Update pg 100-Erin sends the thread over the Rainbow Bridge. It had a good life...

[eventable]

Sorry Jetsmom, I’m only an eventing (and sometime H/J) trainer. And we don’t believe in dressage. However, I used my psychic circle buddies to channel Reiner Klimke, and here is what he said:

“To have ze pure dressage, you must first be forvard. If you are not to be haffing ze forvard movement, zen you shall not to be haffing ze good dressage. Aber if you haff ze forvardness, dann kann you have ze good dressage marks. Iffen sie haff ze good movement, aber es ist nicht forvard, dann kann you haff not so good ze marks. BUT, iffen sie haff ze forvardness, aber nicht ze good movement, sie kann dann haff ze lots of schooling mit die cavaletti, so much to establish ze good movement. Dann kann sie haff ze good movement und die besten marks. Aber iffen sie ist nicht die grand prix dressage queen, dann kann sie haff not so good ze movement, iffen sie just stays in the arena, dann kann sie score”.

Capisce?

[DeLapp512]

snor-kal and i do not stoop to ‘vaulting’…it is an inferior sport! duh!

i’m flying over via my lear jet. sorry, no room for anyone else, as i will have snor-kal with me as well as the spirit of ju-ju, which takes up a lot of space. so there…

what are the classes again? i need to start practicing…

[horse_poor]

OK fine, I am not going to come to your dumb BBQ because MY BNT SAYS THE SHOE SIZE DOES NOT MATTER!!!

I pushed her a bit to ask why and she said that if a horse has the right size shoes on, it can walk pretty good and then the meat gets tough. If they have the wrong size shoes on then they don’t walk so much and then the meat is more tender.

Duh duh DUH!

[DeLapp512]

even TABLE; you may want to reconsider who needs to go to the loony bin…see horse_poos post…

whew…

good job horse_poo…

[mcm7780]

I was hoping we could get Michael Jackson to play at prom…or MC Hammer…

Will this be a White Trash Prom? Or should it have a different theme? Any suggestions?

Oh, I guess I kinda want to be on the Prom Committee! Where do I sign up/apply?

[eggbutt]

Delapp has lost it!! The teacher is going to put her in time out if she’s not careful! I’m telling that she’s violated some kind of parelli thing or something and wants to go to Southern Dakota.

Hmmm…I’m beginning to feel a bit woosey and queazy after several boxes of Smegma Cooler. I think I’ll lay down under my desk for a few minutes.

[eventable]

MCM I’ve PTed you with pics of one of my fattening prospects. He’s not for sale, but I have his full mother-cousin also, who is competing in first year green classes on the lead. But last year she won the AA national title, so I think she’s almost ready to move up and do the off lead junior classes. This is NOT an ad.

[eggbutt]

oops…was that last post off topic? Sorry…can’t keep up anymore!

[eventable]

I am the BNT and I refuse to be fired. If I am fired, I will file off your hooves during the night and barbecue you along with your dog. Then I’ll invite all my friends over and we’ll haul your sofa out of the living room and use it as the focal point of a jump course in your back yard. Say goodbye to your begonias…mwahahahaha.

[jetsmom]

Sorry I’ve been gone for a while. I made the mistake of reading the “Not for the weak stomach-WTF” thread and decided to experiment to add some excitement for Mr Jetsmom and me…
So First I bought a duck. Not just ANY duck. This was the Marilyn Monroe of ducks. I took it to an expensive bird vet for a check up, but I think the vet was a Quack. Then I stopped by Walgreens and Picked up the “Warming KY jelly”. Well, that was a mistake. There we were…Me in my Dairy Milk maid outfit and Mr Jetsmom in his farmer overalls with one pissed off duck, and gooey feathers stuck everywhere! THen the “Warming” part kicked in and the ducks A$$ started to get the same smell,( minus the A la 'Orange sauce) as the duck dinner in the French restaurant we like to visit. We now had 1 bare a$$ed, irate duck in a feather-strewn house. The duck got loose, so we just opened the doors figuring he’d leave. Unfortunately, at about the same time a flock of migrating ducks was flying by and heard the comotion and started coming into the house. Then the local PETA rep was driving by and saw the duck-catastrophe. He quickly organized a sit-in protest with 18 other PETA supporters. The neighbors saw all of the people and smelled burning duck and thought we were throwing a party, and didn’t invite them so they called the police. The police showed up and took one look at my milking maid outfit and MR Jetsmom’s overalls, the 18 people sitting out front and all the ducks and they thought we were running a farm without a proper business license so they fined us 1500.00.
It took me 3 days to remove all of the ducks and feathers, and I hadn’t had a chance to ride, so when I finally did, I got bucked off. My Dr recommended water therapy, so we flew to the Bahamas and went snorkling. That’s where I saw the Bottle Nosed Dolphin…
I remembered that Dolphins are supposed to be fun…
So I quickly pointed him out to Mr Jetsmom. We got the brilliant idea of rubbing tuna all over Mr Jetsmom’s body to attract the Dolphin. Once properly scented, Mr Jetsmom dove into the sea seeking aquatic bliss. Well, you know what else likes Tuna??? Manatees. You know those 800 lb slow moving mammals that look like a cross between a walrus and a brick wall…Yeah, them. Well, that 'ol Manatee sure took a liking to Mr Jetsmom. Last I saw, they were heading out somewhere into the Gulf Stream with Mr Jetsmom screaming… Me? I’m back home with a really nice tan, waiting for the life insurance to pay up, so I can purchase some more Gypsy Vanners.

