Yes, it’s just you. This is very disrespectful. She’s just trying to look out for her daughter.
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I don’t think we have any pony clubs around here…I have never heard of it. We are in the New England area
I started riding as an adult, and after a few years (and a barn switch), my eyes have been opened up to the less-than-ideal nature of my first lesson barn.
I would consider 3 falls in a lesson a definite red flag; especially for a young person. IMO the trainer should have gotten on to school after the first stop.
You definitely are in the right to step in after the second fall, and even after the first, just to check in with your daughter. Especially if she is a bit shy, it might be good if you take a minute to let the adrenaline wear off and then you ask her yourself how she’s feeling. She can still be the one to talk to her trainer, but you can help her script that conversation, and she’ll have parental authority backing her up if the trainer pushes back.
I’d also recommend the pony club manuals for both you and your daughter, they have a lot of really good and practical advice on safety and ideal practices for how things “ought” to be done; and if your daughter is going to become a horsewoman, she may be spouting some very odd vocabulary soon, and you might appreciate a translation resource.
I know my mom did, and she actually started taking lessons at the same time as me!
You can often find them at tack shops, and also on amazon. Start with the D club manual btw, that confused me at first.
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Thanks for sharing your experience. First two falls were at a walk or trot speed I think. 3rd one was from a canter.
I cannot believe I let her get in the 3rd time.
Thanks! She is not a big reader but I bet she would love to read these!
https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=om2o5c-2byY
What most of us think of as a stop. We have a very good example of a prop, many dirty stops or refusals, some riders jumped out of the tack, possibly one chip and a couple of crashes. And I always thought European riders were better jumpers than we are. Ha!
OP with your further information no lesson horse should stop and duck it’s head on the flat and dump a rider. Jumping they may stop if they lose their rhythm and lose track of where they need to jump, and that’s something that can be used as a teachable moment as the rider sets the pace and can influence stride length. Rider focus and balance are important as well. We all have heard of or met a horse that loves to jump at liberty and will jump a pasture fence, but there are many more that need the guidance and cooperation of a rider to be happy.
The instructor was not using the moment to deal with the disobedience or she most certainly would have apologized to your daughter for removing her and gotten that bigger more experienced rider up after fall two if not fall one.
Ponies can be wily little jerks and as mentioned before this one needs a grazing rein. A vet check might be in order as well to rule out pain.
I hope your DDs feeling better and her confidence isn’t affected. I know mine was as I was dumped badly by a larger horse and I am much more relaxed on a large pony or hony, slang for a really short animal bigger than 14.2 hands. Closer to the ground you know.
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OP, glad you found this board and asked your questions. Some of the other posters must not have experienced being a fish out of water in the barn environment. I’ve ridden my whole life, but life in a training barn is a whole different animal, and I’ve also found myself with questions about things that others assume are common knowledge. I’m sorry some of the replies on here were not offered with grace and the knowledge that we all have to start somewhere.
As to your questions, each barn handles falls differently. You are in NO WAY being a helicopter parent for asking to be notified when your child falls. On the contrary, it is your responsibility to keep your child safe, and a fall off of a horse is different than a fall on the playground as they usually involve speed and height. Trust your gut!
FYI, being a green rider is not a bad thing! Two lessons a month is not much time on horseback, so it’s going to take a while for her to gain the skills necessary to progress. My daughter has ridden 5 days per week for 2 years and is finally now just looking like an experienced rider!
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As a young rider I fell off in front of my mother in an amazing varied number of ways. When my 6 year old walk/ trotting daughter failed to properly steer and pointed her horse toward a 2 foot jump, her horse obligingly popped over the jump. She hung on over the jump, but failed to stick the landing. That night I called my mother and thanked her for continuing to let me ride, and told her “now I know how you felt after all those times watching me fall.” Her response: “Good.” DD still rides, and some day she will call me when her son falls off for the first time. It is tough watching your daughter fall.
When I taught beginner lessons I used to give my students flowers made from old horse show ribbons when they fell. They were not for falling off, but for the effort of getting up and getting back on the horse. Getting back on depended on the type of fall, and when in doubt they earned their flower the next time they rode. One little girl actually giggled herself off, totally surprising her saintly pony and all watching. All ponies can have a bad day, but I think that her instructor should have stepped in sooner to school the pony or modified the lesson to ensure success and safety. Once was a whoops, the second time was a red flag. I second the need for a grazing rein and vet check for the pony. It is a good idea for your daughter to understand that the pony was trying to tell humans about something; pain, sour job attitude, needs time off etc. rather then blame the pony as just a jerk.
Some kids just hop back on without a moments thought, and some of us are surprised when we are a bit worried or fearful for the first few rides. Everyone responds differently, but you can’t bully or yell that fear away. Great idea to have her go to the barn to watch team practices or help in some way. Keep an eye out, and let your daughter know that being a little apprehensive for the first ride does not mean the end of her riding and won’t stay forever, if she expresses any worries. Be pro active and talk to her instructor if any issues crop up, they should welcome the feed back. If the instructor has no strategies for dealing with fear then reconsider that one. Even though I can still hear my very British pony club instructor barking “Get UP, Get UP, have another GO!!” as I was sliding along the ground after a fall at a jump, there are many positive and effective ways to overcome nerves and fear. Learning to fall and get back on are one of the great life lessons riding and horses teach us.
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OP, I think you are asking good questions.
It is hard when you do not know what you don’t know.
Keep asking questions.
You will always get variable answers here. It is highly unlikely you will ever get just one answer so you will have to read them all and sift thru to go with those that make the most sense to you.
https://www.ponyclub.org/FindPonyClub/Map.aspx
The link should take you to a page that allows you to put your zipcode in and it will tell you if there is a club near you.
