Humourous sale ads...

[Medievalist]

So I admit it…I “roam” the online(and offline) sale ads hoping to find that perfect horse for the deal of a lifetime. Some of the things people say drive me nuts though…like:

“To a good home only” -What is someone going to call and say that they really want this horse, but they can only offer it a home filled with beatings and food deprivation?

Or the ones with pictures of a “Grand Prix jumper or junior hunter prospect” hanging his legs over a cross rail with glazed over eyes.

I have many others…but first do you all have any? I know…I should be studying for my finals

[OnyxThePony]

I guess my faves would always be the ‘prospects’. So…what would make this horse a great hunter prospect? (actual responses quoted) She’s TALL! (gotta be the number one reason people seem to think they have a ‘hunter or jumper prospect’). She’s not built enough for the Western classes. She’s real purty. She likes to jump (once jumped over a 1’ log when no other path was available in the field). She’s a great jumper (see above)! She’s chestnut/bay. All my other horses are Western (and this one’s what… born in England or something??). Sometimes I think all it needs to qualify as a ‘prospect’ is four legs and a tail…

[barb]

<BLOCKQUOTE class=“ip-ubbcode-quote”><font size="-1">quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by Thoroughbred_33:
[B] What they might mean is not physically outgrown, but outgrown challenge wise … that the rider is ready for a horse that is more challenging.

TB_33[/B]<HR></BLOCKQUOTE>

That is exactly what I was thinking…I have outgrown many LARGE horses!!

[Cactuskate]

My favorites:

14.5 hands = the “new” math

Dressage prospect = can’t jump a stick

Hunter prospect = pretty mover, anything remotely over 15hands is automatically 16h plus

Eventing prospect = too hot for dressage, not typey or snatchey enough for the hunter ring, runs like the wind through the pasture

Kid’s horse = dead but still warm

And on the photo pages, I actually saw someone put a sale picture in the California Horsetrader and the gelding was, no lie…peeing. They didn’t have any other picture to use!!!

[diane]

<BLOCKQUOTE class=“ip-ubbcode-quote”><font size="-1">quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by TXJumper:
This is going to sound clueless (and yes, I truly am as clueless as I seem) when someone says a horse is a good 3 or 4 foot hunter or jumper, what exactly does that mean? I looked at a lease horse and they said he was a nice 4 ft jumper. Explain please.<HR></BLOCKQUOTE>

Some horses may not be currently fulfilling their potential, for one reason or another … so you may have a horse that is currently showing at 3ft because that is where the rider is more comfortable, but they could be a phenomenal open working hunter (4ft), some greenies may look open and loose at 2’9" but if you pop them over something bigger and they have to use themselves they could be spectacular.

[Lord_Helpus]

I swear that this email just popped into my inbox as I was reading this thread:

xxxx is a xxxx hand welsh-X sorrel pony mare. SHe is a great first pony with tons of show milege.

She knows her leads but needs a trainer to work with her on them I am only asking 6,000 for a short period as i need her sold soon due to personal reasons.

(The xxx’s are mine–I replaced the name and description so I won’t get sued… LOL)

Yeah, right. This pony really knows her leads and is a perfect first pony for a child… (maybe they meant the child of a trainer? :rolleyes )

[Flash44]

That means the horse will race around because it does not know where it’s buddies are, and once it works itself into a frenzy, it will cease dodging the jumps and just torpedo over them.

[Jess]

<BLOCKQUOTE class=“ip-ubbcode-quote”><font size="-1">quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by KitBC:
[B]Bumpkin, thanks! (And to WTF and Spunky, too! LOL!)

We do have pricing on many of the ones we own outright; however, as someone mentioned above, there are trainers who prefer to make more $$. Although we are happy to work with trainers, I think it’s best when a separate commission agreement exists between the trainer & the purchaser.

Between you and me and the rest of the world, a horse deal is always open to negotiation! The worst anyone can say is no, isn’t it?

Kit Cudmore http://www.glencarry.com [/B]<HR></BLOCKQUOTE>

I saw austin when he was in NM, (I also hacked him a few times) he is SO easy and sooo fun… and VERY fancy lol, I have seen Christy’s new horse too, they get along well…

[Medievalist]

So I admit it…I “roam” the online(and offline) sale ads hoping to find that perfect horse for the deal of a lifetime. Some of the things people say drive me nuts though…like:

“To a good home only” -What is someone going to call and say that they really want this horse, but they can only offer it a home filled with beatings and food deprivation?

Or the ones with pictures of a “Grand Prix jumper or junior hunter prospect” hanging his legs over a cross rail with glazed over eyes.

