It reads like, whatever the problem with this horse was is a reportable disease and is something that the state vet is now involved in, so though I agree that I have never shared by vet records with my barn owner, that might be why in this case they were shared.
It sounds like the OP is a very responsible horse owner and is trying to do what is best for not only their horse but all the horses in the facility.
For all the barns I’ve worked at the only thing I have ever had to request of an owner is to let us know when the euth was going to take place. That allowed us to clear everyone else away so the owner could have privacy, be present to support the owner, and ensure that we could gently guide the euth to occur in a spot that was easy to remove the remains from. I’ve had to dismantle stalls before and it isn’t fun plus it then serves as a reminder of what happened.
Like others have said, I have gently yet firmly pushed owners to not witness the removal or burial of remains. For both those circumstances I have ensured that the remains have someone respected with them at all times so they’re not “alone”.
I would never imagine getting upset with a boarder or a vet for euthanizing their own horse on my property. You handle any logistics, support your boarder, and go about the business.
AH, missed that about a reportable disease. Makes more sense, thanks.
Yes to all the above. The BO is acting cray cray and definitely in the wrong.
However HO will only compound the tension grief and drama by confronting the BO about what they said to a third party. If they are craycray enough they will deny they said it or go scream at the vet again.
As you are already on the way out just continue that route.
In my opinion it was never her business and any information or decision you make is for you alone.
Keeping her in the loop is a courtesy not a right.
I am so sorry for the loss of your horse.
Owner is presently residing about 850 miles away. Horse was totally unable to walk. Had to be nerve blocked in order to remove from stall to euthanize.
Oh that’s awful! I’m so sorry
Just for clarification, I have a long, long history with my vet. My vet is totally candid with me, truthful at all times and always puts the animal’s welfare first. This “conversation” absolutely happened. After the fact, I heard this is not the first time this situation has arise. I’m not sure of the accuracy of any previous incident, only this one.
OK, that’s good clarification.
I still wouldn’t bring it up with BO. I’d just continue on my own way and cut all professional ties.
I’m so sorry for your loss, OP.
I’d tell the SO to kick rocks but really, it isn’t worth your time and hassle. Just get out of the barn and don’t look back. Like @endlessclimb mentioned, if anyone asked your opinion on the barn and how it’s managed, you can share your experience. That in itself goes pretty far.
Unless the SO had any sort of ownership in the horse, they have no legal right to decisions regarding euthanasia outside of disposal of the body IF you planned on burying the horse on their property. If you planned to have the horse professionally removed, then they could have some say in when people entered the property to remove the horse. However, they have no legal right to your horse’s medical records and no legal right to make any sort of decision in treatment for your horse. They are overstepping their boundaries if that is what they are asserting.
Again, I’m very sorry for your loss and you should not be concerned about a shitty SO who is 850 miles away and making the situation worse for you. So unnecessary but the best thing to do is to cherish the good memories with your horse, find healing and move on to brighter horizons. Hugs.
BO only needs to know when a truck will show to remove body & notified of one less stall you’d be paying for in the future. Anything else is unnecessary.
I’m very sorry for the loss of your mare.
You didn’t do anything wrong. I have no idea what’s up with the SO and I’m sorry she’s behaving this way while you’re going through this, but her issues are not your problem. I’m sure your vet is capable of responding however they feel is appropriate and since the SO isn’t even talking to you, you don’t have to waste a moment’s thought on her. It’s a shame when someone turns out to be something other than what you thought you knew but you have enough on your plate to deal with. Give yourself some time to grieve and let the petty stuff go. Big hugs!
Yeah, then that makes no sense for them to have any say at all.
I’m so sorry for your loss - not an easy thing at all.
Thank you everyone. You’re right. People ultimately show their true colors. I’m a huge believer in karma. I’m packing up my stuff this weekend and will never be back. This is a very large boarding facility with a number of lovely boarders. Unfortunately, I will probably lose them as friends. There is a lot of tension between the stable owner and my trainer ,who has now purchases her own facility. That’s a novel for another day. Current stable owner has in the past threatened to evict anyone who she perceives as a “problem”. I can’t put them in that situation.
I’m still so upset over this sudden loss. Life throws you curveballs. I’m 73 and she was 17. Rock solid under saddle, enough personality for 3 horses. Never lame. She was my last. I always thought we’d “ride off into the sunset together”. I could have handled retiring her, but not this.
Warmblood1, thank you. I’m getting there very slowly. And the horse was removed from the property by people who treated her remains with kindness and dignity.
I’m so sorry for your loss. You have ever right to feel the way you do. I’d want to take a strip off the SO too, but it’s better to walk away. If ever asked about the stable, I’d be very candid about my experience.
@Wantanother so sorry you have had to deal with an non-sympathetic BO during such a hard time. I am curious why your State Vet is involved. That may be the key to why you BO was/is difficult.
ETA - are you the horse owner or is that a different person? What is your relationship to the horse?
OP I am so sorry for your loss and you absolutely did right by your horse
That BO and I would be having some kind of words for sure and they’d be about understanding how the BO could want in one hand and sh!t in the other. I hope the vet schooled the BO too
Very weird. I too wonder if it is because of the reportable disease. As a BO, I would be very concerned about having one of those on property.
It would be weird not to involve the on-site BM in logistics…I usually make all the arrangements post-euthanasia so I would need to be involved. We tend to bury horses here, and I need to approve the location and get my excavator guy out.
But the euthanasia decision is not mine to make. I am sorry the BO put you through this, OP, and sorry for your loss.
I am the owner and SO was given full access to all info. I don’t want to go into why the Satae Vet is involved, but it actually was not related to the necessity for euthanasia
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