Tis true, now that he knows that I’m skinny, but flabby, duct-taped, padded, and share Wayne Newton’s penchant for an artifically-encased abdomen, he’s asked me to marry him.
Should he buy me Tiffany’s Lucida emerald cut diamond, 2 carats set in platinum or should I settle for a cluster from Walmart?
Who’d like to be in our wedding party?
Wingsy, my mother’s not invited.
You people are TOO funny! What a riot!
Thanks for brightening my otherwise dreary day!
“The simple truth is never simple and rarely true.”
-Oscar Wilde
You know, that picture is a really bad sign of things to come. I mean if Heidi has already practiced her African Shrinking Head spell on me, I shudder at what on earth is next.
Cactuskate, Cactuskate, Cactuskate… you speaketh of what you doth not know. Kiss me Kate, and I shall educate you farther 
I thought Jair was purchasing a nice indoor ring for you Heidikins!! 
Well if you are taking off with Jair I get Hans!!!
I don’t think I saw anyone else ask for him yet.
Don’t you settle for that Walmart stuff, at least make him get it at Target (or as we in New Joisey call it, “TarJay”. It gives it that upscale French flair)
“May the happiest days of your past be the saddest days of your future.”
And may you shower with a cattle prod, VT. You jealous, evil wench, how dare you spread such lies about my uber-glorious self. I left the feed trough an hour ago! 
I fear I shall be put into a spell with the “kiss” and then end up on the 7 Dwarfs thread.
Oh my…what is a girl to do?
And such infidelity so soon after the ceremony. Dast I tempt the wrath of heidi? Me thinks not.
“The older I get, the better I used to be, but who the heck cares!”
Robby and I could provide quite a nice repast if we put our heads together!
By the way, how is the mumpy bumpy Sumo Toddler doing?
But heidi dear, what are those little brown bags protruding from your Gucci bag? I didn’t think your trusted dog was allowed THAT MANY doggie bags?
You will look so stunning in those FULL seats. They will hardly show the padding.
“The older I get, the better I used to be, but who the heck cares!”
You know the saying that dogs start to resemble their owners? Here’s a picture of our expanding brood.
P.S. Kate you are a wise woman. 
ohhhh, congrats Heidi. The bigger the better, right? hehehe. Have you set a date yet?
Member of the Baby Greenie Support Group of North America
“GOD BLESS AMERICA”
I get my jollies and suddenly you want a ring?
Get real Heidi. I mean really, what were you thinking? Geesh, if that’s the way it goes, I’d be playing house with Sea Urchin right about now
Sigh, I am a gentleman though so I suppose I’ll get you a ring. I’m going to the dentist this afternoon, maybe he’ll have one in his goody tray.
Hey! Do they have Cracker Jacks up there in the Frozen North?? I hear you can get really cool rings sometimes as the prizes…
Bulletin Board Goddess
In the section on swine, they’ve got terrific bargains on nose rings.
Is a terrible and frightful thing; why, just ask Davidgud.
Why else would he be prowlin’ the Colin-salad-bar rather than enjoying the delicacies of the Heidi-banquet?
Jair, if you know what’s good for you, you’ll have to do better than a ring fashioned from your old steel braces.
I thought there was a reason they called you rock-boy.
Cactus, you crafty thing you. The doggie bag is for the birthday boy, Sea Urchin. He’ll have to put in his teeth, though, if he wants to snack on the peanut brittle that Wingsy’s prepared for the reception.
Jair
I am very disappointed that you only offered Heidi a 2 karat ring. She is worth at least a 4-5 karat rock
3:00pm today.
Tin, you don’t mind mint-green satin do ya?
Mumpy-Sumo is much better, Wings. The swelling’s almost completely disappeared and he’s been practising the phrase, “hi Daddy Jair, buy me a Porsche”.
Ah yes, peanut brittle, so much more practical than those fru-fru pastel butter mints. Yuk.
It will be a glorious occasion, I anxiously await the photos.
“The older I get, the better I used to be, but who the heck cares!”
Ooooh, jsg, you’re making this Swiss fraulein blush!
Think I may have to annul the marriage to the 2-carat rock boy and marry you instead. jsg, that does stand for Just Soooo Generous, right?
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