There aren’t many eventing programs that have lesson horses these days, and even fewer who will allow you to go x-country schooling on a horse you aren’t at least leasing. You’ll have more luck once you can trailer in your own horse for lessons and x-country schooling.
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Seriously. I still remember from one of my first times x-country schooling - there was a slight dip (maybe 4-6" slope on either side?) crossing over a dirt road several strides out from a very straightforward BN jump on otherwise level ground. I didn’t think anything of it and cantered right up to it like normal, and then riding through the dip almost popped me out of the tack before I even got near the fence! It felt so much weirder than it seemed like it should have just from looking at it, and instilled a whole new level of respect for even mild changes in terrain. Also made me feel pretty dumb, but that part never seems to end no matter how much I learn 
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I think this is a brilliant idea for the OP.
Find a pony club. It will introduce you to trainers and if you are lucky, it will help you find a ride for your horse to lessons with those trainers.
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This is so true! I knew a show jumper who liked to say, “Prelim eventing would be so easy for me! Dressage? A couple of circles! And the jumps are so small! I could do it tomorrow and win.” Yeah, no.
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Ooh good idea. I may post there and link to this post.
I remembered! I’ve seen a few of your replies to various posts over the years 
you should have been my first message!
That’s actually a realllllllly clutch piece of info you shared about Jessica… Because honestly I’m running into such an issue with everyone I was going to reach out to posting on their socials about heading to FL in the coming week(s).
Does she have a website or preferred method of contact? Lauren’s place is close to me I believe.
2000% agree with your entire post. I did low level trials (pony club equivalent) as a tween so trust me, I hear and completely agree with everything you’re saying. Not trying to fluff my tail feather at my unrecognized mini-trial experience from 15 years ago (lol) - just trying to express that I see the full picture in terms of risk and the gap in expertise (which is why I’m trying to supplement where my current trainer’s knowledge ends with someone else’s wisdom) that you, and others, are painting.
If she is genuinely unhappy about me seeking out specialized training and knowledge that she does not possess, I’ll need to take a serious look at my goals and if she’s the right person to help me get to where I want to be.
This is valuable. Was more so thinking of starting relationship and lessons with goals along the lines of refining flatwork and dressage maneuvering that my horse has yet to learn, but this will be good to keep in mind in terms of setting expectations for myself.
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I don’t personally know her, but I’ve really wanted to do lessons or a clinic with her. Many of my friends have and I’ve loved every interview I’ve ever heard with her.
Here’s her IG that also links to her FB:
Middle TN in winter is a freakin’ ghost town for lessons, so I feel your pain. Most of the people I took lessons from while in the area are either no longer teaching or no longer in the state.
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Hey now, come back over to Middle TN and we can have a ‘weenie eventing’ party!
But on a serious note, appreciate you! I’m going to shoot her a message and follow.
Middle TN is such a ghost town for anything clinic or community building for the various horse communities. It’s really annoying - there’s a good amount of horse people around but there’s suuuuuch a pretentious attitude towards venturing outside of one’s private farm…
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I hear you! The horse community is so odd there, because it’s not small at all, but it’s really insular. I met some absolutely wonderful people, but it wasn’t easy and most of them were fellow transplants and eventers to boot. That’s honestly why I got back into eventing.
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You need to meet some eventers and get their recommendations. Join organizations or even Facebook groups, attend events as a spectator or a volunteer.
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Also jumps on downhill slopes & uphill slopes. Spreads on slopes. Ski jumps on slopes. At BN.
I had a hunter/jumper background, very successful jumper C rated shows, when I got the chance to do eventing. Thought this would be a smooth switch as I was already good over 3’6".
Honestly the h/j/e background was very little help to learning to ride XC. Learning XC jumping was like starting over. The pace, ground, obstacles, everything, needed a completely different skill set and mental assessment.
Please do not fall for the h/j/e trainers who think they can teach eventing without having learned eventing themselves. And having evented up the levels. It’s kind of like going from ice skating to skiing. A few things about the environment are familiar, but they are two very different sports.
H/j/e trainers who haven’t gone up the levels of eventing themselves too often don’t know what they don’t know.
Plus I’ve seen some eliminations on XC from the lack of true knowledge from the rider’s h/j/e trainer. Bad advice on riding an obstacle to stupidly not knowing the rules, including that they can’t coach from the sidelines while their rider is on course. And then being peeved about it.
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I have made it politely clear to every trainer I’ve ever worked with that while I may consider them to be my ‘primary’ trainer, I don’t belong to any trainer. Ocassionally I may visit another trainer, and I am glad to let them know when and why. If that doesn’t work for them, let me know, and no hard feelings when I find someone else to be the ‘primary’ trainer.
I’ve just found that it is better for me not to get stuck inside just one stream of instruction, one mindset. It is very helpful to hear things from a different perspective.
