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How do you tell a horse seller you're no longer interested?

How do you politely pass on a horse who has no screaming issues but just doesn’t feel like The One? Or maybe it checks most of your boxes but you really wish it checked others. I feel bad turning down horses when I’ve chatted with the owner, asked for pictures or videos, etc. and not trying to waste anyone’s time. Do you tell them the real reason you’re no longer interested (very kindly)? Make something up? Is, “Sorry, I’m no longer interested,” appropriate?

I’m timidly horse shopping with the hope that this will be a horse I have long term and therefore want to feel like I need this horse in my life when I make a decision to bring it home. For whatever reason when I’ve gotten horses with the intention move them on later I don’t feel as bad turning them down.

I just say “Thank you for all the information but he/she is not quite what I am looking for”

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This ^^^

I had a seller once press me “Please tell me what’s wrong with her so I can know it too. I really want to know.”

After deferring twice I finally listed the things I didn’t like about the mare; the seller didn’t really want to know. Learn from my mistake!

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“Thank you so much for your time and for sending videos, pictures and answering all of my questions. It is truly appreciated. However, with some further thought, I do believe that I am looking for something different. I think your horse is lovely and I truly hope you find the perfect situation for Fluffy. Thanks again and I wish you both the best.”

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Ditto. I’ve used this language many times when deciding a horse was not right for me.

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It never hurts to be nice. It takes a lot of time to sell a horse. Plus if you change your mind and want to pursue the horse or the same seller offers another horse you are interested in, they will be much more likely to want to speak with you again.

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I always find something nice about the horse and tell the seller the attributes I thought were really positive. Sometimes, but not always, I will offer an opinion about what the horse would be suited for. I always do it in a positive way. For example, a horse that isn’t a great dressage mover may be a perfect child’s hunter and would sell for more. As far as I know, I haven’t offended anyone. I am selective about what I say and who I say it to.

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“Thanks so much! Lovely horse, just not the right one for me.”

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As others, I would say, “Thank you so much showing me your horse. He/she isn’t quite the right fit for me.”

If I really do think the horse is nice and could be good for someone else looking, I might add, “If I hear of anyone looking who I think would be a great match, I’ll be sure to send them your way!”

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A little horse shopping tip: keep your initial communication short. Ask the dealbreaker questions first. Get the video, THEN have the longer conversation if it’s warranted. People are less likely to be annoyed if you haven’t made them spend hours on the phone, or texting/emailing back and forth…

And all that’s needed is:
Thank you so much for your time. Fluffy is a lovely horse, but not the right match for me. I’ll be sure to pass his information along, and I’m sure you will find his perfect person.

If all you’ve done is ask for video and price, then there is no need for a “thanks-no thanks” communication. The better you get at this, the faster you will reject horses based on video and maybe not even a short conversation. Have a professional review the videos before you get too excited.

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And beware of sellers who hound you… when I was shopping there was a couple who after I had turned them down, pressed me hard to take the horse anyway, for various reasons.

All I’ve ever said was “thanks, not quite what I’m looking for”. Usually that is enough.

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This is definitely the way to go. I feel a little bad when I ask for something specific, they deliver, and it’s a dealbreaker. But I guess someone else is just as likely to ask.

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I like this approach. Anyone who owns a horse or has sold one expects rejection on one end or the other.

You have some great talk tracks above, but if you decide to improv: “keep it simple, (stupid)”

Short and sweet. I have a bad habit of adding fluff, in an effort to be nice, and depending on who the message is to it can be misinterpreted.

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This must be an internet new age thing as I always personally looked at horses of interest Or we knew the seller and their stock’s pedigree

When I bought our first horse we looked at well over 400 head ending up buying one that fit None of our desires, absolutely None… but was one of the best horses we were had…the horse was just too nice to pass up.

When looking at forty fifty or sixty head at a time in person it was fairly easy to go on to the next one.

Of late purchases are of stock we know their history, we are very comfortable with the these proven old stock blood lines

As a former breeder, I wanted my horses to go to the person who would most likely be the ‘perfect fit’. That to me included the potential buyer needed to be convinced that my horse was the one. I agree with the others, thank them for their time and simply say their horse isn’t ‘the one’. You do not need to be any more specific than that. I think most of us in the position of selling horses realize that some prospective buyers will walk away. If they were legitimate (not tire kickers) and it just isn’t the right fit, no hard feelings.

I sold one horse to an individual who was rather nonchalant and after purchase told me that if she didn’t work out, I would not hear from her again and her husband would just sell the horse down the road. THAT has never left me and bothers me to this day. I would have far preferred that she had passed on the mare. She was too good to end up in hands that were like ‘we’ll see and if not, there’s always more’.

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Horse buying for myself feels like dating :sweat_smile: The number of times I’ve tried to turn someone down nicely and accidentally initiated follow-up questions…

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Most everything is on Facebook nowadays. I think it makes things feel a lot more competitive when you can see how many people have asked for information in the comments. I’m also not sure where you are but there’s nowhere near me that it would be possible to look at fifty horses at a time.

This is super weird. I’d be uncomfortable, too.

most is the word as I have never used FaceBook.

We have a fairly good grasp of the bloodlines of the breed we like to work with, the history is there of a proven track record.

I only went to Los Veges on job assignments, never gambled even if the so call odds were in my favor …buying an unknown horse from some one who is also unknown is too great of a gamble for me

The few horses we have sold all were bought by people we knew who knew the horse/pony There is a fairly constant interested stream of people who would like to buy our horses.

I totally get it! I work in sales and I used to be BAD about this. But you’ve got it.

Separately to everyone else’s point to not waste the seller’s time, just remember that your time has value too.

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