nor urinate on a head stone. That’s just…rude.

Your colleague needs to go to a dog park.

[SuckerForHorses]

[QUOTE=Dewey;8406887]
I used to do this all the time when I was growing up. Our New England town was sprinkled with small cemeteries, some of them hundreds of years old. There were no signs posted, and people used the cemeteries for walking and even picnics. We used to ride through them on trail rides (on the dirt through roads). No one thought anything of it.

I like to think those people at rest would have liked to see the happy activity around their graves. No one showed any disrespect, and occasionally someone would wander over to look at an old inscription on one of the headstones. In the midst of death, we are in life.[/QUOTE]

That’s the thing…in her case, I think she is showing disrespect by allowing her dogs to run free and urinate and defecate on people’s headstones and grave sites.

Walking through or around in a cemetery with a dog on a leash I have no problems with.

[Anne_FS]

[QUOTE=Dewey;8406887]
I used to do this all the time when I was growing up. Our New England town was sprinkled with small cemeteries, some of them hundreds of years old. There were no signs posted, and people used the cemeteries for walking and even picnics. We used to ride through them on trail rides (on the dirt through roads). No one thought anything of it.

I like to think those people at rest would have liked to see the happy activity around their graves. No one showed any disrespect, and occasionally someone would wander over to look at an old inscription on one of the headstones. In the midst of death, we are in life.[/QUOTE]

This is entirely different that what the OP is talking about. I agree with you and yes, it used to be common what you say. Traditionally, kids would play in the cemetery, too, but were never disrespectful, even if touching the gravestones. Was probably actually a good thing & helped to teach the normalcy of the circle of life.

The “happy activity” does not include dog s*** and pee on peoples’ graves, so IMO OP’s co-worker is out of line. The dead don’t know what’s happening but funerals and graveyards are for the living, and if a bereaved person would come by and see a dog taking a s*** on their loved one’s grave, or lifting a leg on their tombstone, that’s just mean.

Walking the dogs on leash is fine IMO.

[danceronice]

In DC, you can join the K9 friends of Congressional Cemetery and part of the membership privileges is allowing your dog to go off-leash in the Cemetery (within reason; not during funerals or the occasional special event–they have movies, since Sousa’s buried there they had a band once, etc, and I assume not when the goat mowing herd is down in the brush area along the fence). Only problem I experienced is a black lab bounding unexepectedly out from among the tombstones when I hadn’t seen any other people almost gave me a heart attack. TBH, city air is going to do as bad or worse damage to a stone than the occasional dog peeing (unless it’s the ‘white bronze’ zinc stones; would have to look into that) and based on all my experience with human remains and cemeteries, the people in the grave don’t care. As long as solid waste gets picked up it doesn’t bother me. People tipping stones, using flour or chalk or doing rubbings, and other human misadventures do a lot more damage every day.

[SuckerForHorses]

TBH, city air is going to do as bad or worse damage to a stone than the occasional dog peeing

It’s not simply being concerned about damage (although that may be a concern, I don’t know), but the act of peeing on the stone itself that I find disrespectful.

[hastyreply]

I’m not sure what answer you want. I think most have said it was disrespectful. Obviously your friend doesn’t feel that way. It’s pretty much about how you were raised and what you consider to be wrong. I’ve often taken a dog, leashed and walked around a cemetery to kill time waiting for someone. I may have on occasion worked on off leash behavior. My dog didn’t urinate on any headstones.

If it really bothers you say something. I don’t think it will change your friend’s mind and she may take it as a personal criticism and it could hurt the friendship. It’s up to you.

[Dewey]

[QUOTE=Anne FS;8407211]
This is entirely different that what the OP is talking about. I agree with you and yes, it used to be common what you say. Traditionally, kids would play in the cemetery, too, but were never disrespectful, even if touching the gravestones. Was probably actually a good thing & helped to teach the normalcy of the circle of life.

The “happy activity” does not include dog s*** and pee on peoples’ graves, so IMO OP’s co-worker is out of line. The dead don’t know what’s happening but funerals and graveyards are for the living, and if a bereaved person would come by and see a dog taking a s*** on their loved one’s grave, or lifting a leg on their tombstone, that’s just mean.

Walking the dogs on leash is fine IMO.[/QUOTE]

OP is entitled to her feelings.

I used to walk run my dog off leash in a cemetery all the time and so did lots of other people I know. I never saw my dog or any other peeing or defecating on a grave, but I am not going to swear it never happened.

I understand how OP feels; I just have a different opinion. I don’t think running a dog loose in a cemetery is disrespectful, as long as the owner keeps an eye on it as is proper anywhere. Remember we don’t actually know if her friend’s dog is urinating on headstones. This is something OP is speculating on. She said her friend is picking up any poop her dog makes, so IMO, she’s being responsible.

[SuckerForHorses]

Even if the dog does not urinate on a headstone I think it is still disrespectful if it urinates on the grave site itself. I think one can safely assume that if the dogs are loose, and they are, they are not likely to urinate on the gravel road so the chances of them urinating on a grave site which is under the grass are pretty high.