Spin-off of being “that boarder” … How much of a community are your boarding barns?

[FjordBCRF]

Both boarding barns I’ve been at as an adult have had very solid communities. A good handful of boarders are always willing to step up/pitch in/go above and beyond their board costs for their horses; IE paying to have additional pasture fencing installed with BOs approval, rodent control, paying for arena footing as a few bigger examples. On their time and dime with no guarantee they will reap the benefits for any length of time. Many also are happy to help I’d you need an extra check on your horse, turnout/bring in if weather is iffy, take a cooler off after someone leaves etc.

I’m in a LCOL, but pretty horse saturated area. Both barns I have experience at I would say are average as far as horse care and barn/property maintenance go, no BNT, generally boarders have horses as a serious hobby with some lessening and light showing among a few. Both barns I have been at nearly every day and see more than someone who goes a couple times a week.

While they are both decent barns, I notice holes and would have a higher standard of care myself (and which I take on myself for my horse). I would hope at a more expensive barn standards would match the price but maybe not? I am always happy to help out where I can and have been very thankful for the community, but have started to wonder without it, what things would look like? It seems pretty normal from my recent experiences but it does nag at me that I may be very lucky so far with the folks I board with and BO/BMs!

[rcy]

I would expect cost of board to cover improvements to property? I guess depending on your boarding scenario, it may be expected to pay extra or collaborate with other boarders to cover things such as meds administration… but not for something over and above for the barn owner.

[FjordBCRF]

@rcy

but not for something over and above for the barn owner.

This was my thought too. The fence example was a boarder wanting a specific scenario for their horse and wasn’t truly needed. Boarders horses didn’t spend much time there before horses had to be shifted around.

[fivestrideline]

Honestly with boarding? More money does NOT mean better care. Even in the same area. Some of the most expensive places may have lower quality care (like minimal hay/turnout, poor feed, policies that prevent owner using a different vet or farrier if the barn one isn’t working, rough handling, etc) because they have ‘pretty’ facilities or a BNT or something else that keeps clients who may not know better.

That being said, I know many places are undercharging and thus you end up with corners cut or boarders being forced to chip in for property improvements (??? heck no??? Just raise board).

[lenapesadie]

I’ve always been lucky with good barn mates.

Most certainly, moving from a mid range barn to higher end I noticed a definite uptick in quality of care. The facilities were wildly better too. The location was really good as well, super close to the beach community I lived in. All things considered, it was a steal.

There was no such thing as being “that boarder” (unless you were just a butthead) at the higher end barn. You (g) just paid extra for whatever extras you felt Dobbin needed.

They did ask for some grace re blanket changes. Like if you wanted a 200 gram on if it was below 40. Don’t freak out if it got to 39 for one hour at dawn and horsey wore his 100 gram.

[RedHorses]

I’ve been very fortunate with BOs willing to do something a little different for my horses. Most obviously putting a net (provided by me) on their round bale, and feeding the grain I provide.

I do ask lots of questions when looking for a new barn so I’m not springing anything on them after moving in. My older horse has several health issues that require specific management to keep them under control which makes me extra careful about where I board. I need to be confident that medication is given, feed is correct, etc. I do go out almost every day and I do verify what’s happening - checking feed, pill supply, etc.

I think the communities have largely been of the sort that if people see something wrong with someone else’s horse they’ll let the BO know, and the owner in some cases. I haven’t boarded anywhere there’s an employee working in/around the barn all day so the extra eyes are great to catch anything amiss. Not everyone does this naturally - I remember one boarder’s horse was loose one morning when the staff arrived. Upon being told of the incident the owner mentioned having seen the horse halfway through the electric fence a couple of days previous. No, they hadn’t bothered to tell anyone so the fence could be checked/turned on.

[Sybrin]

Our barn is very small scale so we are definitely a strong community. There is only a couple of boarders who kind of fall out of the boat. One of them never shows up, the other is rude and kind of made it that way, but still we always involve everyone when it comes to plans, news, injuries etc.

When we find a horse has worms or anything else, we also notify everyone and everyone pitches in to deworm the whole stable all at once. We keep each other updated when there’s anything to keep in mind (like hey, my instructor is coming on Wednesday so from 10-11 the arena is taken), and there’s often pairs making plans to go on trail rides or go to an event together.

Barn culture in the Netherlands is a bit different. The majority of barns are DIY or part DIY. We also don’t have trainers that come with the barn, we all hire our “own” trainer and the trainer then comes on location once a week, once every two weeks etc. Therefore most of us just do our own thing, but we still like to chat, hang out and make plans.