I have many others…but first do you all have any? I know…I should be studying for my finals

[Sparky]

This wasn’t an ad, but it still cracked me up. My neighbor’s 4 horses get out about 6 times a week and come charging up our driveway. Yesterday, when she came to collect them, she said, “I’m at my wit’s end with the chestnut. Are you guys interested in buying him–he’s a Quarter Horse.” I said sure, and took a closer look–he only had one eye! I said, “I don’t think I’d be interested in a horse with one eye, but sometimes people are looking for a nice quiet type as a pasture mate for their horse.” She replied, “Oh, I NEVER said he was quiet!” Yeah, I’m really interested in buying your half blind, wild horse that won’t stay inside your fence! sheeeeesh

[Gayle]

The best ad that I have seen recently in our local paper actually was sort of honest. It read large pony gelding 14.2 hands 9 yrs old, probably destined for great things in the hunter/jumper ring but current owner/rider can now be found inside ballet studio.

[KitBC]

Bumpkin, thanks! (And to WTF and Spunky, too! LOL!)

We do have pricing on many of the ones we own outright; however, as someone mentioned above, there are trainers who prefer to make more $$. Although we are happy to work with trainers, I think it’s best when a separate commission agreement exists between the trainer & the purchaser.

Between you and me and the rest of the world, a horse deal is always open to negotiation! The worst anyone can say is no, isn’t it?

Kit Cudmore http://www.glencarry.com

[Sleepy]

<BLOCKQUOTE class=“ip-ubbcode-quote”><font size="-1">quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by TXJumper:
This is going to sound clueless (and yes, I truly am as clueless as I seem) when someone says a horse is a good 3 or 4 foot hunter or jumper, what exactly does that mean? I looked at a lease horse and they said he was a nice 4 ft jumper. Explain please.<HR></BLOCKQUOTE>

It means he uses all 4 feet to jump.

Sorry, I just couldn’t resist. Must be my cold meds.

[B.G.M_heidi]

Oh Portia, I’ve accumulated enough enemies for one day!!!

Yes, I only saw Peter Pletcher ride that one time, so don’t have enough context to pass that judgement. I take it all back. He is still cute though

[Merry]

I love the ads that feature a weanling or yearling with the reassuring statement, “Will mature to 16.3 hands.” REALLY? How do you know? Are you ready to refund a buyer’s money if it tops out at 15.2?

Then the western stock horse ads are a hoot. Like the ones that always say, “clips, trailers, ties.” Can’t ride it, can’t catch it in the pasture, but once you’ve roped it, it’ll tie up.

Or the other western description: “Will look at a cow.” Or, “will watch a cow.” Yeah, I get the meaning, but I just envision this horse relaxing in a lawn chair, sipping lemonade, keeping an equine eye on the neighbor’s herd of heifers.

[hobson]

<BLOCKQUOTE class=“ip-ubbcode-quote”><font size="-1">quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by Merry:

Or the other western description: “Will look at a cow.” Or, “will watch a cow.” Yeah, I get the meaning, but I just envision this horse relaxing in a lawn chair, sipping lemonade, keeping an equine eye on the neighbor’s herd of heifers.<HR></BLOCKQUOTE>

Indeed! Some friends of mine relocated to Montana and in the course of new-horse-shopping came across many horses who “look at a cow.” It took us a while to figure that one out. We are still in the dark as to “goat tie,” as in: “Will look at a cow, been to mountains, good fence or goat tie.” Anyone know?

I once went to look at a potential school horse for beginners, advertised as a “great pony club mount.” When I got on the horse he nearly killed me, bolting and bucking utterly out of control across a cornfield. It was immediately apparent that nobody in their right mind would let kids on this horse, but I recognized some real athletic ability in the bucking, and bought the horse for myself! I still have him, and now at age 14, Rex is toting a D2 pony clubber around with great panache!

[Sitting_Bull]

The best is flashy hunter type with a photo of a crooked legged beast with all the major conformation flaws known to man and a western saddle on.

[ProzacPuppy]

I like the honesty of some sellers (tho I didn’t see it too often). I responded to an add for a 3 yr old TB filly. Some really old time Texan fellow who runs a string of local racers answers. I tell him it is for a teenager as a retraining project. He tells me
" You don’t want this horse. This here is the nastiest animal God ever created."
'Nuff said about that horse. I often wonder if he ever sold her.

[B.G.M_heidi]

We were at the Kerrygold horse show in Dublin a couple of years ago and happened by a self-styled “American-type hunter” class.
Clearly recognizing the cold hard cash that many in North America will fork over for a top hunter, and hoping more earnestly that those very same North Americans would be in the audience, the class consisted of very heavy Irish Sport Horses and/or draft horses moving like my toddler’s Tonka trucks around, albeit, a hunter course. Needless to say, it was unlike any hunter class we’d ever witnessed in North America. And oh yes, Peter Pletcher was the judge. Cute he may be, but he ain’t no hunter rider

[Trixie]

You forgot “Equitation Prospect” – ugly as all get out, moves like hell, ugly jumper, but he’s big and comfortable. And the “right color.”