Sea Aire owner (Laura Bowery-Falco) in the news for alleged DWI

[Anne_FS]

Hamptons mom beat up nanny, then drove drunk with her toddler in the car:...

"A Hamptons mom is in hot water after she physically tossed aside her nanny who valiantly tried to stop the mother-of-two from driving drunk with her young child in her car, police say.

"Laura Bowery-Falco, 44, is banned from seeing her children after the July 11 arrest.

"Police say the Noyack mom, the owner of an equestrian stable and showgrounds, was drunk when she tried to drive off with her 14-month-old in the car, NBC New York reported.

"Appearing in Southampton Court Wednesday, Bowery-Falco now faces charges of aggravated DWI, endangering the welfare of a child and harassment. Her attorney says no one saw her actually drive the car and that he plans to “defend the case vigorously.” Bowery-Falco is a good mom, Ed Burke Jr. told NBC.

"Her website describes her as a champion equestrian who now helps train aspiring riders at her Watermill facility.

““We have an individual that’s never been before the court, is a very positive member of the community,” Burke said. “She has done a lot of good here.””

NBC news article here: http://www.nbcnewyork.com/news/local/Mom-Beats-Nanny-Drunk-Driving-Hamptons--215871811.html

[Fergs]

Classy!

[happymom]

This has no place on this board.

[Lori_B]

Unless someone on this board was considering putting her children in lessons with or horses in training with her, in which case it’s valuable information.

[skydy]

I am not sure how I feel about this thread. It does smack of gossip, which is not horse related, since the charges have nothing to do with the horses or clients of the trainer, only the horse professional herself.

Then again, the incident is public in the newspapers and online
http://www.ratemyhorsepro.com/news/hamptons-trainer-charged-with-harrassment-endangering-child.aspx

Where do we draw the line between information and gossip?

I can understand that some parents may feel that this incident would keep them from using this trainer for their children.

However there is nothing horse related here, no ripping off clients, no drugging horses and no other dubious horse related practices, only what seems like a very unfortunate incident and lack of judgment that could possibly be the worst mistake that this woman has ever made
I don’t know her, so have no way of knowing if this behavior is completely out of character, or not.

[Alagirl]

having grown up in an environment where it is expected of riders and trainers to be hard drinking and partying…

It also reeks of rather poor judgment that she thinks it’s ok to drive, much less with her children while bombed…
What does she make students do when on the sauce!
And no, I don’t think throwing the nanny around to drive drunk was a one time/isolated incident!

[onelanerode]

[QUOTE=happymom;7085384]
This has no place on this board.[/QUOTE]

I would imagine this thread would be the least of her problems at the moment. If you don’t want to get your name and picture in the paper/on TV/online for doing something incredibly stupid, then don’t do something incredibly stupid.

[danceronice]

@skydy;7086634

I am not sure how I feel about this thread. It does smack of gossip, which is not horse related, since the charges have nothing to do with the horses or clients of the trainer, only the horse professional herself.

It goes a long way to saying whether she as a horse professional is someone other horse people would like to do business with. Drunk driving is one of the things I do not forget or forgive and someone who does something that stupid without demonstrating they have SERIOUSLY changed their ways would not be someone I’d be comfortable trusting with a horse, a child, and lots of money.

[Anne_FS]

“Gossip”? Do you know what that word means? How can it “smack of gossip” when it’s a direct news item of factual charges?

If the nanny is a nasty piece of work who because of previous disagreements is trying to set up her boss, she’s going to be shown up as a liar in court, but if the allegations are true then it’s part of the decision in sending children/horses to that barn. The police elected to charge Bowery-Falco, and I’d think the alleged assault is more worrying. If she was drunk, that could explain the assault (not excuse, explain). If she wasn’t drunk and slapped her nanny around when she was stone cold sober, that’s a bigger problem.

[Lori_B]

Yeah, once she’s charged with a crime, it’s not gossip anymore. It could easily turn out to be false, for any reason, but the fact of the charges, is, well, a fact.

[skydy]

Anne FS; I mean “gossip” in the sense of talking about someone’s problems for entertainment, as in a “gossip column”. I do “know what the word means”.
Perhaps you should look up the definition before bringing out the snark…

As I said, I can understand that this incident would have some parents thinking twice before choosing this trainer for their child.

[skydy]

@Anne FS;7087168

“Gossip”? Do you know what that word means? How can it “smack of gossip” when it’s a direct news item of factual charges?

To clarify, Anne FS,
I enjoy participating here because the majority of posters are civil. There are exceptions of course…However, most people are able to post as they would speak to someone IRL.
It really takes but a moment to look at your post and decide if that would be an appropriate response IRL.
I found your comment (above) uncivil , unnecessary and wrong.

If you choose to be rude, please (at least) try to have your facts straight.

[TheJenners]

Not sure of the laws in that state, it could be the harassment charge, but why wasn’t she also charged with assault? I know in some states, they can be interchanged.

