Sweetie's Saga- Rest In Peace Sweet Mare

True, I swear I’ve seen some horses in recovery from colic surgery who just plain learn to hate people because of the constant fussing with them by well-intentioned owners. Give her some space, please.

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Maybe it’s just me, but the thought of doing any sort of “training” (clicker or otherwise) with a horse who hasn’t been properly taken care of to the point of emaciation gets my hackles up. I was lucky that my once in a lifetime gelding didn’t hate all humans after the treatment he required as a 3 YO. Fortunately he was a one in a million type on the personality chart, and seemed to realize we were all trying to help and kept his amazing disposition until the day he left.

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I got two horses from a rescue in 2003. One of them had clearly been abused, as he flinched every time anyone moved quickly near him. He was standoffish and would pull a mean trick occasionally (I have two flat toes thanks to him).

We were very patient and responded without emotion when he acted up. After a while, we suddenly realized we had a really good horse (as long as you didn’t try to ride him). My daughter suspected he had back problems at he clearly didn’t like her 60-ish pounds on him even bareback. So I made him a driving horse, and he was great at it–almost completely bombproof.

He turned into a major lovebug, and he spent his retirement years hanging out with me, often with his chin resting on my shoulder.

I think you are doing a great job prioritizing for your mare. She may come out of her shell as she starts feeling better. Poor thing has so many strikes against her right now.

Rebecca

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Even my very friendly curious outgoing mare will be reserved and inside herself if she’s feeling ill.

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I’m not a horse, but I’ve been sick with covid all week and was pretty dang miserable. I’m normally insanely affectionate with my boyfriend (who gave it to me), but if he had tried to cuddle with me or anything when I was at my worst I couldn’t have handled it. So I can totally understand mostly wanting to be left alone when you feel so cruddy. It sounds like she did try to say “thank you” today though!

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This mare knows she’s vulnerable and weak and for a herd animal that’s a huge mind bend. I have no doubt she’ll come around in time with the good hands she’s in now but her body has to catch up. I’m glad she has a patient capable owner; all will be fine.

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Reading your high compliments left me speechless, my humble thanks.

You do realize this is one of the nicest threads on COTH?
A guide to how to do right in this world for others, with utter consideration and sensibly use of knowledge acquired over long time you bring to the table.
Carefully listening to what all others have to add, still letting the professionals, the veterinarians, be the ones to direct to the very serious medical needs of this horse you found yourself fell into your hands.
The situation is ongoing, may be for a long time, results still to be seen, but no one could have done a better job, what a lucky mare that is.
Lucky all of us to learn from you how to balance a situation so well, so careful to consider the mare not only so she can have a chance to thrive, but also can be herself doing it.

I thank you for her, for letting us in your story, for all other horses that all of us are more aware of them in ways we may have not thought about before, for ourselves, given us more to ponder.
That is a bigger part of what COTH forums are all about.

Best luck with resting a bit, doing other, now that she is fairly stable and improving. :slightly_smiling_face:

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I’ve been following Sweetie’s saga since day one, rooting for her and you, @carman_liz the whole time. Bless you for taking her on.

I knew my 14-year-old gelding when he was born, and he was the friendliest, most in-your-pocket colt you could imagine. Loved people from day one.

One year later I went to see him with the intention of buying him, and he’d suffered the death of his dam, which meant early weaning, and then was thrown out back and virtually untouched (and unfed) for the rest of his first year of life.

When I went to pick him up to bring him home, he was half the size he should have been, ribby, wormy, and paid no more attention to people than he would a rock or a tree. This once friendly colt had no light in his eyes, no curiosity, no interest at all in human beings. It was so sad. He looked past people, through them, just didn’t acknowledge their presence at all.

It took some good, consistent feeding to get the light to come back into his eyes. Then he started slowly rediscovering those interesting two-legged critters he’d once enjoyed as a weanling. Eventually, he learned the joy of scritches. Then came treats. The rest was history.

Now he’s a 16+ hand tank of a lap dog who adores his humans and lets us know it daily.

Give your Sweetie time. She has to focus on survival right now. Once that is conquered, she’ll start looking outward again.

Bless her and bless you.

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I am…:grin: she gets scratches, some love just so she knows that she is safe and I’m going to be nice to her… she gets groomed, sheets changed, and she gets her food and then she is left alone. If I am working out in her lot picking up poop or anything if she wants to come up to me she can and if she doesn’t want to be bothered she just does her own thing.

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I am I just want her to feel safe for now.

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Totally agree, I’m sure even grooming, which is only grooming gloves softly and then a soft brush, mane n tail brushed and done, is not very comfortable for her right now. Still kicking her bad hind leg out when I clean and treat that hoof too. It is the only time I see any ‘mare’ come out, which is more of an “ow, ow, owww are you done yet woman I said this hurts!” Then even a real mare attitude.

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Aww ty so much!!

I don’t think she meant it in that way, just was trying to think of ways for me to interact with her a little more.:smiling_face_with_three_hearts: I do agree it is not what she needs right now. The smallest bit of push could stress her into going backwards with her recovery. As long as she stays calm and respectful thats all I can reasonable ask for right now.

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That’s so great that you guys listened to what he was trying to say and found a job for him that worked for everyone!

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My pony started out not liking people from all that he had to go thru as a foal, even now at 12 yrs old one of his quirks is you can go up to him in the field, if he has a halter on you can catch him, he will enjoy love n scratches, but if you have a lead rope n halter, he is not coming near you. To the point he will walk to the gate n his stall like ya , ya I know where I am supposed to go, I can do it myself!!! Think stuuarrt…look what I can do… let me do it download (9) mom!!!

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Oh I know, I try to remind myself that I need to think like a horse more with her. That they are prey animals and when they are weak they try not to draw attention to themselves or waste energy they need to survive.

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I think you and clanter could definitely could give me a run for my money on caring for her, but I admire both of you so much for everything you do for all of us on here. :smiling_face_with_three_hearts:.

I’m so surprised and thankful that no one has been rude on here, and there have been no arguments started. No one criticizing or saying I’m an idiot, I have only owned 2 easy keeper horses on my own at my little backyard barn, or I don’t know what I’m doing and how dare I even try she should just be put to sleep already… why am I making it worse for her or drawing this out?

I don’t know a lot or have tons of experience, but it’s like looking for a job…how can you get experience if no one will hire you? But I do have a stupidly huge heart, especially when it comes to animals, horses the most. I have finally hit the point in my life where I know sometimes everyone has to ask for help. Luckily I have people like you and others who have been so nice and supportive with only constructive critisism to reach out to, with the same big hearts!

A lot of the threads I see on horse care, not all…but many of them, have ended up derailing into arguments over what is best or who knows the most and I am insanely grateful that this has not turned into one of those.

Pics of the day, I let the girls take her out to graze for around 10 min and get to pet the horsies.

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Well, the only way to get experience is to get experience! Lovely pics there, does one good to see some bloom.

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I am glad you started this thread. I did not know about only feeding them lucerne or their body could turn on them.

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There’s definitely a gleam to her coat now!

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