One of them said quite fairly that while of course that was my prerogative, his one reservation was me getting conflicting instruction from another trainer. If it wasn’t a conflict with his teaching, he was ok with it. I assured him that I would take that to heart.
On the eventing side, yep it is completely normal to work with different trainers on different aspects of the sport. Trailering out and clinics, etc.
Perhaps because it is a much smaller sport, in many parts of the country with fewer eventing trainers more spread out, it’s not uncommon for eventers who consider a trainer as ‘their’ trainer, to board elsewhere, due to distance. I have known of a fair few eventers (at times me included) who were trailering periodically from 20 minutes, to one to two hours, to a session with their trainer. So obviously many eventers do tend to train themselves independently to a certain degree.
Also some people have a regular trainer but want to go to more distant events that their trainer doesn’t attend. In those cases it’s not unusual to do a course-walk (coaching) with another trainer, because they are there and your trainer is not.
On your h/j/e trainer side, maybe you can carefully ask around the people who know your trainer and get an idea how she might respond to the idea. But as others have said, in the end you have to chat with her honestly about your plans. Sounds like you are prepared for all eventualities, if it comes to it.
You might want to approach this more as a ‘trial’ interest for a certain time period, to see if you enjoy eventing and want to continue it – or not. Maybe tell your h/j trainer that you are thinking of doing some eventing for a year, and then deciding if you like it enough to continue.
Eventing is not everyone’s cup of tea, once they try it. Plus, it is one of the most demanding horse sports in terms of time and effort to prepare for 3 disciplines, especially if you want to be competitive. There is no certainty that you will want to continue.
You could tell your trainer that after you feel you’ve gotten a feel for eventing for a year or however long, you can make a decision on how you want to spread your horse time going forward.
I’ve seen a fair few h/j/e riders give eventing a try. Often starting with a clinic. A lot of them find that they can do it and they enjoy it, but they prefer the h/j/e world and it is too demanding to try to do eventing as well.
But everyone can decide for themselves how they want to spend their time & money with their horse.
100% agree.
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This is really good advice and a great way to start the discussion with the current trainer. It’s practical, and diplomatic.
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Honestly, if you are just taking lessons and boarding with an hj trainer who has clients that regularly goes to away shows, well to put it bluntly, you are pocket change… Which is all to say, it’s less likely to be a problem.
Also, this trainer probably knows dressage trainers, but she may not know them well enough to give a recommendation. Or tbh, she’s from a generation that is not terribly well rounded, never did much more than ride in a program, in her discipline and only in that discipline… and then became a trainer. That’s uncomfortably common in the hj world, it’s getting more common in dressage and eventers shouldn’t get too smug, because they appear to be next on the list… (But that’s a whole 'nother thread!)
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OP, if you like your current barn and options are limited in your area, I think treading lightly is probably the best course of action here. I am mostly coming from h/j world, but I have dabbled in a bit of everything - as I have mostly kept my horses at home and been a ship-in, which has given me a bit more freedom than being 100% “in” with any one trainer. Even with that being said, I have felt a bit of a bristling from some trainers when I have mentioned going to a clinic 
I don’t know if it has changed or I just got lucky because in the past I was able to successfully ride with two trainers basically simultaneously: one was on the road more than the other, so I just picked and chose what shows made sense for me. I can’t imagine finding a similar situation today that would be ok by any h/j trainer. I hate that it’s this way, but it certainly is true in my area that you must be incredibly diplomatic to pull off something like this. If your trainer is on the road a lot at h/j shows, I think that is your angle.
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I’m in middle tn, and I would highly recommend Lauren romanelli, stones River which does pony club or even Jennie hogan with dressage.
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So, I’m a jumper rider and grew up in HJ-land. For the last decade+ I have boarded with and train with eventers and it is a verrrrry different culture, as you have noticed, and others have mentioned. I am now used to the idea of riding with a variety of different trainers as needed- my own trainer rides with straight dressage people, or jumper trainers, and so on, and I very often ride with them, too. Eventers generally have their own rigs and are DIY, in general.
But H/J barns are different, as generally (from small to large operations) everyone is in the barn’s program- they ride and show and ship with the trainer(s), who have sometimes complete control over the horses’ care, and no one else. This can create a very clicque-y atmosphere, or at the very least an insular one, and can mean that riding with outside trainers is seen as an insult to the barn’s trainer(s). Other clients can get pissy about it, too, because the insularity ends up meaning that people who look outside of that program are seen as criticizing both the barn and the other clients.
I was talking to a jumper trainer who I am hoping to have help me at shows this year (on those occasions when I can’t convince my eventer trainer to come stand around all day waiting for my classes to go because we don’t have ride times ), and I unintentionally offended her when I recommended she get in touch with an eventing trainer who is my trainer’s current go-to, and who I ride with when I can (she’s great). The HJ trainer has a horse who came to her as a bit of a mental wreck from very bad riding and management so he’s been a longterm project and really, really challenging. She’s done a great job with this guy, but this eventing trainer is really good at those types of cases, so I said she might want to ride with this person to get some new ideas.
