Telling trainer I’m leaving

[findeight]

Just tell her you are moving out of state. Is she so crazy thats going to send her over the edge? Not like shes going to travel to you? Its possible, of course, but IME, its when you switch to a competing trainer in the local area toxic trainers really go off the rails.

If you are really concerned, arrange to ship the horse out the end of July, give notice and a check for August as you load up. Thank her fir all shes done for you, wish her well. Then GTHO.

Depending on your barn, you might want to not share your plans with fellow boarders, they’ll tell trainer and she could get ( justifiably IMO) upset you told everybody but her. Don’t do that. Sometimes when everybody in a sketchy, unsettled barn environment knows you are leaving, your stuff starts walking iff, they figure you wont miss it until after you are gone. Not talking about the trainer here, your dear fellow boarders.

This topic comes up on here often. Most of the time the shock is there no trouble and posters learn they were never friends, just a very small blip on trainers radar and not as important as they thought. Maybe financially important but personally, trainer couldn’t care less.

Don’t be afraid to act, its a positive change in your career and life. Keep you mouth shut, round up your stuff, slowly start taking it home for “cleaning” or repair and start arranging transport. Commercial haulers don’t have enough drivers, book well in advance.

And remember, its your life and your horse. You don’t owe her anything other then 30 days and polite thanks. Stop letting her control your emotions and enjoyment of your horse not to mention ruin your move.

And NEVER board/train anywhere with anybody without a signed CONTRACT again. That just enables sketchy barns and bad trainers to stay in business.

[trubandloki]

You are making Your life miserable!

You are moving. There is no more to this story than that. It does not matter how horrible of a trainer this person might be. It does not matter how you do not feel like you are wanted there anymore. It does not matter how your lessons went. You. Are. Moving.

When you pay your August board include a note. Something like - Dear Training I now Hate (that is where you put their name, clearly not what I wrote), Thank you for helping me with Dobbin all these years (months?). It has been an amazing learning experience (note, learning is not always just positive stuff, it sounds like in your case you have learned some things you do not want in a horse trainer). I am sorry to have to give you Dobbin’s 30 day notice, as you know I am moving out of state and taking Dobbin with me. As soon as I have an official date/time with the trucking company I will let you know the details, it should be towards the middle/end of this month. I look forward to our continued learning here until we leave.
Signed, freaking out horse owner.

Do make sure you have a trucking company available because sometimes those things are hard to organize for a certain date.

Edit to add: You will probably need a health certificate to move Dobbin to another state so be sure to have that arranged with the vet.

[Loudlaugh12]

THANK YOU.

This helps a lot.

This week, I’ll find out a firm date from new barn. The move is only a few hours. Once I have firm date I will arrange for shipper.

How hard is it to get health certificate? He’s up to date on everything and I have the coggins on hand.

[trubandloki]

@Loudlaugh12 do you have any contact with your horse vet? Just call them up and ask about how much notice will they need to schedule a health certificate for moving your horse. It is just a quick exam that the vet confirms the horse does not have anything contagious. Depending on when your coggins was done last, you might need a newer one of those too.

[Loudlaugh12]

I can most certainly call the vet. I don’t usually deal with vet (trainer does), but it’s my name on his record and invoice! Coggins is from May.

[trubandloki]

Google the state you are going to and see what is required to cross into it with a horse.

Edit to add: It is highly unlikely someone will be at the state border crossing checking these things, but still best to follow all the safety rules.

[findeight]

Ask your vet. Its 5 min plus a farm call, temp, respiration, no outward signs of illness. . Usually within 30 days of ship date. See if it can be done when vet is at barn so you can split the farm call charge.

If you aren’t going out of state and new barn and shipper do not require it!? You can skip it with a well cared for horse up to date on things. Its not at all like a PPE, just a quick observation.

[Loudlaugh12]

I think most commercial shippers want Coggins and health certification so seems like I’d need these things regardless. (As an aside, do people need a new health certificate every time they cross state lines to show…? I’m in New England so people show out of state all the time. That seems like a lot of vet visits if they use a commercial shipper)

[findeight]

No, except Florida and California, sometimes. But the rated and breed shows require them to get a stall and you don’t get your number until you present them, Some check random trailers driving onto the grounds, some check ALL at the entrance. Why most who show just carry them.

[ejm]

I don’t know if this is national, but in my area (VA and WV), you can get a 6-month health certificate and online coggins from your vet via https://www.globalvetlink.com/ and just log in and make out your own health certificate every time you ship somewhere.