[joiedevie99]

My riding horses live at my trainers, which is a full training only sort of place in a high HCOL area. It’s wonderful, and the small group of adult students is the absolute best group of people. We can talk for hours at shows, or on hacks. It’s very much a community - but our cooperation is more about sharing tack stalls, golf carts, and food/wine purchasing responsibilities for shows than horse care. Feed, footing, fencing, meds, etc. are all covered between the grooms and trainers (all but one of whom live on the property), and I can’t imagine them asking anyone to foot the bill for facility improvements. There are some things, like PEMF and treadmill time, that cost extra on top of board - which goes towards covering the purchase cost of the equipment, but that’s it.

I’ve boarded across the whole spectrum from very cheap diy to high end. I’ve found some amazing care at some lower-middle cost places - including where my retired horses live. They are super well cared for relative to what is needed in their lives - since they don’t work - the farrier being a week late isn’t a big deal, and the lack of facilities doesn’t matter. The stuff that is important for them - feed, turnout, careful monitoring for injuries, monitoring weight for feed adjustments/founder risk, etc. is spot on. But my working horses have a different set of needs that wouldn’t really work there.

[beowulf]

How much of a community depends on the barn type and frankly the personality of the person that runs it. No bullshit Barn Owner? You’ll probably find like-minded boarders, with the bad eggs weeded out quickly. A BO or trainer that thrives on petty drama? You’ll see it reflected in the people they choose to draw into their circle, and you’ll see it too in the ever-revolving exodus of friendly faces replaced by new every few years or so.

As a BM I had very specific questions to ask prospective boarders. Most of them could be answered in the first interview - what is your horse’s current care like, why are you leaving (sometimes answered by the former question), how would you care for this horse at home, and what would you change about your current place? One thing became abundantly obvious to me the more people we vetted: there are lots of crazy, unrealistic boarders out there.

I was fortunate in one barn takeover that most of the people we inherited were good boarders. They paid on time, they knew we were charging less than market rate, and they were happy to be there. I learned the hard way that when you entertain one reasonable ask, it quickly snowballs. That barn was a life lesson to me that in big boarding operations you stick with the boarding protocol unless there is a medical or vet-suggested reason to change protocol – and you need to remove “that” boarder ASAP because it quickly pollutes the barn culture, contributes to barn worker burnout, and complicates everything.

It’s the small innocuous asks that creep up on you. Of course you want to make your boarders happy. You’re not just taking their boarding checks, you’re providing a service to them and their horse. You want to provide a good community and you want them to be happy.

First they ask for a haynet in the stall. That’s a reasonable ask and covered in the boarding contract. Now, they want two haynets at all time and they both need to be 4 flakes each. You’re not doing 8 flakes, Dobbin already gets plenty of hay at turn in - but you’ll do 2 flakes in each. Dobbin’s starts wasting all this hay, the workers complain. Then it’s an extra water bucket despite the horse only drinking half of the first; less reasonable but water’s important so we’ll do it. Then it’s extra bedding - okay, cutting into costs here but the workers love Dobbin so we’ll do it. Then it’s putting a hay net while Dobbin is outside - less reasonable but we can try. Then it’s they want to change their stall because Dobbin doesn’t get along with his neighbor. Then they want to change the pasture because they think Dobbin doesn’t like it. Dobbin’s in his new pasture when they say he’s too close to the road. Then they want night turnout because Dobbin gets bothered by the flies; we can’t reasonably accommodate this request because no one is here after hours. They think Dobbin is skinny while he’s a BSC of 7 and want you to feed a special feed that you don’t provide. They’e caught sneaking Dobbin more hay. Dobbin’s getting fat. Vet says Dobbin needs to be fed less. We cut back his food and he’s still gaining weight. You find out they are feeding Dobbin a full 5 qt bucket of grain each time they come, in addition to the handful of vet-mandated grain he already gets split AM/PM. Dobbin founders. Now they need a whole new host of accommodations: soaked hay, no grain, round the clock icing and care, DEEP bedding, daily wrapping of all four hooves. You do it because it’s your responsibility to care for Dobbin. Dobbin gets better and now the list of special accommodations resumes: Dobbin wants the end stall, Dobbin needs solo turnout, Dobbin needs his blanket changed 2-3x a day depending on 2 degree fluctuations. Then they get mad that all of these asks are outside of the boarding contract that they signed and blast you on social media after they leave in a huff and take half of your worker’s tools (pitchforks, skip buckets, the ‘good’ wheelbarrow, and water buckets)… True story and that was not even my craziest boarder, just most memorable because we open up the barn in the AM and find Dobbin and our tools gone. BTW, “Dobbin” was a 14h pony which makes the whole thing crazier.