I think Pony Club is amazing, but will warn you that like all things that are lead by volunteers from club to club the experience can vary from excellent to just adequate.
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Sorry this is ridiculous. I’ve had 1 fall off a horse and I severely broke my wrist so there’s your anecdotal evidence.
The big problem with all of you saying just get back on it’s a fall no big deal- how exactly do YOU know if its a big deal? Asking a kid who’s shaken if they are okay is not proof they weren’t hurt. And unless you are a trained medical professional you have no business making that judgement call. How do you know if a bone is broken or the kid has a concussion? You might not. Kids don’t know the signs and may not realize if they are okay or not.
And this is just a freaking riding lesson- it is really worth the risk of sending a kid that hit their head back on the horse right away? we arent going to the olympics here - they are kids taking a lesson and will be perfectly okay if they dont get back on the horse but instead try again another day. There is no proof a kid getting back on immediately will make them a better rider. That is so old school- every kid has different needs and showing them respect for their judgement about their well being can go a long way in them trusting an instructor.
For those of you who say ambulance or get back on- please never teach beginners. I would never ride with some one with that attitude much less let my kid ride with them. Make sure your parents know that about you before you take their money.
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I see people recommend pony club on these boards a lot- I was told the same thing when my kid started riding but our local one only allows members that have a horse that they can bring to their events. That really limits membership.
Traumatized? Really?
Is this your only child? Have you not spent much time around children? As the old cliche goes, parenting is not for sissies. This event barely registers on the trauma meter. If you’re going to be the parent of a Horse Girl, you need to toughen up. (Said with a little bit of tongue in cheek, but the truth, nonetheless.)
OP, it’s really important, when you post here, to provide all the details because they really do matter. If you had posted the actual complete details of the incident right up front, you would likely have gotten different responses, because putting a relatively inexperienced young rider on a dirty stopper pony for a jumping lesson is vastly different from putting that same rider on a naughty pony in a flat lesson. Especially given your latest bit of added information that the first two falls were at the walk or trot.
And circling back around to the idea of being traumatized…
My younger son broke his wrist falling off roller skates when he was 9 or 10. The general attitude of all involved, including the ER docs and the orthopedic surgeon, was “no big deal, happens all the time.” No one, including me or my son, treated it like a traumatic event. It was just an example of “stuff happens.”
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Pony Club now includes what they call Centers. Basically lesson barns where the students use those lesson horses for mounted activities (lessons and rallies).
Another point is that pony club teaches far more than mounted stuff, if you have a good leader. Good horsemanship, which includes safety stuff.
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Hi, agree that Pony Club is a great option, but clubs are all run in different ways and all clubs are not always suitable for all situations. Pony Club Centers are riding academies that follow Pony Club procedures and curriculum but have their own school horses.
However, there is great info on the PonyClub.org website available for all. Under the Parents/Volunteers tab go to Safety. You can read their safety handbooks, see an incident report form and learn about signs of concussions. This all may help you to feel more educated and prepared next time.
You could also get the Pony Club series of books that explains concepts of horsemanship and safety, as well as their progression of riding instruction. (For reference your daughter sounds like a D-2 or D-3)
Although my daughter rides at a hunter/jumper barn I always recommend pony club literature to help non horse parents learn the ropes. Each barn may do things slightly differently (and that’s ok) but Pony Club will always teach with an eye towards safety and horse management.
Hony is slang for an animal of horse bloodlines (e.g. a QH) that is 14.2 or smaller. The term is used to distinguish between a true pony (one of the pony breeds) and a pony-sized animal that is a horse breed. The horse I rode through most of my teen/young adult years was an Appaloosa/QH cross that was 14.2. She was a hony.
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OP, I am from New England and I was a Pony Clubber. I highly recommend that you consider getting your daughter involved. They teach valuable lessons on safety, horse management and teamwork in addition to clinics and a wonderful summer clinic at GMHA in Woodstock, VT. It is a great organization and if you go to their website, you can find a club in your area.
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No it’s not ridiculous. Your experience makes you a outlier. The vast majority of riders, especially those that started as children and continued to ride as they grew up have had lots of falls and few serious injuries. I started riding more than 50 years ago. In those years I’ve fallen off more times than can count. I literally have absolutely no idea at this point how many times I’ve fallen off a pony, horse, or mule. In those years, I’ve gone to the ER because of a fall exactly 3 times. My experience is much more typical than yours.
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IME “hony” is most often used for a horse in the 14.2-15h range. overgrown pony or small horse that might as well be a pony. I have never heard it used for a pony that can actually measure as a pony.
And I’ve had an AQHA, APHA, and Morgan/quarter cross that were all ponies. At least for USEF purposes, height is the only definition of pony.
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2 people, 3 opinions. :lol:
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I think there are about a million school ponies that stop and drop their heads! that is why they invented “daisy reins.” It doesn’t make the pony a terrible school horse – it means the trainer should have stopped and fashioned a set of baling twice daisy reins after the first stop and fall at slow speed
As an instructor, I would not have let your child canter that pony if she wasn’t secure enough to stay on at the walk and trot . But all instructors make mistakes…I would ask not to ride that pony again because your daughter is not secure in the saddle enough to handle that particular pony trick. Definitely not without daisy reins! (Those are a string that go up from the bit to the headstall then connect to the saddle directly. Pony simply won’t be able to put its head down that low when they are correctly adjusted.). The child doesn’t have to do anything at all to make them work, just pretend they aren’t there!
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