In absolute awe of your honesty and bravery, Jair. You should be so very very proud of yourself.
I don’t think so!! Not on this board anyways! Right Heidi? 
But yes, we do try not to go overboard considering our good consortium of great juniors!
And the plaid is from the Gap Missy! So there! 
But seriously, thank you for you words BronkBusterTX. You will find that there are so many great people here on the BB! I had no idea until I started posting, that a forum could be such a great place to meet wonderful people! Stick around and you’ll get to special people like Heidi even better!
(and no, Alice for a book is not an even trade! But nice try Heidikins!)
Lately I’ve been spending way to much time on a board where too many people hide behind anonymous postings and sling cr*p at each other. The hatred on that board is tangible. Then I come home to the COTH BB and sigh in absolute joy and relief at the open-minded love-in going on here.
Jair, my favorite book for years has been The Front Runner! It was so helpful when I was trying to learn all about homosexuality when people in my college circle started coming out. Billy Sive… a hero for all time. Maybe NOW they’ll finally make the movie??
My favorite quote:
You can be anybody that you want to be
You can love whomever you will
You can travel any country where your heart leads
And know I will love you still.
You can live by yourself
You can gather friends around
You can choose one special one
And the only measure of your worth and your deeds
Will be the love left behind when your gone
Some girls grow up strong and bold
Some boys quiet and kind
Some race on ahead
Some follow behind
Some grow in their own space and time.
Some women love women and
Some men love men
Some raise children and
Some never do
You can dream all the day
Never reaching the end
Of everything possible for you.
“Everything Possible” is a lullaby that was commissioned by a lesbian when she realized there were no gay-themed songs to sing to her son. It was also the signature song of the Flirtations (a gay group).
Group hug and second verse of Kum-ba-ya
No tasteless would be me saying, “Jair rocks!” (because he’s a geologist).
That was fab Jair, you’re awesome!!
RF 
Bob, you and I have met in person, and I like you and your wife very much. But I strongly disagree with you very much on this issue.
I asked you to post something supportive on the Hayden thread because I thought it would be good for him to have additional support and input from a straight male who rides hunters and jumpers, and I do appreciate that you did that. I asked you to become involved not knowing this is how you felt about the topic, and that is my fault.
The only reason this subject is being discussed on these boards is because of the situation with a young teen who expressed his extreme confusion and doubts about himself, arising in part because of his love for horses and hunters, and the fact that it is a sport largely dominated by females and not treated as a “guy’s sport” by other teen agers in this country. Jair was trying to be supportive, and I personally very much appreciate his efforts and caring.
As I just posted on another thread, this is not going to become a gay and lesbian BB. It is and shall remain a horse BB. We most certainly have differences, even profound differences, in our feelings on any number of topics outside of horses. But we do love our horses and our sport, so whatever our other differences we have that in common.
Please, don’t let this thread degenerate into name calling and social debate, away from the caring purpose for which it began.
Maybe someone (with more time than me! ) can dig up that great “Open Discussion” thread from a ways back. That was a great discussion of this topic…
Jair - Sheesh, I go away for a long weekend and look at the controversy going on here. I guess Bobo’s response to your thread is a tiny example of some of the hurdles thrown your way.
I would like to add my thanks for your compassionate honesty. I don’t know if the person asking for advice is a troll or not, but for you to try to reach out and lend support shows what KIND of person you are, not what TYPE. Gay or straight, I don’t really care. Caring or cruel is what matters to me.
virtual hug
here is the link to Open Discussion
http://chronofhorse.infopop.net/2/OpenTopic?q=Y&a=tpc&s=691099205&f=602099205&m=909094705
Well said, LaurieB.
When I as a heterosexual woman go to the movies, I look at Michelle Pfeiffer or Julia Roberts and think, “wow, she’s a really beautiful woman. I’d love to have her checkbones/figure or whatever.” When I look at Tom Cruise or Pierce Brosnan, I have totally different thoughts about what I’d like to have. But like you say, that’s what is perfectly natural for me, not a choice I have consciously made or could consciously make.
When you see how so many homosexuals suffer with coming to terms with themselves and with society, it’s simply not a choice that anyone would willingly make. 
Jair you are a very strong, very brave individual and serve as a wonderful role model to everyone out there! I hope Haydon and any one else in his shoes will be helped with your inspiring posts and that they do the most important thing; to be true to themselves.
big hug for everyone, little tighter squeeze for Jair
Two of my close friends are gay and I couldn’t picture my life without them, they mean the world to me and for them to be unhappy would kill me inside. For them to deny what they are would be lieing to the world but most importantly lieing to themselves and you can’t live like that.
