Did you know if they were going to this particular trainer prior to their leaving? If so that may have been the time to give them the heads up. If not, I think I would have to say something to the mother/parent but the kicker is how to go about it without seeming gossipy and sour grapes. There are 2 men on the Safe Sport list, both of who were trainers in my area once upon a time a couple decades ago. One, a few of us always joked about what his attraction as a trainer was as it wasn’t his ability as a trainer, but he had a gaggle of women following him around “training with him” I have no idea what his Safe Sport situation is. While I didn’t know his entire client base, his groupies were all well over 21. The other trainer raised more than a few eyebrows and there were rumors. As with many barns you have the clique of clients - in this case young girls who pal around together and in this case were trainer groupies. My mom could smell a rat and had I been a kid riding with him, it wouldn’t be for long. Long story longer - the thing is here’s 2 examples of trainers who had a good client base, had riders that did pretty decently in the show ring and all we did we was speculate. Maybe one of us should said to a parent - how is it appropriate your 13 year old daughter is staying over at her trainers house all the time? Good luck, I hope this conversation goes well and the trainer is on the parents’ radar in more ways than horses.
I would also make sure that the parents ard familiar with SS. If they are not USEF members, they may not be aware .
Even if they don’t show etc, SS info is still good to know. The concepts cover many things in life
People who pull this type of stuff with minors don’t tend to change their stripes. Tell the parents.
the thing is most working adults have to take some form of harassment training for their jobs - which is all related to workplace issues. How many take that training and apply at least some of it to their kid’s school, sports programs, riding, and other activities? Unfortunately, most of these people don’t come off as creepy - often there’s no personal radar that gives you a red flag warning, and they don’t always pick on everyone, sometimes it’s just one person they’ll target, and it can be the girl (or boy) that’s not the prettiest, most “developed” it’s the kid they can groom the easiest. Please let us know if /when you have this conversation and how it goes. Letting a parent know not only benefits their kids but can also be another set of eyes, ears for another child.
I agree that many folks have work /job related training but the issues of young folks and sports has different nuance and rules.
Bullying in different forms ( retaliation, shunning, isolation) , one on one contact, closed doors, unsupervised training sessions. Travel .
Parents and teens need to know this stuff