That other thread is a pretty good study in how one ask becomes two, then three, then six and so on. Before you know it, you have “that” boarder and the community of the barn is directly affected by these personalities. I didn’t touch much about the community while “that” boarder was there, but that boarder exhausted all of the goodwill in the barn and it surprised me how many of the boarders commented they were relieved that person was gone.

[Obsidian_Fire]

My last boarding barn was a wonderful community (had to move because the owners sold). Adult ladies, one older gentleman. I’m still in touch (as in, have breakfast with every couple weeks/month) with another boarder and the (former) BO. Wonderful wonderful people. Was the care what it should be? Mostly. I was self care, so as long as things were in good repair I was fine. Lots of “little asks” accommodated. Sometimes to the point of “are you kidding me?” with very raised eyebrows (on my part). Thankfully with a small barn and an exceptionally experienced older boarder, things like that…
We had one gal move in who… let’s just say she burned her bridges and left. We helped her. LOL.
So yes, barns can be a community. They can be a family.
My current barn, is just a friend of mine and her hubby. It’s their personal barn, they have one other gal boarding with them. There is a trainer and one or 2 of her horses but otherwise that’s it. I enjoy my friends company, so in that regard it’s a win. Sometimes I wish there were more people around, I’m used to more, but mostly it’s fine.
I’ve always been the boarder who would help out and do things on my own dime. But, I’ve gotten burned a couple times, very badly, so now I mostly stay out of such things.

[Lunabear1988]

I board at a large barn. Extras are really not possible with how they have set up the care. If your horse needs something special (like hay soaked) then you need to set it up yourself or move barns.

Luckily, the barn community is awesome. Most people there are so supportive and everybody’s willing to step up to help when needed.

There are things I love about the place which mostly include the people, trainers and quality of hay. There definitely things that I wish could improve but sometimes it is what it is. It’s a barn where it’s best to be a pretty involved owner. I’m that way naturally so it’s okay.

[2DogsFarm]

My personal experience is Historical, as I’ve had my horses at home for 18yrs.

Apologies, this is a Book

1st barn I boarded was leased by my trainer at that time (who I bought my Hunter from). She made improvements to what had been an abandoned property & it was a workmanlike, not luxurious barn.
But her focus was getting known as a local BNT so Show Barn became her primary aim for boarders.
When my horse & I didn’t drink the Koolaid & show every weekend, we were exiled from the “elite” 12-stall barn to the larger general population. Fine with me, care was the same, same access to lessons when I wanted, trails off property & DH shareboarded a QH belonging to a non-showing boarder. We did attend some local shows - Regional & B - with pretty good results for my horse: Regional Reserve AA his 2nd year showing. We became friendly with some boarders, attended Barn parties hosted by trainer, socially active barn.
We lasted there 3yrs.
During which time trainer took to drink & coke in her climb to what she perceived as The Top.
Final straw was when - in return for work DH did for her including a phone system, PA system, locks & security system (all provided by his self-owned business) she promised to pay for the work by covering his fees at a show.
Then reneged at the show.
Causing us to move to Barn 2

#2 was a low-key boarding barn. Mixed group of WP, trailriders & a few like us: English riders, who did occasional shows & trails.
We grew very close to several boarders - some had also decamped from Barn #1.
DH shared board on another horse for a couple years, then we bought his horse.
We reconnected with a Dressage-focused trainer/friend who came monthly to give lessons to 3 or 4 of us. For these occasions we had potluck after lessons.
When he relocated to a nearby state, another trainer - used by a friend of one of our boarder friends, also Dressage - took over the monthly group.
But BM was a know-it-all 20-something. He was mentored by absentee BO who showed Cutting horses (arena had a mechanical calf) & care suffered. Poor quality feed, no water in (8h) turnout, clueless barn workers (one was feeding grain, ignored a horse lying down who did not get up for the grain… Yup, colic). These & other irritants had us follow Dressage guy to the nearby state & Barn #3

