OK responsible adults - I’m having a low point and need some emotional support from horse people.
TLDR – In order to get a house, I really can’t afford to keep my horse. I can send him back to the lady I free-leased him from 6 years ago, but its killing me. I feel so guilty even though I know this is fiscally wise thing to do. Has anyone taken a break from owning for financial reasons, gotten their affairs in order, and come back to riding? I know many have, I just need to hear some positive stories.
Due to a family circumstance, my husband and I area finally in a position to start looking for a home. We live in an incredibly expensive area and if we don’t take this opportunity now, we probably won’t own for years and years since property value is increasing 10% a year. We are both employed full-time and are paying off student loans, so although we make an OK salary, we are still in the medium range of earners in this county.
We have looked at moving to a cheaper city, but have not had luck getting jobs in other states/cities. The home ownership opportunity is to buy in an up-and-coming area and take advantage of the crazy property value hikes, low mortgage interest rates, and 1st time home buyer discount and then sell in 5 years at a profit (hopefully).
While it is exciting that home ownership is now possible, taking a really hard look at finances has made it very clear that being horse-poor and paying a mortgage do not go hand in hand. Truthfully, I’ve been barely keeping my head above water for the past few years. My horse’s increased vet, supplements, feed and farrier bills and more expensive boarding situation have been largely balanced on credit cards. We all know what a slippery slope that is. I would rather eat PB&J sandwiches for weeks at a time than have him go without, and my empty savings account and cc debt reflects that.
I have had my horse for 6 years. I got him when I lived in a different area and had cheaper rent and partially subsidized board. Technically, he is a free lease and I was able to put funds into his care (chiro, PEMF, SI injection, etc etc) It was wonderful to watch him bloom and to finally have a horse of my own after leasing and being a WS. After owning him for 2 years, we had to move to our current area for my husband’s job, but the rate increase in pay just barely keeps up with CoL. Husband had a side gig bartending which created a slush fund and long-term savings, but COVID halted that. I All my salary goes to covering regular bills, paying down debt and all the rest of it goes to the horse.
I tried to cut some corners with a cheap farrier and cheapest boarding barn in a daily commute distance but paid the price for that with chronic abscess from bad footing, dirty stalls, and laminitis. A cheap barn is never cheap when you have to supplement additional hay and shavings since they don’t provide enough.
I moved from that situation to a better (more expensive) barn, new (more expensive) farrier, and new vet. Horse is doing great, but his costs have effectively increased by 40% He is now sound and getting back to work and looks better than ever. All the walking, groundwork and equi-bands for rehab have made him more balanced and stronger in his core. He isn’t back 100% to work, but well on the way there.
Either way he isn’t a sales prospect. The woman I got him from 6 years ago is willing to take him back if I pay shipping. She knows him and his quirks, I am sharing all xrays and bloodwork and farrier recommendations. She is being terrific about it. I know this is a great “out” but I still feel like I am letting him down by sending him back. I have so much of my heart in him. I’ve rehabbed him from 2 different injuries – months of just quiet hand walks together really getting to know each other. He has taught me so much and is such a huge part of my life. I spend all day at work waiting until I can leave the desk and hang out with him. I’ve been able to become a better rider because of him, and was able to finally compete because of him. I will be forever grateful to him.
I know horses will always be there, but I don’t want to let go of THIS horse. I know that once he is gone I have no control over him. We have all heard the horror stories, but I’m also aware that he could end up with someone even better – a better rider, or someone with more money to spoil him. I have racked my brain trying to find a low-cost way to keep him, but I can’t avoid the fact that he is a high maintenance horse right now I can’t afford him (arguably a financial planner would tell me that I never was able to afford him).
Its also become clear that I have to be fair to my SO. Its not fair to ask him to put every cent he makes to a mortgage while I put $1400 a month into my horse. He has been supportive for so long because he knows how important horses are to me, but we are closer to 40 than 30 and need to start thinking about our joint futures. Buying property now is a first step in building a nest egg that we need and I can finally start making progress in paying down debt.
Notice has been given at the barn, vet and farrier have been notified, shippers have been called. He is going back. In 30 days I don’t know what I will do with myself! I am at the barn for about 2 hours a day. I know I can fill the time with exercising I haven’t had time for, or catch up on reading, but how do you fill the horse void?
All of my (non-horsey) family and friends say this is a no-brainer. That I should have sent him back years ago. It’s a smart move in my head, but not in my heart. Have you ever taken a break from horses for a financial reason?
If you have read to the end of this rambling and emotional post – thank you. Things have moved fast and I’m still trying to wrap my head around it.
