The Maestro has written another book

Love red heads. I have one too. She’s a diva…

In the style of https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CsdtYzjOfUU, my redhead loftily leg yields down the diagonal while the school horses in the lesson (boys…ewww) are doing perfect circles as per the exercise…a good school horses do.

We don’t do group lessons any more….:innocent:. TeeHee…

Gotta love red heads. :rofl:

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Who here would like to read this absolute blockbuster? PM your mailing address and I’ll send it along.

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Wait! Are you certain you have considered all your options?!?

  1. Mail it to Nick, complete with your personal info and return address, so he can sign it and send it back to you. What a treasure! Just imagine how you’ll impress your friends!

  2. Keep the copy so you can hold living room wine fests and perform “read aloud” selections for your distinguished guests.

  3. Take a selfie holding the book and see how that whole Free T-Shirt Offer works out. (Then wear the shirt at work/in a lesson/to any equestrian competition and report back to us).

  4. Just for giggles, show up at the next Robert Dover book signing and thrust Nick’s book forward, smile sweetly and ask Robert if he’d be so kind as to add a personal notation to the inside cover of Nick’s book.

  5. Carry book to safe, open area. Light match and apply to pages. Allow book to burn, combusting all that negative energy and releasing its bad mojo back into the dark side of the universe. (Chanting and burning of incense encouraged).

:grin:

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:joy::joy:

:heart::sunglasses:

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Oh, number four. Somebody please do Numb. 4

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Please do this one! And take video. Pretty please!

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Don’t do number 6! I paid a good $20 for that book! Well, if you chant and burn incense AND do it on a cold night to warm your hands (so the book actually helps you momentarily) AND spread the ashes into a forest somewhere to recycle the carbon for good, I’d agree.

PLEASE do number 4. Then either send it back to Nick or take a selfie with the book AND a selfie with the comments from RD so you can test #3.

For the second option, it might add to the experience to read the passages or a chapter aloud and let your friends role play the parts. Or share the chapter with a couple of friends in advance and have them role play the chapter. Wine should be involved.

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Oooh! Oooh! Can I play the role of that lady from Dressage at Devon who was tasked with writing the letter to Nick, informing him that the Chevy’s Cup was no longer being presented due to lack of payment (on his part)? Because I feel that I could lend a tone of tactfully concealed general annoyance to my voice whilst also rolling my eyes in an expression of contempt and mild disgust.

It’s either that or I wanna play the gun wielding security guard at Devon. I’ll mimic a surly growl and even bring my own scarlet windbreaker!

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I really love you guys…

:grin::heart:

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Oh wait, I want to be the security guard at Devon. I’ll practice a growl and wrestling down a teen. But OK, you win. I’ll be the teen groom who calls you because Nick is bothering me as I prepare a FEI horse for competition. My eyes aren’t rolling enough in my eye sockets now but I swear I’ll practice it for a teen merely presenting a FEI horse for major competition at DaD. I’ll be sure to include a cell phone and A Tik Tok video and chew gum to illustrate Nick’s point. THEN, I’d like to contrast that performance with a real groom at a FEI competition. You take Nick down either way. I’d reward you with either gum or thank you for ensuring a clean drug test for my charge.

I’ll bring a bottle of wine to your gathering!!

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But can I include making a ham-fisted threat of physical violence? Because that’s what really sells that scene!

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Yeahhh! “Real Grooms of LA or AZ or wherever” Oh, we’d make a ton of $$ from Netflix. The Drama!

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May I please play Gifted, umm, sorry, I mean Talent? I’ m the wrong sex, but I had a beautiful pony tail when I was young, so I think I could rock the part.:racehorse:

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There’s no way I would want to be in any proximity to RD when this pox’s name was mentioned, let alone utter it myself. Noooooo.

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“This pox”…

:joy:

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Wait! I have a 7th option: use it as the basis for writing a new musical! I can see it now.

“Maestro: The Musical.” Featuring Tony-Award winning songs such as “Chevy My Love,” “You’ve Got a Friend in Trump,”, “Bathrobes,” and “I’m Batcrap Crazy (But I’m Not Throwing Away My Shot)”, this is the heartwarming story of one man’s disillusionment with the establishment and his triumph over the evil COTH Cabal. Full of toe-tapping numbers and heart-stirring moments, this is THE musical of the year!

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oscars-standing-ovation

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Soon our friend Nick will have to add to the paragraph at the bottom of his website that none of his works are to be adapted into Tony Award-winning musicals without his consent.

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Willing to get flamed for making this observation, but I keep seeing like 500+ new responses to this thread, which I am not following. Out of curiosity, I opened it today and scrolled to the bottom to see if perhaps it had veered off into another discussion like the old revived Western Dressage thread. But it hasn’t. It’s still all about trashing this person (whom I know nothing about other than what I’ve read on COTH). All I can think is how gleeful he must be that he has taken up rent-free residence in so many people’s brains. This individual, his laughable attempt at writing a book, and his other outrageous antics should be entirely ignored. He will go away if so. But over 2700 comments on this one thread about him?! Just so weird. OK. Sorry to troll on in. I’ll go back to ignoring the thread.

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Of course you can!

Maybe your scenes can in part be shot like this:

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