OP, You will like this:
[QUOTE=prairiewind2;7764531]
Yes, I think it starts with them choosing you. Certainly did for me anyway. :)[/QUOTE]
My dog (who I had to pts recently, which was very tough) and the one and only cat my family had were both like that. As was one previous family dog. Never had a horse. 
but yeah - they just give you this look like “okay, you are my person, make it happen.”
Is there for sure just one? No. I really hope I get to have a similar relationship with other dogs in the future, and even if I don’t a normal connection is pretty darn rewarding too. But there definitely can be something different with some animals.
As far as the money - heart whatever should never be an excuse to be dumb, or to skimp in care for other animals you are responsible for. At the same time, that connection can make it harder to be sensible. Like I said, it was quite difficult to make the decision for my dog. So if someone is posting for advice about a heart horse, it at least makes it easier to understand why they are tempted to be stupid, and I might respond in a different way in terms of wording than otherwise.
But the relationship is not a good reason to make stupid decisions.
(I don’t really use “heart” whatever myself anyway. I might use it here because it is used to mean a specific thing on the forum, but I don’t go around in real life talking about my heart cat, etc.)
It’s easier to say Heart Horse (all kinds of emojis) than it is to say, “This one was/is my favourite.” It’s like giving it a name takes away (needless) guilt of having a favourite. I didn’t decide it was my favourite, it just sorta happened, lol, because you know, HEART HORSE!!!<3<3<3<3
I think it’s perhaps also a way of being competitive in horse relationships. Everyone has one, but my relationship with my horse is better/more special/deeper.
Kinda makes me think of the pubescent kid going through the “YOU JUST DON’T UNDERSTAND ME” phase while the parent looks on, rolls eyes, and thinks, omg kid, you’re finally feeling the rollercoaster of emotion that the whole rest of the world has felt at your age. lol
And now I shall duck and run by riding off on the best little pony a middle aged ol’ bag could ever have. She shits glitter and has wings. For realz.
All I can say is Walt Disney and the subsequent generations of “Spirit” and “Pink Pony”.
Bearcat, that guy is scary! His mascara is all smeared…
I’m kind of “meh” on the term, but I do believe in the concept. I’ve owned or leased at least 8 horses, and ridden hundreds on a prolonged basis. The horse I currently own is the only one that I put into what some people would categorize as a “heart horse.”
I can’t really explain it, but it is just different with him. It’s absolutely NOT all rainbows and butterflies - he’s actually a very difficult horse and can be a real prick. It’s not even really that I “love” him more than the others - it’s more like he’s exactly the horse that I’m supposed to have. I see a lot of myself in him. He’s improved me as a rider and as a person.
If the opportunity came up, I would take back any one of the horses I have owned, and many that I have leased for retirement. In fact, there are a few that I actively search for from time to time, and one that is presently owned by someone I know. I’ve told the latter owner that I would be happy to take the horse for retirement if she ever can’t keep him (and no, I don’t have my own place - I’d be paying retirement board somewhere). I love that horse (a lot!), but he still isn’t what I would consider my “heart horse.”
I feel similarly about the concept of soulmates. I think people who have never met a soulmate (I do believe you can have more than one soulmate, although I have only met one), don’t really understand that concept either. It’s definitely not that you would never date anyone else if something happened to your soulmate. There’s literally nothing negative or limiting at all about having a soulmate - if anything, I think it leads to a strange level of clarity about other aspects of life, including the concept of love in the absence of a soulmate relationship (which is also very real and not at all diminished by the fact that someone you love may not be your soulmate).
Basically - I don’t think terms like “heart horse” or “soulmate” take anything at all away from loving a person or horse that doesn’t fit into those categories.
This is what my husband plays for me every time I get a new animal. Because, you know, I love them so much!
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_GIyTFl4Cb4
As far as the whole “heart horse” thing? I would say that Abe is, but we never really connected when I rode him, he was kind of an idiot. :lol: But I love him to pieces and he loves to spend time with me. I’m certainly not offended by the term, though.
And yes for me at least “heart horse” is short hand for “horse of a lifetime” its that horse that really gets to you for whatever reason.
And just because I had one, and he passed away - doesn’t mean I won’t have another.
And lastly, for me, and I bet for many others (like some here have pointed out), that heart horse probably overlaps with a particular period of your life that made you open to such a relationship / bond etc.
[QUOTE=french fry;7764384]
Slight tangent: I don’t believe in soulmates either so this one is going over my head, sorry![/QUOTE]
Haha, soulmate and heart horses aren’t really something you believe in, like the tooth fairy or easter bunny. Its something that either happens to you - or doesn’t. You really don’t even have a choice in the matter.
I’ve had several horses over the last 19 years. Each was special to me and their quirks made them all the more so… but only one would I go through a brick wall for. He is so deeply special to me, I can honestly say I can die happy having had the pleasure of having him in my life.
Do I think the term is thrown around WAAAAAY too frequently, hell yeah. Do I think its often used as weak justification for stupid or selfish decision making. Absolutely.
