OP, I’d advise talking to someone about your feelings and finding the mental tools to move past what happened. Which was completely inappropriate.
Alas, some men think that they either have a license to approach women clients or just want to “try it on” - shame on the trainer for not taking action. At some high-end barns one needs to be very situationally aware. I’ve found a well-placed elbow is somewhat of a deterrent at times.
Glad you’re out of that place.
Oh, I don’t tolerate it. But people are people, and sometimes elbows make it clear that you’re not someone to be trifled with. One doesn’t have to throw an elbow to have it be a signal that you’re not willing to be “that” friendly.
Not sure where this belongs, but wanted to share this gift article from the Washington Post on a predator in polo world:
I was fortunate as a young adult polo rat that the older alum from my university I worked horses for after college was a decent guy and was not a harrassing jerk. Still, I was aware of plenty of questionable or downright rude comments about the young women grooms/riders made by other men who played in the same polo leagues.
Wow. That’s a shocking article.
Well, it is and it isn’t shocking. What interested me was that the power dynamics, age difference, and victim manipulation/grooming were the same as abusers in any horse related discipline use. Just a different setting. I really feel for any young person who gets caught up in this particular toxic stew.
Ugh!
Honestly, the part that surprised me the most was that the guy was giving the girls money. Not just an extra horse to ride or whatever.
Ick.
That part makes me sad and sick. The girls mentioned in the WaPo article were as young as 16.
I’d like to know exactly what are ‘women under 18’. That jumped out at me. And I’m a WaPo subscriber. But that was a record scratch for me.
Anyone who posted the i stand with George was undermining safe sport and victim shaming, I was shocked at some of the riders I formerly respected sided with him. Makes me question their morals.
Yeah. That was a weird semantic choice.
There’s a LOT of money connected to key people in this story. I can’t help but wonder how much pressure was brought to bear before this article went to print, in an effort to do any damage control they possibly could.
I also can’t help but notice how silent social media is about this story right now.
@arktos19 thanks for sharing the article. I personally didn’t find it that shocking. Clearly Mr. Gobin felt confident that he could do whatever he wanted and that his status in his sport would protect him from consequences. Many other elite male horsemen have had the same concept.
I am, however, a bit shocked by what happened to tjmlcharlantini and the fact that the employer responded so irresponsibly.
@Amberley to me it doesn’t quite come across quite right to lump immigrants in with criminals. I think most employers would consider a job applicant with a criminal background to fall into a separate category than other potential employees. I also want to point out that it is illegal to have hiring practices that discriminate against immigrants.
Also–I would ask–are you suggesting that men from non-marginalized groups are less likely to be predators? This is a 2700+ post thread about various modestly to extremely privileged and well respected men who turned out to be predators.
Yeah… I understand… but given his connections… this is pretty stunning. The WaPo article talked about the plaintiff suing over events that happened in 2021, both at his private farm and apparently at Great Meadow. Meanwhile, Great Meadow Foundation awarded him a significant contract that year, although they already had a longstanding relationship with him, having first hired him in 2007.
Sooooo… I’m pretty shocked given all the puzzle pieces involved. And wondering if liability and lawsuits related to his actions might spread beyond JG himself, to associated entities.
Wasn’t Flintridge sued as a result of JW’s behavior?
All one need do to blow that premise out of the water is to look at the long list of clergy and police who have been found guilty of abuse.
Just looked up the issue of the Flintridge Lawsuit. They were sued and apparently reached a settlement in January of 2024.
Thanks for posting this link. I had forgotten about this lawsuit. For those of us who grew up riding in SoCal in the JW era, reading the article dredged up a whole lot of memories.
Good for Gigi.
Definitely good for her. This has been a long legal process.
I don’t know anything about the finances behind Flintridge. I wonder if insurance would have covered legal expenses and a settlement like this?
The Horse Girls Podcast just released a fantastic conversation with Kendall Bourgeois about creating healthier environments for equestrian athletes. It includes a very real discussion about SafeSport. Hope that everyone is able to watch/listen. Both Nana and Kendall are terrific and so real and relatable.
The conversation can be watched/listened to on you-tube or listening only on Spotify. I have included links for both.
Putting an END To Abuse in Equestrian Sports with Kendall Bourgeois -Ep #7
Putting an END To Abuse in Equestrian Sports with Kendall Bourgeois
I’m not familiar with how insurance would work in such circumstances. But since Flintridge was and is a club with paid membership, I’d think there’d be some sort of coverage.
Holy generalizations, Batman!
I’m not disputing the situations you’ve described exist.
I just don’t think they are universal.
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