[Loudlaugh12]

Yes that’s the exact link I have for my coggins. But I’m guessing if the health cert requires a vet visit if still need to schedule that?

[ejm]

Probably so. Call your vet’s office and ask. I just get it done when the vet pulls coggins every spring.

Good luck with your move.

[2DogsFarm]

@Loudlaugh12

I’m guessing if the health cert requires a vet visit if still need to schedule that?

Yes, vet needs to see horse to record vitals (temp, respiration) required for the Health Certificate < also called CVI = Certificate of Veterinary Inspection.
CVI also requires the address of the location horse is going to.
Most are good for 30 days from date horse is examined.
I used to load my horse for any out-of-state venture, then stop at the clinic where vet would examine horse still in the trailer & give me the completed form.

[wsmoak]

Yes, the vet will need to lay eyes on the horse in order to issue a health certificate. If you already use Global Vet Link that’s great – it will show up in the same place.

If you do not usually deal with the vet, and you call them now about this, word may get back to your trainer. “Oh, we can come do X and Susie called us about a health cert so we’ll do that on the same trip.” So you may want to delay that call until you give notice. The health cert usually has to be within 30 days anyway.

Then just keep it all business. Ask for your final invoice to make sure you are completely settled up on any incidental charges. Don’t voice any complaints about the trainer (other than here.) It’s not like the trainer can argue about this, you are not switching to someone locally, you are leaving the state.

[candyappy]

@Loudlaugh12

The irony is I’m a serious Grown Up with a Serious Grown Up job where I am highly respected. This whole situation has caused me so much stress I’ve had physical symptoms.

Lots of grownups are in toxic relationships because they allow themselves to be. You don’t owe this person anything. Give your notice and hopefully your next boarding/ training experience will be normal.

[Loudlaugh12]

Okay, this all helped me take a deep breath. Yes I have absolutely been enabling trainer AND allowing myself to remain in a toxic friendship as well. I barely gave details (too identifying if I said more) about poor treatment from trainer and if I actually shared more (and how she has treated me personally and not just “professionally”) you’d all be even stronger with your advice. I gave and gave and gave, both in the friendship and at the barn, and none of it was ever appreciated or reciprocated. My fault and I’ve learned.

[Knights_Mom]

Just tell her on the 1st of Aug you are leaving. Tell no one where you are going. Do not have farrier or anyone contact the new farrier etc unless it is absolutely necessary as you don’t want your new world to be poisoned by the old world. And it will be.

This is a business relationship. Do not tell these people - none of them - anything. Not to fellow customers, not anyone.

Under no circumstances tell anyone where you are going, who you are using.

Start moving your stuff beforehand very discreetly. Your prime directive is unto avoid drama.

[S1969]

@trubandloki

You are making Your life miserable!

You are moving. There is no more to this story than that. It does not matter how horrible of a trainer this person might be. It does not matter how you do not feel like you are wanted there anymore. It does not matter how your lessons went. You. Are. Moving.

This.

[Ruth0552]

Don’t be too hard on yourself. All first time horse owners need advice from someone. I’d guess that lots of us look back on some of our first mentors and think about what incredibly bad advice we got, or how some trainer really had no idea what they were doing, etc. Hindsight is 20-20. You can’t know what you don’t know.

In the future, I’d advise doing a lot of the vet/farrier contact yourself. I know at some barns it’s normal to have the trainer arranging all that stuff, but it completely baffles me.

I live in New England and I have never, not once, been asked for a health certificate. Oh, nope, I brought my horse on a weekend away trail-riding place in Vermont and they wanted one. A Health Certificate is different than a Rabies Certificate, by the way. If you are using Global Vet Link that Rabies vaccine will show up on your Coggins and can be used as both a Rabies Cert and a Coggins, but it is not the same as a Health Cert. The only place I have been asked for a Rabies Cert is in CT.

[js]

You will likely need coggins done within 30 days of your shipping date, you can get your health certificate at the same time you update your coggins. Call your vet and get a timeline on getting your paperwork, they can do a rush on coggins but will cost extra. Health certificate is done by the vet so doesn’t normally take very long. Find your shipper now, that may take more time to arrange then you think, finding one that can ship from/to your location can be tricky, so you need to be making arrangements now. If this is a short trip you may have better luck finding a local shipper that does smaller/shorter runs.