Would I make a stupid decision on behalf of my heart horse? I like to think I’m older and wiser now and above irrational decisions, lets just leave it at that. : )
Welp, I don’t think it quite goes like that. While it is bittersweet to recognize you may not ever get to have this kind of relationship again … its satisfying on a greater level because you did.
Heart horses and soulmates - the real ones, not the majical butterfly farting ones - are not decisions you get to make. It either happens or… it doesn’t.
[QUOTE=buck22;7764702]
Haha, soulmate and heart horses aren’t really something you believe in, like the tooth fairy or easter bunny. Its something that either happens to you - or doesn’t. You really don’t even have a choice in the matter. [/QUOTE]
Yup. I have/had quite a few horses, too. And one I’ve really really clicked with. I adore the others, but the Red Menace is the One. As far as medical treatment/whatever/expenses, I use the same criteria as I do for the others. But he is special.
For those of you who don’t “get it” … get over it.
To me there is a difference between a favourite and a ‘heart’ horse/dog. It is a stupid term. But…
I have bred and owned many many dogs and many many horses. My current dog is the canine equivalent of a soul mate. None of the other animals can match the connection we have. I am not touchy feely. I am objective when it comes to what I can and cannot do for my animals.
Until I had this dog I was in the ‘I don’t get it camp’.
So its not that one is unfeeling if they dont’ have one. They just might not have met ‘the one yet’. I haven’t had a heart horse yet. I have owned or leased nearly 40 horses in my life. I have had ones that are special (I still own one in her mid 20s that I have had since I was a teen and she was 2) I have had favorites for sure. But none have had that connection that would qualify as a ‘heart’ horse.
I think those of us that don’t “get it” actually get it and the term just rubs us the wrong way, like being dragged through a thorny hedge backwards … wearing a sheer Velcro suit. :lol:
Aren’t there more important things to get worked up over besides what someone uses to describe a bond between themselves and an animal?
My first goat was absolutely a “heart goat” and her granddaughter is a “heart goat” too.
I’ve had three “heart dogs” and have a “heart cat.” I’ve yet to have a “heart horse” though I have two good ponies.
This does not mean I love or loved my other pets/livestock any less.
I certainly don’t need someone else’s permission to use whatever term I like, nor will I heed any ridiculous (even facetious) command to “stop it.”
COTH has reached a new low for me. Didn’t think that was possible.
I think I have a heart horse, but know I had a “heart dog.” There’s not a day that goes by that I don’t think of Bocephus and how he was cruelly taken away from me nearly a year and a half ago. It has also occurred to me that I would trade any animal I have (including “heart horse”) just to have him back. Losing Bo was like losing a family member. I had an insane amount of love for him.
[QUOTE=sascha;7764752]
I think those of us that don’t “get it” actually get it and the term just rubs us the wrong way, like being dragged through a thorny hedge backwards … wearing a sheer Velcro suit. :lol:[/QUOTE]
I would love to help you test that theory.
[QUOTE=OveroHunter;7764786]
I think I have a heart horse, but know I had a “heart dog.” There’s not a day that goes by that I don’t think of Bocephus and how he was cruelly taken away from me nearly a year and a half ago. It has also occurred to me that I would trade any animal I have (including “heart horse”) just to have him back. Losing Bo was like losing a family member. I had an insane amount of love for him.[/QUOTE]
I understand and emphasize. Two of my heart dogs perished in the fire that took everything I had two years ago. To this day I cannot think of them (or any of the dogs lost) for too long and would trade quite a lot to bring them back.
I’ll never understand another person’s need to wave their hands and scream out “Don’t do something I don’t like!” especially when it doesn’t actually harm them in any way.
Things like this can’t bother you unless you allow them to do so. Perhaps one should find something else to focus on. There are many things that can garner you more positive attention than attempting to control others around you.
I just saw this discussion and I feel sorry for you. Having grown up with ponies (and horses) my entire life, I’ve had just a few that were more special than the rest and YES, they were my passion and my heart ponies or horses. I consider myself beyond lucky to have had the bond I do/did with those special ones.
I do understand it. My first dog, Tonka, was my heart dog. I got her when I was 22 years old and we were together for 14 years. That dog was with me for so many of my “growing up” years, that she was just…special.
I have 2 dogs now, both of whom I adore/love/could brag on all day and are special in their own ways but Tonka was just different. Maybe because it was just the 2 of us for a lot of years? Maybe because I went through a couple tough times/life changes and she was the one constant I could cry to every day, and she could always make me smile?
I don’t know. I’m fairly certain I’m not explaining this very well…
[QUOTE=Laurierace;7764310]
I feel sorry for those of you who have never had one. I have been blessed to have two in my lifetime. No need to be bitter just because you are sitting on the outside however, there is still hope for you.[/QUOTE]
This. I was just thinking last night “I’ll never have another one like this”. He’s my heart horse. I feel sorry for the haters that don’t get it. Maybe one day…
I have had two heart horses, neither of which I have done anything stupid or irresponsible for. I’ve owned so many, but these two were just…different. Amazing creatures, for unexpected reasons.
I think you have to be open to it to have a relationship like that with anyone or any horse. But I do feel bad for those who have never experienced that attachment and love that’s is on a whole different level. I hope everyone gets to experience it at least once!
