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Is My Trainer Blowing Me Off?

WOW. That is amazing! A bombproof 15 year old with all their tack would definitely be way more than $5k in my area. I think your neck of the woods is definitely more my style. Out here is a lot of dressage and hunter jumper style riding which is not what I do.

Join AREA 1, Horse Tack, and Other Equipment Advertisements – in New England, etc.

There is a black horse for sale named Jack in " Horses For Sale or Lease, Cape Cod and the Islands" that seems to meet your requirements. $5600.

And I see two horses for sale in Douglas MA that fit your description and both are sub 5k.

And an andalusian with a resume, at 23k.

No affiliation with any, just was browsing FB now. If you want to DM me your FB, I can send you the links.

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Thank you! Off to find those groups right now @beowulf!

There is a Facebook group called “looking for an all-around pleasure horse.” It’s almost all AQHA or APHA and mostly midwestern sellers. However, there is a regular sprinkling of horses for sale in New England. I just did a quick scroll of the first 20 or so horses listed and one is in CT and one in NY.

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thank you! will join that group too.

Same here.
For your budget you could get a VERY nice QH with potential to go to Congress.
For your relatively simple Wants you can halve your budget & find something very nice.
Examples:
*Registered Halflinger - rides & drives - asking $6K - Seller was told to ask less by Those Who Know
*3yo Appendix QH for Jr to show WP & Huntseat just bought for 1/3 your budget
*Registered American Dutch Harness 11yo gelding - asking $10K, got laughed at

ETA: just saw your post with NE location.
As I don’t know that market at all (Midwest here), I’ll just ask:
Are you so unsure of your own ability to choose a horse that suits you that Trainer input is a Must?
A Seller willing to go out on trail with you could resolve the issue & get what you want.

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It’s not that I’m unsure about my own ability, I just know I am not an expert and there are things my trainer would see/ask that may not occur to me and I want to make the right choice, as much as possible. I can w/t/c a horse English and Western. Can take it out on the trail too, but I have a trainer because she is more knowledgeable than me. It has been frustrating that she is too busy to go see anything I find, but I may just need to take the advice of others here and go try horses, put a deposit down if I like them, then hope my trainer can make room for me. She only had three days available to go look with me between now and end of November last time I asked. (Which seems unreasonable to me, but she IS very busy.)

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Again, I think you need to talk to her about this.

My trainer always like this approach - I look around and go look at things. Take a knowledgeable friend along to be a second set of eyes. Video anything I really like. Discuss the thing I like with the trainer and if the trainer agrees with it being a good choice then schedule a time for all of us to go look at it again.

This has me (and my friend) weeding out the things that are obviously not really what I want and saving the trainer’s time for the things that seem like a good prospect for my needs.

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I will do that, thank you for your sound and helpful advice. :smiling_face_with_three_hearts:

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Move out near me and I’ll let you ride him while you search! :joy:

I know you’d find a horse pretty quickly with that budget out here that made all your dreams come true.

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Good grief, she can’t possibly be that busy. I would assume if you have one or two locked down she can wiggle free some time. If not, how will she ever be able to fit you in as a student when you’re riding again?

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I would not tell a client that either. Every penny counts in this business.
And mid 5 figures isn’t exactly chump change either.
there have been Derby winners going for less!

So yes, this gives the impression the trainer is not too invested in your horselife.
Maybe time to shop for a new one, while you shop for a horse.

Due to the nature of the horse biz in the US, I don’t think you can avoid travel unless you have built a network of trusted professionals.

I would not outright dismiss imports. A guy I knew bought himself a nice little mare with good milleage on her, fairly tallented for mid 4 digits form an import barn, but that was in the late 90s I believe. He paid much less for the horse than comparative prospects bred in the US.

It also depends a little what you are looking at, what your personal skills are, and it sounds like you are not equipped to solo the purchase.

What was the situation at the old barn, if you don’t mind me asking? Is there a chance to go and ride there again?

I think your trainer is easing you off her client list, to be honest. 2 months are a long time between rides.

ETA after reading the replies:
have you checked with TB rehoming groups?
A friend got a nice one from the Maker’s Mark center, there are other ones around as well. Occasionally I window shop CANTER USA, but one has to keep in mind that track soundeness/manners are different from the hobby variety.
Standard breds are also a nice option for the hobbiist, and I had a FB aquaintance offer to find me an Armish bred dutch coach horse (If I remember right)

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This seems like a very real possibility, the more I hear about this. OP’s budget is more than healthy for what they are asking for – something isn’t adding up.

Maybe the trainer doesn’t take OP seriously, or doesn’t view OP as one of her main clients – more of an independent/occasional person who comes into her orbit once a blue moon…?

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I am getting into those moods these days were I feel more and more like ‘oh, what the heck, let’s see what happens’ and ask the blunt question.
Oh, heytrainer lady, Seems you are not to eager to take my money anymore.
Are you fiering me?

But I come from a long line of people with minimal filter.

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I have been a pretty regular client taking lessons twice a week for a year+. BUT, I am not interested in showing and she is definitely into shows. Compared to her other clients I am not spending a ton of money. Their horses are way more expensive than my budget and they show at the top levels. They take more lessons and also have horses in regular training. @beowulf

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I am going to try what @trubandloki suggested and just check in with her about the horse search and how she thinks things are going. I don’t want to burn any bridges, but I too appreciate clear and direct communication.

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Good luck there.
But do expect a broadway show in terms of tap dancing…

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You know, this is a genuine life skill – one I wish I learned earlier rather than being a passive doormat for most of my 20s and even part of my 30s. Now when I think something is suspect, I just ask straight up - saves me a lot of guesswork and avoids the possibility of me making the wrong assumptions too.

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My larger question is, why this trainer and what is she training you at? Why do you need this particular trainer? Is it perhaps time to go barn shopping and find a new trainer and a new lease?

As far as your trainers motivations, it’s probably pointless to delve too deep. I’ve watched trainers ghost clients. The reason could be:

Personal financial etc issues outside horses

Health, mental health, substance abuse issues

Poor time management skills, overwhelmed

Decision to go in new direction with a new program,

Changing priorities wants to train for resale versus lessons, etc

Wants to quietly shed old clients that don’t fit new business model

Doubts about client as a person or as a client or as a rider.

You will never really know. But that doesn’t matter. Your current trainer is unwilling or unable to support your current horse needs. Start looking for a new barn and new trainer.

BTW, the horse you describe would cost under $10,000 in Canada right now and would likely be a QH or Appendix with an “English” build. The 15 hand size range is too big for English ponies and too small for hunters, and is common in QH.

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I have seen some nice ones for sale in Canada and would so love to go look. I’m in NH and parts of Canada are not that far from me. Unfortunately with the border closed that’s off the table for now.

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