Agreed!
At 90 days under saddle, my horse had many more days worked with in hand and not ridden than under saddle. Of course she was 3 1/2, not 4 1/2, so we did less physical effort for her in our rides. She took about 6 months to be calm and ready to work basically when you got on, so a lot of those 6 months was time walking on a loose rein until she mentally settled in to that day. She probably went out on the trail alone or with other horses more than half the rides she had - I saw my trainer opening the gate on her when I pulled up at the end of ride #3. That time out of the arena was very important to me.
At 90 days, when working - we did not do smaller circles than 20m in general. We were not showing the impulsion you’d want at training level, because she was super butt high, and we kept her steady and slower so she could balance instead. She naturally had a high tempo, so we were trying to teach her to slow and relax. For a horse who is slower and more relaxed, plus more physically developed, I would expect to see higher levels of impulsion.
My trainer also starts horses in a cavesson rein - just a regular noseband with rings for reins. By 90 days we were using the bit rein, but still had the noseband rein available.
For reference, this was more like 75 days under saddle, but number of rides in the 20s. I think it was my third time on her. I can’t quite tell, but I think I’m using the bit rein mostly. She’s not quite accepting the bit yet, just learning how - and using the cavesson then moving to the bit seems to work well to help them get there easily.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=stA4zLdfL7E
At 90 days, she certainly understood the basics of balance and different aids, but she wasn’t consistent, of course. The description of your friend’s horse sounds like it’s not a dressage trainer, just an “english” trainer, maybe? My trainer knows where he wants to go, so he teaches horses to bend and move off aids properly from the start. It just makes it easier as you go. Most other trainers don’t, and just a solid citizen would be what I’d hope for, and know that’s not going to happen with all horses in 90 days, either.