Thought you guys might find this interesting. (Personally, I am not a fan of most horse decor, so I am sympathetic to the husband.)
A little sympathetic, because Iām not all that fond of horse decor either, but my initial reaction to that is āAwwwwwwwwā¦you thought she was gonna grow out of it, didnāt you? Hahahahahahaha!ā
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I also find the vast majority of equestrian themed decor rather tacky. And in any case, Iām sided with the husband here - he should be able to have an input in the decorations in his own home.
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In ranch country, every oneās houses are decorated with horses.
Horses are everyoneās lifestyle, decorating with them is the norm, not the exception.
Now, living in the city and where horse life is scant, it would seem curious to have a whole house as a horse mausoleum.
As the husband in that situation, maybe ask for a room of your own and if he doesnāt care, donāt decorate it at all, use it to rest from the horse decorations?
Or get therapy for DW? 
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The members of the hunt whose homes I have visited, to the last, are decorated with hunting and horse pictures and stuff. My DH is completely uncaring about how/what is in our house (and barn) as long as it is comfortable and tidy. I decorate with my paintings --rotating them now and then --but almost all my paintings are hunting, horses, our kids, and dogs. When people come, I explain that our house is known to the family as āThe Museum of Me.ā When I ran out of wall space in the house, I started hanging my oil paintings in the barn --each horse has a painting of himself on the wall.
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I am reminded of the rhetorical question my spouse and I heard often during marriage counseling: āDid you know that about him/her before you got married?ā
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Thatās really cute
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He needs to cut a deal. Iāll buy you a horse if you remove the chintzy horse stuff.
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@Foxglove 
āMuseum of Meā
Reading the article, I agree with the husband.
Wife is grieving her loss by creating a Pity Museum of their entire house.
Operative term: their.
If she is unwilling to cut down on the memorabilia everywhere, they have bigger problems than decor.
Let her have a single room to overdecorate to her heartās content & winnow down the rest of the house to a few pieces here & there*.
*says the woman, looking around to see only the bathrooms lack any horse decor 
But, I live alone & some of the horsy decor memorializes DH
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Reminded again how great single life is
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I moved in with my boyfriend this year and was quite disappointed to find that he is one of the like, 5 men I know who actually have opinions on decorating. He refuses to consider āclassical horse head portraitsā and prefers that we not have horse decor in every room of the house. But he has accepted some level of horse themed stuff (ahem, Thelwell prints), and it helps that I agreed to literally mounting an old bike on the wallā¦
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Iāve never loved horse decor. There are some photos on the mantle, and a portrait of my young rider horse in the hall. Everything else is confined to my supplemental tack room in the basement.
When I read this this morning, I interpreted āhorse decorā as the womanās collection of prizes, trophies, and photos. Not oil portraits of hunt scenes and so on.
In our house, the agreement is as follows: in common spaces, neither of us has more sports memorabilia on display than the other. So, I only get as many ribbon jars in the living room as I want to see framed baseball jerseys. This means I have no ribbon jars in the living room. My ribbon jars are in my office, and the shrine to Ovechkin is in my husbandās office.
Like many things in life, this seems solvable with a discussion.
But maybe not the part where he thought sheād āgrow out of it.ā Grow out of your uninformed expectations, buster.
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Iām curious, whatās a ribbon jar? If the husband would bring something to the table as far as suggestions on what kind of decor he would like, then Iād be more on his side. So far, all heās done is complain about it and not offer any alternatives. Itās like the argument:
HIm āwhere do you want to go for dinner?ā
Her āHow about (random restaurant)ā
Him āNo, I donāt want to go thereā
Her āThen where do you want to go?ā
Him āI donāt knowā
Bring a suggestion or accept what it is.
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Yeah, I have to sympathize with the husband, too.
My house (such as it is) is about ME, not my horses. So antique and vintage etchings, framed photos of mine, etc. All horse stuff is pretty much put away at this point, except a few photos I have of me and my old horses. Those are suitably framed and displayed. But I do know the kind of house he means - my ex riding instructorās house was like that. Hunting prints, photos of horses, ribbons and trophies everywhere, tack in the living room . . . I get wanting to remember the good old days, but dedicate ONE room to that!
But he does need to have some suggestions. He needs to figure out what HE likes in interior decor - is it midcentury mod? Clean lines? White and more white? Once he can figure that out, he can have a conversation about it. Until then, I think heās going to be stuck.
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I initially thought this was going to be about the ādirty paddock boots by the front door & kitchen table used for tack cleaningā school of decorating, of which I am an aficionado. (That low humming you hear is Sister Parish spinning in her grave.)
But this sounds more like the house is overrun by too many tchotchkes, all of which have been deemed Very Special Repositories of Girlhood Memories and cannot be removed or trashed. The husband deserves a horcrux-free house, even if he will never get rid of the snaffle-print wallpaper in the powder room.
ā Signed, House with the dueling Don Mattingly and 1980s WIHS posters
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Just what it sounds like 
As a broke college kid trying to add some visual interest to my room and later apartment I bought some old glass hurricanes off of Craigslist and filled them up with ribbons in colors that matched our decor. And I havenāt taken them out of the jars since!
I do think thereās a difference between horse tea towels and ribbons and trophies- thereās decor and then there are mementoes. One is likely to have more emotional weight behind it. But that doesnāt make any difference if one family member is pro-having them on display and the other is not. There was an episode of the Dear Prudence podcast a few weeks ago about a woman who decorated with a ton of her motherās hand made quilts, much to the frustration of her partner, and itās not different. Have a conversation.
Hahaha I can relate to this. DH is a huge Dodger fan, and has the memorabilia and tchotchkes to prove it. Since our current space is really small, neither of us have room to display the ephemera of our passions. BUT, when the Dodgers went on their playoff run to the WS this year, we declared it a special occasion and busted out all the Dodger gear - for him, the Dodgers making it to the WS was a holiday, so it made sense to decorate for it.
When we had more space, I took over the neglected den and added some horsie touches - chalkboard painted breyers, a few choice ribbons, a art decoequse german horse poster, and hurricane lamps with leather and snaffle bit touches. I ran most of these my the DH just to give him the chance to veto anything (he actually has a pretty good eye). DH took over the garage and had his altar of āDodgertown Northā with all of this gear - so we each had our space.
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Hmmm Yeah. Itās like a preteen Breyer collection on the FP mantel āandā the flanking floor to ceiling shelves. Iāve seen that adult house 
Thereās a difference between tasty and tacky. I have a collection of antique cast iron horse drawn toys and some very nice equine art pieces, and a few old trophies on a limited amt of shelves. It blends right in with my other decor - books and family photos.
The art of negotiation is to start out with a room of her own. She might get the message when she tires of that concentrated overdone look.
I just want to thank the two people who spelled tchotchkes correctly. You made my day! It drives me nuts when people use words in Yiddish, or any other language other than English, and then donāt spell them correctly. You two warmed my heart and let me know there are people who do it right.
Rebecca
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