PS- the duck says Quack!

[eggbutt]

Bye Holly Jeanne

See you on I40 at mile post 332.

[horse_poor]

OK Even if I could ride Rothina, I wouldn’t because of the heat. Besides, maybe I can’t even ride at all. SO I guess it is a good thing Rothina is out of commission…

Freedom, I think we should give you the heads from the resque. And I am sure we are resqueing someone you know-we do not discriminate.

The Spaghetti Junction show is winding down-we are preparing for the Coming-Home-From-Up-North-Traffic-Jam Grand Prix-the course is very challenging and gives riders many on ramp and over pass options. Be sure to keep you reye on the Amber Alert boards for the most recent scoring!

And my BNT, Judge Judy, said that even if some of you beat me and Pees O’ Sheet in the classes we entered, we still win because she said so.

[eggbutt]

OK - I vote for Buff to be the head honcho in planning the prom…I want to know EVERYTHING NOW! All the details, quickly, quickly, quickly…we also need to make it horsey matter somewhat too don’t we?

<span class=“ev_code_RED”>off topic a bit…after seeing “war of the worlds” this weekend, I can’t help but picture THOSE tripods at our prom!! - back to our haze of a drug induced thread</span>

Hmmmm…military men from behind in chaps. I need to sit back and imagine that for a moment…ok, that was cool.

ALL the military men in NC are lining up to be escorts because of all the fun they had at the I-40 dressage-a-thon last weekend. They’ll probably decorate their humvees too.

Naters, which hangar did ya’ll use for your prom?

[Helen_of_NC]

And need I mention… the batteries are dead.

[Helen_of_NC]

Considering he’s rafting the rivers of Alaska right now (having survived the glacier climb), he’d have to take one mighty big wrong turn…

Oh, and he’s rather attached to that facial hair of his… and I seem to recall an expressed preference for a less hirsute model.

If he only knew what his mom was up to in the way of offering him up in a VERY public forum, on this of all threads… dear God!!!

[DeLapp512]

mcm - i told my roomate about naming the kitty resque…i even went into the story about it…and this thread…she just looked at me like i was crazy…

which even TABLEs already suggested that i be admitted into the looney bin. so yeah.

[RHF_cSi]

the shed is in the crap hole of mississippi, i think there may even be some squirrel in it! They even play hill billy music and there toilets are in shower stalls, and the mens toilet is just a big water trough with a drain!! you have to eat outside by the bon fires unless you want to be cramped inside at the bar. And they come out with your food and scream you name when it’s ready! It also comes it black stryfoam
boxes.
I will definitly have to see your prospects it may bring a whole new life to the shed

[DeLapp512]

mcm - you can meet me there at 4…yep, you can smoke cigars. my “uncle” joe bob smokes em all the time in the trailer. covers up that nasty ciggarette smell.

ok, well i gotta go finish glueing the rhinestones from the craft store onto my left pump.

[FindersKeepers]

its all about the basics, and with your new foal, you’re going to be doing a lot of flatwork at the beginning, so stay with your BNT, thats the ticket to the olympics anyway.

[sleepdeprived]

Eggbutt, Oreo feasting is reserved for the officials but since you are a big sponsor (and got the helicopters to donate their time) you are officially an official. And I thought Wagner was an eggcellent choice as well.

But is anyone else having difficulties with infopop? What the HeLL is wrong with this site. Erin, can’t you do something about this? Does every one (and I mean EVERYone) have this problem? I am on an ultraMAC G6 with 2,0000000000000000000000000.50 using
OS 15.777 with a Pentium 9 zigagig powered harddrive? It’s driving me nuts. Mods, can’t you do something as this is most inconvenient when you are trying to drink and drive and watch for low overhangs so Oreo doesn’t get flattened like a pancake before we can put him on the spit.