#3 was a brand new State of the Art facility. Built for the trainer by a client with more $$ than horse sense.
But he let trainer have a say in outfitting the barn. So we had a flyspray system, monitor for water consumed in each stall, lovely, roomy stalls w/auto-waterers, stalls picked several times a day, 20ac of trails right on property, a Cross Country course with obstacles from BN through Training, including a creek crossing. Olympic sized outdoor & indoor arenas with perfect footing. Upstairs viewing room with panoramic glass window to the indoor below was a guest suite with a complete kitchen, bedroom & bathroom with shower. Tackroom had laundry (done by staff) & a lovely bathroom on the ground floor.
But…
Insufficient turnout for the 16 horses meant 4h daily per horse.
Social life dictated by the BO, though we did have dinner off-site with trainer at least once a week.
Next But: board increased annually & included a weekly lesson (which neither I or DH wanted, we were fine with bi-weekly) until nearly my entire paycheck went to board. I was earning $40K at the time (late 90s).
So in Year 4 we moved to Barn #4

#4 was family-owned, mainly 4H (grandparents financed for grandkids). But as the English Outliers, DH & I were welcomed, made to feel like family. We even did some casual For Fun lessons O/F (DH built PVC standards, Dad BO helped) for some kids who were interested. And trails were a short ride down the road & through a neighbor’s field with permission. We even took some 4H kids who’d never been outside an arena on a trailride. Add 2 young gals who shareboarded our horses - one had shown Hunters as a Jr with me at Barn #1.
This lasted 2yrs, until a chunk of trails was bought by a Hunter who didn’t want us “scaring his deer” with our daylight rides.
And, I bought a 3yo OTTB in partnership with the gal I’d shown with.
As we planned to flip him, we began looking into a nearby place with a H/J trainer.
Moved to Barn #5.
I still see the daughter of #4 at Fair every year & we are friendly.

Barn #5 was not that social for us. BOs were a couple - she was sweet, he was an Asshat.
They had a RID stallion & 4 RID & Irish TB youngsters for sale. Neither one could handle the stud & nobody did anything with the sale horses.
And trainer had decamped before we moved.
My OTTB partner decided she wanted the horse & bought me out, moved him to a show barn.
Care was good & they had a small BN Xcountry course in a back field. Trails were a longish ride or a short haul to a state park.
Trainer from #2 came for monthly or so lessons for a while, then I connected with my current Dressage trainer (friend of BOs).
We were there 2yrs. Then I lost DH
A gal I worked with (who had shown H/J in her native Turkey) started coming with me to ride.
She also rode one of the “sale” horses.
Bought my farmette & moved my TB & a new one home a year later.

[Scribbler]

I have been in self board barns most of my horse life. As a teen, in a 5 horse barn in a suburban backyard close to trails. Property owners were hands-off and us 15 year old girls organized hay, feed, bedding, farrier, vet. No repairs or upgrades ever done beyond a 15 year old hammering in a nail. Community was very middle school both good and bad

As an adult I’ve mostly been in a big self board nonprofit club with 3 barns, total 60 stalls. People find their friend groups within the barns based on discipline and personality. In the past there have been years of straight out psychotic interpersonal conflict but for the past decade it’s been much more low key. The place is run by a board of directors elected by and from the membership, no employees at all. Plus barn committees in each barn. We have enough revenue to do decent maintenance. I’ve been on the board now for years so I have a view of the whole operation.

So there’s clearly an overall sense of community and responsibility that kicks in for big emergencies or public events. But within the larger organization people have close friend groups that they rely on, and then general friendliness to others (with some outlier situations). There is no authority figure, no BO or BM or trainer in charge, and it’s pretty much impossible to evict anyone that pays their rent and fees on time because of the rules on nonprofit organizations.

[chestnutmarebeware]

I’ve never had issues with fellow boarders helping with night checks, etc. but I’m not paying money to the BO beyond my board for improvements. If I’m not ok with the facilities, I don’t move in in the first place. And damage that needs to be fixed is part of doing business.

Edit because I’m not sure how a random section of @beowulf ‘s post showed up as a quote.???

[Bebe_Falcon1]

Oh, interesting thread. This is the first barn I feel like I know the BO well enough to have conversations about ideas I have (to help with the workload) or offer assistance for those bigger chores like a spring clean-up etc. I’ve been at barns, most memorably a co-op barn a number of years ago, where the most established boarder would shout at you if you brought forward any ideas or suggestions that she didn’t like (it was completely unexpected and out of the blue, I do wish now that I’d spun around and screamed right back at her).