Oooh boy, did she take it wrong! I had to spend a dumb amount of time digging myself out of that, since she took it as me saying: you suck and can’t ride and need this other trainer’s help. That wouldn’t have happened between eventers, but I have not been in a HJ program for many years now and forgot that aspect of the culture. All of this is to say: be careful and tactful, but in the end you need to do what is best for you and your horse and your riding.
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OP- from someone who has done this - not offensive- I did get questioned on -why. (but I keep my horses at home but am competitve in h/j) who entered into low level eventing- find clinics, event camps etc. I have found eventers super friendly and helpful. When I drifted over 2 years ago (last year being my first full year eventing), I attended/attend as many clinics as I can find. My h/j trainer was extremeley supportive and loves my videos He is very proud. I have found that I can apply what I learn at eventing clinics and my regular trainer and find what works.
I also buddied up with a friend(s) to show. I actually do not have a trainer at shows, but at a lot of the rated shows, the clincians are there and willing to coach (it is very different than h/j coaching -depedning on your program- as far as- get your butt to course walks, get to the ring etc).
The hardest transition for us (my horse is very very brave jumper) was getting his brain - sometimes we are going past the jumps xc, sometimes we jump them, sometimes there are 3 right next to each other and we are aiming for the tiniest (ha ha). My kid brings my hunters xc schooling with me, they love it as well.
I did little local shows which were so so helpful. Last summer we did Jump Start at the KYP and that was such a thrill. I knew that if we got around KY, he “understood” the job, at the lower level I did (he was 5th out of 17 ish). I am in no way an experienced eventer. As others stated, terrain is a thing and learning to ride it. But I do pick people’s brains, attend clinics, xc school when I can with budies or grab lessons when a clincian is doing xc.
A big part of my low level “sucess” (he qualified for AECs this year already ) is my horse is game. I jumped my first ditch (Novice size) at event camp with a trainer talking me through it- horse says- Oh- you point I jump. I am a tried and true H/J, but eventing has made us so happy and is so much fun. I am definitley a convert (I still dabble in the jumpers and my kid rides my hunters).
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No, even if she is willing to give up a weekend to come to events with you (unlikely due to the cost differential) she won’t even know the rules and will likely get you eliminated or warned off for doing something like coaching from the sidelines or a tack violation or warming your horse up. She likely realizes this herself btw.
Eventers usually have coaches or instructors, hunter people have trainers. It’s a completely different financial structure and the expectations for both clients and service providers are very different. As well as how they want the horses to go and people to ride. If you want to event you will need to find someone to coach you, If you want to stay at your barn then talk to the trainer and tell her, but expect that her teaching style and expectations are going to directly conflict with, say, your dressage trainer. If you’re not comfortable enough to reconcile those styles yourself it won’t work…
As far as not knowing any dressage trainers, the hunter trainer where I am has told me there are “no good dressage trainers in this area”. There are VERY good trainers. She just doesn’t like how they ride or how the horses go and considers it poor training due to her very different expectations for how her horses go. Most, not all, hunter people consider long-and-low about the pinnacle of dressage training and that anything else is counter productive. They hate to see a horse shorten it’s stride or be overly forward for any reason, lol.
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One more thought on the difference between jumping XC and jumping in the arena is the way horse & rider face up to solid obstacles that don’t fall. Many with no “air” in the front facing the approaching horse (just a solid block of logs, stones, whatever). Both horse and rider need to approach the jump in a certain way that eventers don’t even remember learning, back when they started. The dynamics are not what h/j teaches, IMO.
An idea that “jumping is jumping” is dangerous when it comes to cross-country. Fortunately the lower levels are designed to be more forgiving, and the rate of serious accidents is low. But there is no reason to increase the risk with a trainer who doesn’t know what they don’t know about terrain and solid obstacles. Just imo.
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Seconding this. XC teaches you to ride in a way that I can only describe as forward but defensive. Lucinda Green describes it as the “Ready for trouble” seat, such that if your horse slams on the brakes/runs out/throws in an extra stride/makes things interesting by looking at a fence, etc., you’re not going to be dangerously unseated. It’s completely different from how you jump in an arena.
Good event horses also have an innate sense of self-preservation and their riders have to learn to not micromanage—if you bomb a stride into an oxer in the ring because you’re fiddling, poles will come down. That safety net isn’t there out on XC, especially once the fences go up. My lessons are full of my trainer yelling “let him figure it out!” because my job is to keep the canter rhythm and keep my horse straight, and his job is to figure out what the heck he’s doing with his feet and when.
It’s just generally a very different world from counting strides on flat ground between fences that fall down, and the disciplines don’t have an equal application one way versus the other. I know plenty of eventers that can (and do) dabble in the hunters and do pretty well for themselves, but I don’t know a lot of hunter riders/trainers who can do the same in eventing (unless they grew up eventing and already have that background).
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