You should not have mentioned that name! Now I’m having unclean thoughts!
Robby my mind is always in the gutter!
And my dad is WAY COOL! Thanks for the nice words. He thinks I’m pretty special. (Don’t think I don’t take advantage of that!)
Just so you know, the name is after those toys…well really their slogan, one I try to emulate in my riding and my everyday life.
“Weebles wobble but they don’t fall down!”
It’s 2002 and I can’t believe this is still an issue, Why? I have been around the Hunter /jumper world since I was a small child in the 60’s and I know there were plenty of Gay men and women back then, but who cared, maybe because I was a child I only noticed the kind of rider a person was. What difference does it make, a persons sexuality doesn’t make them a better rider or give them a set of hands. It has nothing to do with the kind of teacher or trainer you are. My gosh when in the world are we all gonna get over ourselves, we are all just people how can one person judge another or even have the right to over something such as trival as this. How is the human race going to survive if after all this time we still concern ourselves with such petty discrimination and hate. Sometimes I think God created the animals with more brains then he gave humans, our horses only judge us by the softness of our hands and the kindness of our voices, ( and LOL the amount of treats we give them).
You almost made me cry Kennett Square, mon cherie.
Thank you jreventer, Maria, DQwanabe, Portia for your words. Thanks too to Rags and Regalmeans - how nice to hear that sort of sentiment from the younger generation.
I am at a loss to express how you are all making me feel. But I feel compelled to thank everyone personally each time you contribute to this thread although I am starting to feel embarassed at such kindness 
and don’t know what to say anymore.
Too bad Robby is away - he would know what to say!!
Since I’m not nearly as eloquent as the rest of you, I’ll let a quote from a book written by one of my favorite authors do the talking.
Note: the word “shay’a’chern” in this book means gay.
<BLOCKQUOTE class=“ip-ubbcode-quote”><font size="-1">quote:</font><HR>
“I know the natural world as only one who wishes to restore it to its rightful balances can. This is the thing I wish to tell you; in all the world, there are more creatures than just man that make lifetime matings. Among them, some of the noblest - wolves, swans, geese, the great raptors - all creatures man could do worse to emulate, in many, many ways. And with all of them, all, there are those pairings, from time to time, within the same gender. Not often, but not unheard of either.”
Vanyel found himself unable to move, and unable to anticipate the direction this was taking.
Now Moondance dropped his eyes to catch and hold Vanyels in a joining of glances and wills that was unbreakable.
“There is in you a fear, a shame, placed there by your own doubts and the thoughts of one who knew no better. I tell you to think on this: the shay’a’chern pairing occurs in nature. How then, ‘unnatural’? Usual, no; and not desirable for the species, else it would die out for lack of offspring. But not unnatural. The beasts of the fields are innocent as man can never be, who has the knowledge of good and evil and the choice between, and they do not cast out of their ranks the shay’a’chern. There was between you and your partner much love - only love. There is no shame in loving.”
“This I think I have learned: where there is love, the form does not matter, and the gods are pleased. This I have observed: what occurs in nature, comes by the hand of nature, and if the gods did not approve, it would not be there. I give you these things as food for your heart and mind.”
<HR></BLOCKQUOTE>
I forgot to put the name of the book and the author. The book is Magic’s Pawn, by Mercedes Lackey. This is a great book! Read it!
now doesn’t that sound wierd? (Please try and keep an open mind, you guys! Why does it sound wierd?)
Seriously, Jair, I’m going to have to look for you in the local shows, you leftcoaster you, so I can shake your hand.
Quote:- I am not a stereotypical, limp wristed, flutey voiced, caftan wearing and flower arranging gay man that you may be thinking of, and scared of becoming.
So now I wonder, “What does Jair have against Truman Capote?”
As much as I love Red Green, whose uniform you seem to resemble, it really doesn’t matter to me how straight or gay or butch or femme a person wants to appear. The rest of your eloquent post proves it is NOT clothes that make the man, or woman,and that is another one of the things I love about English horsesports. We all dress the same. And man or woman, we all compete on an equal basis. Wish t’were so in the rest of our world.
:* (ok, we don’t have a smilie for a kiss, so there it is!)
Bobo, what is the deal with you? How can you say that Jair is self-aggrandizing? Looking for a pat on the back? Please! He was only looking to help a young kid realize that he was not the only one in the world who had it rough.
That you would find fault in this surprises me. And there is an old saying…Thou dost protest too much…
Hey, we are all human beings living on the planet earth and we are all OK!!!
Thanks for the post Jair, I think you are a pretty cool person!
