Also, we humans don’t always have the right tools in our proverbial toolbox for a particular horse. Doesn’t matter if you are a BNT or a backyard owner, no one is perfect for every horse in every situation. But when you make your living off your reputation as a horse trainer, it’s hard to admit that you may not be the right person for that particular animal. Or sometimes you may not realize it until the unexpected happens and you don’t know how to handle it.
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The confidence and charisma that makes many of the greats so memorable also seems to prime them for hubris. When their authority and respect is challenged a nasty side comes out for many of them.
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I guess I don’t parse that as applying only to the greats. Everyone is flawed and human. My Dad is confident and charismatic and absolutely loses his marbles when his authority and respect are challenged…and he was an inside sales rep for paper mill parts LOL
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Good to know. Thanks!
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I was at a clinic learning ground driving. My horse was a very good egg but he was being a bit resistant that day. The clinician had me keep pushing him until he had a melt down. She had us wait a few minutes and then we started the exercise again very slowly. It was like a light bulb went on in his brain. No resistance, no melt down, we completed the exercise and then she told us to quit for the day. And she said something like “make sure he knows what a good man he was today”. 
So no punishment, but if I was on my own I would have stopped too soon rather than giving him the time to make the mistake and learn from it. Maybe that’s what Ray was trying to show that horse but the horse escalated farther than expected?
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Ehh, I wish. The horse did cross the puddle, a couple of times. And another puddle a few yards away. The horse tried to meet him in the middle after some resistance, then he’d get stuck again. Back and forth and back and forth and finally he’s like wtf, no. All no. No more. Seeing her lose consciousness and fall off onto rock hard ground was unsettling.
Maybe Ray wanted to break through that FU wall for good. Maybe CD was trying to whack that gelding into forward gear if he’s learned to just squat and wait. I don’t know.
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Kathleen Raine was always happy to help Pony Clubbers too. I admire her very much.
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The same is true of your garden variety narcissist
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I love riding with: Bent Jensen, Conrad Schumacher, Adrienne Lyle, Gary Rockwell–all were very kind to my horses and helped me to ride better for the horse’s benefit. I have some very meaningful lessons with them that I am now applying to other horses and am very grateful. I also enjoyed Jeremy Steinberg and JJ Tate. I am looking forward to riding my 4 year old with Anna Buffini next month–I think she will be very kind to my horse. I would love to ride with Ingrid Klimke, Klaus Balkenhol, Guenter Seidel (I think I will get trickle down from Anna here) who has the most beautiful riding position of anyone I have ever seen. Carl would be fun to ride with, I think.
I am told that Warwick Schiller and Tristan Tucker are amazing. I would ride with either of them. WS was here in July but I wasn’t aware of it. I will get into his program and on his list. I love how he addresses trigger stacking in training. These programs are really important for you on the way to developing a relaxed and confident horse and harmonious relationship.
I have also worked with a sports psychologist and I think that is important if you are competing or even if you are not because it helps you focus on what you are succeeding at to make it solid and how to embrace your failures to learn from them.
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If it helps someone else like it helped me, that would be fantastic!
To clarify, the friend was a working student, so perhaps held to a different standard than paying students.
I agree – I doubt Lendon would toss rocks at customers!
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I mean, you don’t throw rocks at working students, either. Shoot, that’s almost worse.
Unless it was some sort of inside joke or something done in jest that has been miscommunicated. For example, my instructor, who is also a close friend, might make a joke, “I’m going to hit you with your whip next time you make a stupid mistake like that.” But she’s speaking in hyperbole and we’re both laughing because we know nothing about that statement is serious. She would never say that to a stranger. But an onlooker might take it out of context.
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I think this is true for many fields of endeavor, not just horse trainers. Politicians at all levels come to mind, but also top athletes and coaches in other sports, entertainers, business CEOs, tech geniuses, etc.
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I actually saw Lendon body shame a 14 year old girl at one of her clinics. In front of an audience. “I can tell just by looking at you that you aren’t REALLY serious about your riding”. The girl had a sturdy rather than slender build but was actually quite fit (unknown to Lendon she was also a barn worker and played other sports). The girl’s mother (also a rider) did step in and asked what a “serious” rider should be doing in terms of fitness training, briefly describing what her daughter already did. Lendon, who herself is now quite chubby, didn’t make a good impression on any of us who knew that girl. She also wasn’t asked back to that barn.
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In my youth there was a rather notorious lady who would carry a whip and if you didn’t listen you would be hit with it, notably on the hands. She was a very popular instructor and the opinion was if you got whacked then you deserved it. Times certainly change.
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Praises for that. Neither humans nor animals learn best through corporal punishment.
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What I’ve learned in various equestrian disciplines working with different trainers is to take what you like and leave the rest. I was never able to get everything I needed for me and my horses from just one trainer. This sounds obvious, but I got caught up in the hype about how great certain trainers are. Nobody knows your horse better than you do and you have to apply common sense to what you’re doing versus trusting/following blindly.
Also, from doing some natural horsemanship groundwork, I learned that ego and emotions like anger and frustration have no place in training horses. This is where a lot of BNTs (and humans in general) get into trouble. 
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Agreed. You never really know a trainer or their program until you work at their barn. Everyday you see their methods, attitudes, work ethic or lack thereof.
I have spent 4 years at barns and have fond memories. And 2 weeks at barns, leaving in the middle of the night to escape the rath of the trainer…
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Lendon Gray is one of the nastiest people I’ve ever met.
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Ouch! My friend, despite getting smacked with rocks, learned a lot from her…
I participated in a clinic for instructors with Lendon and it was very good. I left humbled, but wiser. We gave “lessons” to other participants with Lendon observing and giving advice/criticism. Helpful and eye-opening.
I wish I knew then what I know now. I might have made a better impression.
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