And DUI/DWI is something that is a huge no-no; even if she wasn’t “seen” driving (per what is probably a very good defense atty), the officer obviously had probable cause for an arrest. Might not fly past a jury of her peers, but there it is, nonetheless. Drinking doesn’t CAUSE or CHANGE behavior, it merely causes inhibitions that normally rein in the behavior to be less. If you are an arrogant person who thinks the rules don’t apply, but keep it under wraps…then you might behave as this person did when intoxicated. And that might be important to someone considering her for whatever it is she does in the horse world.

[Bluey]

[QUOTE=TheJenners;7087845]
Not sure of the laws in that state, it could be the harassment charge, but why wasn’t she also charged with assault? I know in some states, they can be interchanged.

And DUI/DWI is something that is a huge no-no; even if she wasn’t “seen” driving (per what is probably a very good defense atty), the officer obviously had probable cause for an arrest. Might not fly past a jury of her peers, but there it is, nonetheless. Drinking doesn’t CAUSE or CHANGE behavior, it merely causes inhibitions that normally rein in the behavior to be less. If you are an arrogant person who thinks the rules don’t apply, but keep it under wraps…then you might behave as this person did when intoxicated. And that might be important to someone considering her for whatever it is she does in the horse world.[/QUOTE]

Drinking doesn’t quite work like that.

Yes, alcohol disinhibits people and some may act up, but you would be surprised, as some are, by what they then may say and do, because there is not a straight reasoned line to who someone is and how they may appear at any one time their brain is altered by any drug, including alcohol.

Some mean people may become more mean when drinking, others may mellow and yet others may be inconsistent in how they act when drunk.
One example, I have never cussed, don’t even know cusswords, don’t understand when others cuss what they are saying.
If I was to become drunk, I may cuss like a sailor with words I don’t even know I know, but are stored somewhere from hearing them, that I normally just don’t have access to or would dream of using if I did.

That is why it is hard at times to convict someone that did something illegal, that acted clearly “under the influence”.
The responsibility they are convicted on is because they choose to drink, but not really of what they do when drunk in itself.

All of us are open to many possibilities and we are who we are because of our rational side to our thoughts puts all that together and ends up being what it is, who we are.

Alter that in any way and whatever may come out of it is anyone’s guess.

Why anyone chooses to drink, knowing it is a poison and will alter your brain, that is the real puzzle.

The trainer in this story may or not be a “nice” person, but if she drinks, as the story went, definitely has shown bad judgment, that she should be hung for.

I know people with more or less of a drinking problem and that knowing they have one don’t provide for it.
That I don’t know what we can do about, until they break existing laws because of it, as some sooner or later will do.:no:

[Chall]

Bluey, that was an interesting post. However
"The responsibility they are convicted on is because they choose to drink, but not really of what they do when drunk in itself."
Are you sure?

[Bluey]

[QUOTE=Chall;7087969]
Bluey, that was an interesting post. However
"The responsibility they are convicted on is because they choose to drink, but not really of what they do when drunk in itself."
Are you sure?[/QUOTE]

No, as we all well know, what comes out of a case depends on so much else than what brought it to court, as we see daily in the news.

On principle, it is up to the attorneys to explain that if it favors their side, or for the other side to dismiss that away to the jury.
No telling what will weight most in any one case.

[Equibrit]

@skydy;7086634

Where do we draw the line between information and gossip?

When there’s a conviction ?

[danceronice]

[QUOTE=Equibrit;7088032]
When there’s a conviction ?[/QUOTE]

I’d say being charged (which is a formal filing in the public record) is not gossip.

Speculating about why she drinks, the relationship with the nanny, etc. is more in the vein of gossip, but that she’s charged with a crime is fact and a matter of public record, most likely forever as most records for adults aren’t expunged without really really REALLY good reason.

[Anne_FS]

[QUOTE=skydy;7087761]
I found your comment (above) uncivil , unnecessary and wrong.

If you choose to be rude, please (at least) try to have your facts straight. ;)[/QUOTE]

My facts are straight. The woman is facing charges. That’s not being rude, and it’s not posted for “entertainment” purposes.

If we were speaking IRL and you said to me that stating facts is the same as gossip, I would’ve said to you IRL that gossip means idle talk or rumor, not police blotter facts, and I was telling you the latter.

[Anne_FS]

[QUOTE=TheJenners;7087845]
Not sure of the laws in that state, it could be the harassment charge, but why wasn’t she also charged with assault? [/QUOTE]

I wondered about that as well. Perhaps the nanny declined to press charges about the assault; that’s the most likely scenario. She was slapped around and knocked down but not seriously hurt; she may just have shaken the dust off her feet and said she wouldn’t press charges. The police obviously thought the woman was intoxicated & charged her, so it was handled. Her lawyer is just doing his job and saying it can’t be proved that she was driving because the police didn’t get there until she was already at her mother’s house so nobody (but the nanny) saw her.

After that terrifying accident in NY state where the woman who had been drinking crashed and killed all those children I can understand people being on high alert about drunk driving where little ones are involved.