Well, first my S.O. gets pneumonia, ends up in the ER which cancelled my June trip to see my parents. Then I wrecked my knee…waiting for my Aug 1st appointment…then my Mom died on July 30 which is where I have been for 2 weeks (had to cancel my knee appt again). Flew back here last night after hyperventilating on the plane at having to leave my family and therefore I am “over” this summer. Excuse the persistant whining but I’ve had it. Ready to move on but so darn teary-eyed. What a year. 
I want to add my condolences – and agree that you are not whining – you have a sincere reason to feel down and to grieve. Let us help in any way we can.
Pam
Most of us here have lost people we love. I lost my father when I was 16. A wise shrink said, when I asked how long I was going to feel so depressed, “As long as it takes.” We can’t legislate our feelings about death. I just know that after a while, the memories become primarily the good ones - about the good times - and the sadness becomes tempered by sweetness.
My thoughts are with you.
My deep condolences on your loss.
Don’t think twice about “whining” here. It’s a huge strain, physically and emotionally, to be injured and have difficulty even getting across the room, then to have such a fundamental loss on top of that – well, you have every right and need to let it out. Thankfully our little virtual community is here for the good times and the bad. Hopefully, the good times will show themselves again for you soon.
Thank you all for your kind words. This has just been one big downslope. But my memories keep me positive. I do pretty good most of the day and then it just “hits” me. But with friends like you I don’t feel so isolated being 1000 miles from home and family. And I can hear my Mom’s words: “You are just at the bottom of your circle…you will be coming back up again soon.”
I am reading books which seem to help: my favorite so far is “The Courage to Grieve” by Judy Tatelbaum. It is easy to read and helps me to know the process and how to “finish” my relationship with my Mom (which has always been loving and wonderful)and my grief. Not that it will ever end but at least I am able to recognize the phases.
My Mom was a character…very strong and kind; always my best supporter and had a wonderful way of knowing how to give me courage and determination after any disaster especially horse related. She could pick me up, dust me off and somehow plant strength and “attackmode” in me that I will never forget. Her laughter and sense of humor were the best…I feel lucky that I was able to get her laughing good even in the last months. Two days after her memorial service was my birthday. It was bittersweet for sure but I knew she was “there” powering me through.
I am very lucky too to have your support. Hopefully all these kind words that you have shared with me may also help others when they need it too. Thank you all.
Dear Hunterested,
So sorry to hear of your Mom’s passing. Please allow yourself the time and space to grieve in whatever manner suits your needs best. If you’re at all fond of reading, there was a book I found helpful called “Motherless Daughters: The Legacy of Loss” by Hope Edelman. Although its primary focus is the difficult mother-daughter relationship, there are words of wisdom and solace for everyone in this book.
Very best wishes,
Joan S.
Boy, Life dishes stuff out in big doses, huh? I’m so sorry for all the troubles you’ve been going through lately.
I cannot even conceive of losing my mom, yet I know someday it’s inevitable. My thoughts are with you.
“Charter Member of the Baby Greenie Support Group of North America”
Well, first my S.O. gets pneumonia, ends up in the ER which cancelled my June trip to see my parents. Then I wrecked my knee…waiting for my Aug 1st appointment…then my Mom died on July 30 which is where I have been for 2 weeks (had to cancel my knee appt again). Flew back here last night after hyperventilating on the plane at having to leave my family and therefore I am “over” this summer. Excuse the persistant whining but I’ve had it. Ready to move on but so darn teary-eyed. What a year.
I’m so sorry to hear about your mother…please don’t apologize for your “whining”…you need to vent and grieve and we’re all here to help you any way we can!!
I hope that you are at the top of it again very soon. And in the meantime remember that it is okay to cry, and to grieve, and to feel all the awful emotions. I am so sorry about the loss of your mother and I hope that you know that we are always here for you.
This BB is a group of really wonderful people.
I am so sorry to hear about your mother.
I have had three friends who lost their fathers quite suddenly in a two week span.
This has not been a good summer at all for you, and I hope that things will get better.
I’m so sorry. Losing people from our lives is so hard. We’ll all be thinking of you.
First my brother in-law runs himself and my sister into dire financial straits. They borrow big from my mom (big as in 50k). They then go Chapter 11 bankrupt the day before Christmas Eve. What more could happen? Well he hid the fact he kept a roping horse and went to a rodeo 2 days after Christmas, drooped dead off the horse from a heart attack in the box. No insurance. $40k IRS lien on the house plus 3 mortgages. You think you got trouble?
Mom died less then one year later. I cannot believe this helped her any.
Whatever your grief there are those with worse. Death is a part of life so live your life.
My late grandmother used to say “Never look back, You’ll see what’s chasing you” good words to live by.
From Allergy Valley USA
I wouldn’t call it whining. I think you have some legitmate “life sucks” issues here. Glad you could at least vent a little here. Isn’t that what cyberfriends are for?
I’m sorry for the loss of your mother. And I hope you can find the space to grieve in a way that is appropriate for you. I found a little book somewhere called Good Grief, not of the Charles M Schultz variety mind you. You might find it of value.
As far as the teary-eyed condition, that’s just part of the process. You will be on the other side of it all before you know it. 
“The older I get, the better I used to be.”
I am so sorry to hear of your loss. I lost my Mom a few years ago (she was only 56, far too young) and remember the sharpness of the grief like it was yesterday.
My best friend sent me this poem when I was grieving. For some reason it gave me some comfort, and so I am passing it on to you. It is from The Little Prince, , Antoine de Saint-Exupery.
In one of the stars
I shall be living
In one of them
I shall be laughing
And so it will be
as if all the stars
are laughing
when you look up
at the sky at night
and there is sweetness
in the laughter of all the stars
and in the memories
of those you love
with all my sympathy,
Susan
My thoughts and prayers are with you.
You are not whining! Whining is something one does when one’s needs are not immediately acceded to. You are grieving and no doubt depressed more so than you were before you got the news about your mom.
Please allow your cyberfriends here to help you grieve if you feel comfortable doing so. Many of us have lost one or both parents, some suddenly, some long expected. We would be pleased and honored to listen and tell you our stories.
My deepest sympathy on the loss of your mother.
~Kryswyn~
“Always look on the bright side of life, de doo, de doo de doo de doo”
The years teach you that when all these awful things gang up on you, if you can just tread water and not sink when this cycle is past you will make progress.
The tough part is not to let it all drag you backwards or down in the dumps. Your Mom loved you and wanted nothing more for you than that you be happy and healthy so to honor her memory and fulfill her wishes you hold on. She spent her life nurturing her family and she would want you all to go on with her love over your shoulder guiding you. She is always a part of you because you are made from her flesh and blood and she will live as long as you all remember her and fulfill her dreams for you.
What a h### of a summer you’ve had. I’m so very sorry for you. Don’t ever worry about “whining.” Whining is when your boots don’t yet fit, this is grieving, and you’re entitled to do all you need.
What a nasty series of events…life does definitely suck at times…and places to vent are sometimes hard to come by…hope you are feeling a little relief now!
