I assume you’re responding to Alterration, not me, cause I agree that the apology was sufficient for the situation.
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Yes
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jumping off point
Another invaluable lesson, everyone has an opinion.
Not all of them are equal.
OP is choosing to listen to the ones in her proximity: the barn where she boards*, the trainers near her*, the vets* her barn suggests or allows she use, etc…
Any one of those, or all of them, could be offering bad advice. Any or all could be fine, but not fully aware of better ways.
Depending on the pool of potential options, you may not have great options.
Its as likely those she replies on are not great as the advice offered here on coth being poor.
.
*all of these choices get made for a reason; sometimes it’s financial, sometimes it’s proximity, sometimes it’s cause you know the person or heard good things from people you know.
All of those are fallible.
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My vet for my horse didn’t follow the latest protocols on EPM testing and sent me away saying Chip didn’t have it. I was desperate for answers and would have had him retested had I known. Instead I didn’t and now that he’s doing great there would be no point. Only months later when I caught up with my previous vet (who now lives 1000 miles) away did I learn of the vet’s mistake. So my NEW vet going forward is 90 minutes away but worth it. She did a full eval and work up on him in July so she has a baseline on him. For routine stuff I continue to use the lesser DVMs closer to me.
Vets are just people, some are better than others.
This honey-horse needs to gain weight and she’s not making the strides a healthy* 14* year old should make.
*assumptions.
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I don’t think anyone doubts the OP is doing her best and you can see how deeply she loves Honey.
I also don’t see " claws coming out" but more accurately concerns that need to be said in 2 areas that I can see. It is said in the best interests of Honey’s recovery, not only in my part but from the concerns others have posted.
I realize that OP being in a boarding situation changes things and for those of us who have brought horses back from neglect it is far easier to do when you are the one who is feeding them.
I do hope she continues to post and update us here because I really want to see that picture when Honey is at her ideal weight and OP is having a blast riding her. It will come but more time is needed.
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We removed some of the back-and-forth from last night to hopefully help things “simma down” a bit and encourage the return of a calmer, more productive tone to the thread. Hopefully the OP will return after a breather!
Best wishes @AdultEmmy – we hope you’re continuing to get lots of joy out of your time with Honey, especially while life is experiencing some twists.
Threads can get overwhelming when they start moving fast, especially when there are differences of opinion, but I think everyone here would agree that you want the best for your horse… they just have different ideas of what “best” may be in a given situation!
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No one has mentioned pain.
A horse in pain loses weight and does not put it back on until out of pain.
Sim hit his hip on a fence or gate while joining. He went downhill quickly. We took him to our chiropractor, he put weight back on again. Weeks for both not 3 months.
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Thank you 
!
Please come back OP.
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couldn’t resist!
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Great advice. Agree with everything you recommend. Only thing I would personally add is to not ride her at this time.
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Gorgeous horse and great re-feeding program. Thanks for taking him back and giving him a wonderful last 3 years. 
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Good program. After a painful learning curve (for both me and the mare I had at the time), forever after, I used local vets for obvious stuff like stitching wounds, routine vax, and hauled to the closest big vet clinic (NBC, Ohio State, Davis, Texas A&M, Rood and Riddle, etc) for everything else. It was always worth the time, effort and expense.
You have to get a correct diagnosis to implement the best treatment plan. If not, you’re wasting your money and doing a disservice to your horse.
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I too would probably get a “bigger” vet involved for a better diagnosis, and not be convinced this was the right vet for the horse based on her not gaining on the rec9mmendations. I had missed the farrier asking if the horse had foundered. I wouldnt ride her without x-rays and believe the horse is probably in pain somewhere if she was rearing.
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OK, now this is a stretch and a long one. I wonder if Honey is in foal. Perhaps her belly is getting a bit bigger, but the rest of her isn’t and the OP see’s that as weight gain. And all she’s feeding her is going to the foal so no real gain.
I’ve seen this happen, owner insisted mare was getting proper feed and was gaining when in fact mare was quite thin but preggo. A stretch. I know. But I had to post it as I’ve seen the dynamics before.
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I have been wondering about pregnancy too.
That big vein on her in her girth area heading back has me asking this question.
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To make it easier for others to refer to - here are photos of Honey where the milk vein is prominent.
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Interesting. But wouldn’t the vet have checked that out?
To me with my specific horse background there is something unusual about Honey’s posture and I think this is in part what posters are responding to. My only exposure IRL to saddlebreds was two local horses with congenital lordosis. They were adopted/ rescued by a teen girl who actually put a lot of miles on the worst one, the horse was not in pain. Honey is not showing real lordosis at all, but something about the scoop of the back and how her neck is set on makes me think it could be a tendency. And lordosis plays havoc on the top line.
I also knew two aged Iberian cross mares by the same sire who had slightly sway backs in extreme old age. Even in good weight it was hard to develop top line after the sway started. They were both ridden happily into old age, I competed on one when she was 28 or 29, I had to get a six shim pad for her but she was still super happy and forward and could do all the things
So I think with Honey we are seeing a bit of a sway back pulling down her topline in a way mere calories can’t fix, and that (from my own observations of 4 horses with sway or lordosis) that sensible exercise is part of the solution.
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Not necessarily as she wasn’t advertised as being bred.
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I want to second this.
Preg checks are not a normal part of a pre-purchase on a mare, UNLESS the owner specifically asks or if there’s a question that they’ve been exposed to a stallion.
I wouldn’t blame a vet for missing a pregnancy especially since the pre-purchase was 90 days ago, and she would have likely been bred in March or April.
I also want to restate that I sincerely hope @AdultEmmy comes back to this thread. I can’t imagine trying to cope with all the emotional and financial upheaval of a divorce, AND being a new horse owner and trying to sort through all the advice and recommendations. I am sure she is overwhelmed; but I really think she needs the support, advice and occasional reality check that this board can provide.
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