Hi! I haven’t been able to find an answer to this on any forum so I hope someone has advice!
I don’t think it is wrong to not share your tack.
In my experience it is the owner’s responsibility to provide tack that fits the horse, not the responsibility of one person leasing to provide it for the other person leasing.
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I’m like you, I buy good quality, expensive tack and other stuff and would not share it with anyone else, especially someone who doesn’t care for it properly . It’s the owner’s responsibility to provide appropriate tack and equipment for their horse, not yours, and you should not feel any obligation whatsoever to share.
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The only thing that will make a significant difference to his comfort is a better fitting saddle and pad. The other items are for your enjoyment. Be warned that it’s likely none of this will fit your next horse, not even halter or bridle or bit.
Since the other leaser has shown she is a slob who is unable to care for tack I would not lend her anything. Strap goods are easy to break and can deteriorate with bad care.
If the other leaser is not looking after tack properly its up to the owner to comment.
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That’s a good point. I feel badly for the horse, but at the end of the day the problem doesn’t originate with me. I’ll exert soft pressure in the owner and continue to do my best with the horse. Thanks for you me thoughts!
Thanks for your thoughts! That was my gut reaction, but wanted to make sure I wasn’t being weirdly possessive.
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Thanks for your thoughts! I’ll see if I can wheedle the owner into finding the horse something better fitting, otherwise it doesn’t seem like my issue to solve.
Yeahhh it’s a bummer about needing new tack for the next horse, but it makes 100% sense and I’m fine with taking a hit on resale in order to get the proper equipment. I am hoping against hope that I find a unicorn that my saddle will fit - I’m very tall and disproportionate in my legs and it took so long to find a saddle that fit me. You should have seen the bizarre positions that the school tack put me into.
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Considering the expense of quality tack and equipment, you have a right to be possessive. I’m sure you worked hard to earn the money to buy your tack, etc. Someone who is careless about the care and cleaning of the lease horse and his equipment is unlikely to reimburse you if she damages or loses it either.
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Nah, no need to share. I will lend stuff only to friends who I know take care of gear and who can be trusted to replace anything damaged/broken - or if it’s something I truly don’t care about getting broken or lost. Random fellow half-leasers who don’t clean tack? Pass. Enjoy your nice gear and the freedom of not cleaning up after others!
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That’s true, I ended up with two saddles and a slew of bridles, halters and bits that way but I always found a use for it eventually. And I had good luck with bridles and halters often fitting more than one horse. Whether you lease or own, it never hurts to have your own stuff if you can afford it.
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One time I half leased a horse with a long time barn mate that I considered a friend. Friend was technically leasing horse from his owner and was ‘in charge’, along with trainer. At home we each used our own stuff. One show she took my bridle without telling me, because she needed the bit or something. I came for my next ride after the show and had to search through her tack trunk to find my bridle, now in multiple dirty pieces. Unfortunately this became symptomatic of her treatment of my stuff, and culminated in sending horse back to owner with my halter, again without telling me.
We are no longer friends and I will not share my equipment with people unless they have proven themselves with taking care of and replacing my things.
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No. Don’t share your nice stuff. Unless you know the other person is even more conscientious than you are, it will not end well.
I had my horse half leased and let the woman use my saddle. Well, while jumping the horse (which she was not allowed to do when alone), she fell off and the horse bolted through the woods and branches left huge scratches on it. While I was glad she wasn’t injured, the horse needed stitches and my saddle was never the same. The lease ended after that because she could not respect the rules, but it burned me to look at the scratches on my saddle for months.
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Having full leased, part ,leased, owned, borrowed and exercised all sorts of horses, always used my own saddle. No owner or lease partner offered me use of their personal saddle. Thats 3 disciplines in 4 states over decades. So have to say its not expected or customary and OP needs not need get defensive about not caring to share her saddle with the other part leaser.
Bridles are a bit more horse specific but since OP doesn’t own the horse, just shares the lease? No reason to provide her bridle, lease partner can use the one the owner provides.
Far as accumulating tack, most go thru many horses in their riding journey. Who knows when or if something will work on a future horse. Especially if rider stays in the same discipline, probably going to be similar type for similar job and many things will fit.
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I just hoard it all, at SOME point won’t there be a horse that fits a 4.75" bit in my life? And then I’ll be sorry that I got rid of it…right? Right? 
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I would not feel the need to share tack. We have a similar half-lease situation where the adult enjoys buying, cleaning, and caring for her very nice ($$$) tack and the child uses the tack provided by the owner. Part of the enjoyment of riding is enjoying the ritual of it. Caring for and enjoying nice tack that is only yours makes sense.
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Unless the owner offers to buy your saddle, you don’t need to share it. It’s the owners duty to do what needs to be done to make the horse comfortable, and it sounds like the owner can see the current saddle isn’t the best for the horse
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Hey, I have had two horses that took a 4 3/4” bit. 30years apart. You never know.
Far as lease partner feeling better in OPs saddle, yeah, I feel better in a Mercedes then my Subaru but my neighbor wont let me use theirs.
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we still have one rider’s saddle they brought here for them to use on one of our horses (basically was a free lease) … that saddle was only used by her… and it is still in our tack room from twenty years ago. Some day she will pick it up I am told.
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As others have said, I think if you already feel uncomfortable with the other person’s cleaning and tidiness habits you are going to be very unhappy if they share your stuff!
When I leased out my older guy it was to a junior at my barn who I had known since she was riding ponies. She was in my trainer’s program and I trusted both of them. I let her use all of my horse’s things as she wanted because I knew she would take care of them. Over time she accumulated her own tack and such, all of which fit him and were good quality, although she continued to use some of my stuff. When I retired that horse I sold or gave her the things she had been using for her new horse. There is no way I would have shared my stuff with someone I didn’t know as well, or that I knew had messy habits.
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Agreed. I have probably more tack than I’ll ever actually need (and my bridle collection is insanely massive; I think I have a problem there, lol), but there has been many times it’s come in really handy. Like you, I’ve had good luck with halters and bridles fitting multiple horses. I also have a collection of girths in various sizes, along with a girth extender, which always seem to come in handy.
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