I’ve been thinking a great deal about you the last couple of days Jennasis and re-thinking your previous thread about promotions/raises.
Given the events of the past two days, I’d argue there isn’t enough money in the world for those who perform your job. I know that I, for one, could not do it.
As others have noted, you are only human and I imagine that much of the ‘numbness’ you’ve experienced is a self-protective measure - I mean, how are we to react when we witness people plummeting 80 stories to their death, a building, hell a monument, engulfed in flames and crumbling to a pile of ashes?
You are performing a valuable job Jennasis - at the same time, if you are unhappy with your job, make a change.
Take care of yourself out there and know that there are many of us who wish you well.