Currently, there are boarders (fellow mini/pony owners) where I’m at now that bring out things for use by the rest of the barn. One of those poop scooper bucket things, extra crossties (which I purchased rings for so they could be installed at more appropriate small pony height), obstacles like wooden bridges and brick walls, etc. I’ve purchased and supplied mud grids for the paddock my mare is in, and a haynet that I fill in the winter and hang on the opposite side of the field from the round bale feeder to encourage everyone to move around more in the colder weather. Stuff that I’ve not done before and I’ve not seen other boarders do elsewhere, either. So that’s improved the barn atmosphere for sure. (And all things are run by the BO first, of course).

@Sybrin

One of them never shows up, the other is rude and kind of made it that way, but still we always involve everyone when it comes to plans, news, injuries etc.

I think this is so important, and bless you all for being inclusive. There’s nothing worse than being somewhere - barns included - where there are cliques and people feeling unwelcome or left out.

I’m a typical introvert, but will always make an effort to acknowledge other boarders or include someone in a conversation if they’re in the barn aisle. Just an offhand comment, a question, whatever. Something, anything to contribute to a positive, supportive atmosphere.

[candyappy]

It has been a long time but we did have a real “community” of sorts between different groups of boarders.

Usually those who rode the same disciplines were closer to one another but we had a lot of boarders who went out of their way to help others who might be in need of assistance.

Some of my closest barn friends varied widely in different age categories but we had great times together and most of that was after people had worked their horses and we just socialized afterwards.

We also had a small core of people who would pitch in with stalls and feeding if the barn workers went AWOL.

BO maintained the footing and fences in paddocks and facilities with no help from us.

[hillary_again]

I took care of my horse myself in a neighbor’s backyard as a teenager. As an adult, I am on my fourth boarding barn.

The current one is big - 100+ horses. It’s a different setup, without much of a manager. We have our phone # on our stalls, and we are pretty much it for keeping an eye on the horses. The workforce feeds and cleans. There are multiple barns on the 40 acre+ property. Each has it’s own personality.

In “mine”, we have a close group of about 15 owners, some with >1 horse. We look after each other’s horses and watch out for issues that need maintenance. The other owners aren’t as connected - they are more casual riders, or come at odd times, or __ - just don’t cross paths. We are a committed community, but do our own thing - different disciplines, levels of competing, ages, etc. It’s a lot different than having a hands on owner or barn manager, but at this point, after a few years, I would find it to be a real adjustment to being in a more typical setup - really gotten used to this! What makes this work: several boarders who have part time jobs or don’t work at all, and are at the barn a lot.

[FjordBCRF]

It’s been interesting reflecting since I got my gelding. When I was growing up, nearly all my best friends through grade school were horse friends from the barn. We did 4H, showed, mucked stalls and lived for all of it. In college, most of my friends were horse people being that I went to a school with an equestrian program. I wasn’t AS close with a lot of them as I only took lessons and wasn’t in all the same classes, but same story.

I got connected through college with a local horsewoman who I helped exercise her horses for 16 years before I got mine. Having that small foot in kept me from never feeling like I wasn’t in the horse world to some degree, but it lessened over time.

It wasn’t until I got my gelding that I realized how little I had in common and struggled to connect with co-workers and mainly friends of or by-proxy of my ex husband (he was obnoxiously social). My long term non horsey friends are mostly long distance. I realize now that I spent the better part of a decade really feeling disconnected socially without people who really got me that I could relate to.

As much as I wish I could run my own facility the way I’d want to, I really do appreciate the community aspect of the boarding barns I’ve been at, and that other people have similar experiences. Every barn seems to have trade offs to consider, but it seems like when you find a good community, that helps in major ways. Being a bit of a natural loner and someone who has never fit into any other type of community, I really do feel a sense of belonging which is nice!

[AW]

This is the best explanation of how it goes south that I’ve ever read! I have a small enough barn that I can do pretty personalized care for the special needs/ancient horses, but I also have an AMAZING group of boarders who understand that if I don’t keep a hard line on the rules, boarder X will be storing her childrens’ off-season clothing in my barn!

[lenapesadie]

One barn I boarded at, the barn friendships were deep. While I enjoyed the relationships immensely, I have a relatively full social calendar outside of horses and work. It got to a point where those barn friendships were taking too much time. I ended up preferring the lighter relationship crowd at a different barn. I could go to barn, do horse stuff and leave.