I can’t imagine the pain you are going through, I’m so very sorry.
Your post is a needed reminder for everyone. Please be kind to yourself and accept that this was an accident. You had no intentions or purpose or motivation that led to this awful outcome…accident.
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I just miss her so much. Yesterday I tried to go to the barn, and probably a dozen times reached over to the passenger seat to pat her or give her a scratch like I always do. Every morning I go into my closet where she slept and look for her.
The worst part is my idiot cat, who always finds where I’ve hidden her collar and carries it around, jingling the tags. I constantly look around for her after hearing this, as she’s the only one is our house who wore tags.
It just hurts so much.
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This is a rare COTH consensus of people who feel for you – take their advice and work at adjusting and knowing it was an accident and it was nobody’s “fault”.
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I am so, so sorry OP. I constantly worry about doing something like this and I know how incredibly hard it would hit me. But in echo of so many other posters, it was not your fault and all the could have, would have, should have can’t change it and will just make you feel worse. I hope in the future some lucky pet find a home with you- because this was truly an accident and it seems to me like you are a wonderful owner. ((hugs))) to you
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I am so sorry. This was an accident. Accidents resulting in death are the hardest to understand. There’s an old book called When Bad Things Happen to Good People. Maybe it could help. Please don’t beat yourself up.
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My goodness. My heart is absolutely broken for you.
I hope you will not be shy in seeking support and echo others in saying that your story will save other lives. Be strong.
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So sorry… So sorry…
At this point, there’s nothing to do but learn how to move on, and care for those who are left,
like the cat.
Ths idiot cat who finds the collar and carries it around. I suspect that you both need comfort…
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My heart broke for you as I read your post. It was a horrible accident and I am sure you are guilt ridden. However, I do not feel like you are a bad owner at all. I would also like to thank you for sharing your story. My dogs also love to go on rides and I could see how this could happen if you left a door open. Bless you and your family. I thinking of y’all.
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I am so sorry for your loss. It sounds like you gave your dog a wonderful life.
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Oh god, I’m so sorry. That - or something similar with the same result - could have happened to any of us. Almost happened to me about a year ago. You gave her a fantastic life - she knew adventures, knew what car rides were, knew about going to the barn - the best life for a dog. Who’d have imagined this as one of the down sides? Hugs. And just keep kicking.
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We got her ashes back today.
I got a small locket with a hollow inside to put some ashes in. She can still come to college with me. She can be there for my wedding (if I ever get married lol), for my kid’s birth, for my parent’s passing, and eventually she’ll be buried with me.
I also am making a quilt. There’s a small sealed pouch in the center which I will put some ashes and hair into. I’ll still be able to cuddle her, even if she’s not here, I’ll still be able to sleep with her, take her on trips, and go to horse shows.
Probably need to eat, drink or shower. Haven’t since Sunday, but I’m not hungry. Don’t know if I ever will be. Just the thought of eating makes me nauseous.
Please reach out to your parents, grandparents, friend, religious leader if you’re religious, someone. What you went through is traumatic and you need support. You deserve support. No one around you would want you to be trying to do this on your own.
And you need physical support, too. At this point, after not eating for that long, your body’s physical reactions are contributing to the nausea you feel as much as your emotions. Helping one will help the other.
It is ok to grieve. There is no timeline or rules for how you need to process that grief.
But reach out to someone.
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sending you great, huge, HUGS.
I also believe that you should seek some grief counseling to help you recover.
there won’t ever be “closure”, but you will be given tools for coping with what happened.
I’m so very sorry for the ghastly manner of your beloved dogs death. please be gentle on yourself, repercussions won’t get anyone anywhere now.
take care of yourself
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I’m so sorry. I’m going to have a horrible time sleeping tonight thinking of this myself so I can only guess what you are going through.
grandprixer - Please update us on how you’re doing. You really need to start thinking about moving forward, if you ever want to see college, wedding, etc.
Please let us know - I’m truly concerned.
StG
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I’m so sorry. Please don’t blame yourself. And please seek support in real life if you can. This sounds really hard. Your dog was obviously extremely loved.
please take care of yourself.
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The same thing happened to a friend of mine. A terrible tragic accident.
I know you hurt and I agree with talking to someone.
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I am so sorry. You never meant for that to happen. Accidents happen. Can i tell you how many times i locked my younger male dog in the basement? Please forgive yourself for not knowing. I know how badly you must be hurting.
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Be kind to yourself OP, anyone of us could be walking in your shoes. I suspect you have helped prevent this for someone else. Your story will make us look twice, check and double check. My heart goes out to you as do the tears I’ve shed for you and your girl.
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