When you realize you suck....

[Bigbutt]

After spending 40 years around horses, with horses, owning and riding - I find my own riding journal has given me the proof I need that riding is just my arch nemesus… no matter how much I enjoy it.
History - only had lessons as an adult since 2008. And at that it was like once a week for a couple of years. I’m a smallish adult (5’3 / 120 lbs) and was riding a full clyde (18 hh)at that time and jumping him around 2’3 - 3’0. The coaching I would say was sub par at best.

Move to the last 3 years in which I’m still riding a large clyde/tb cross (17 hh) since he was 2 years old… changed coaches and had a new good coach but suffered a serious injury that had me out of the saddle for 4 months. Then I was back in the saddle for a month only to suffer another injury that knocked me out of the saddle for another 4 months. This takes me to I’d say the last year and a half where I’m with a great coach, riding 5 days a week, and taking a 1 - 2 lessons a week.

The last month and a half I’ve had off due to a barn move, so now I’m back in the saddle. And once again struggling and feeling like everytime I take more then a week off I’m starting back at scratch.

Anyhow thats the short and dirty of the history… which takes me to me finding my riding journal from 2008 (while riding the full clyde/crappy coaching) only to see that the notes I took on the items that I had to work on, are STILL the same items that I today 6 years later I am still struggling with and still hear this coach say.

My coach now says I’m too hard on myself (and I’ve heard that from others also) and there has been improvements - but to find this journal makes me feel frustrated. Part of me wonders if the big horse syndrome that I seem to have isn’t helping the situation at all, as a number of the issues have to do with my position. I’m going to try a pony this weekend during a lesson to see if maybe something more suitable to my size will help. And part of me says I should just give up on riding and maybe looking at breeding agility goldfish.

Guess I don’t know if I just need to vent, or if others have gone through the same frustration and how do you get over it.

[AlexS]

Oh goodness, you certainly are hard on yourself. What’s your ultimate riding goal?

It’s hard to overcome muscle memory, and I’ve been without lessons for a few years now, and developed a chair seat. In fact, it’s so normal to me that as soon as someone gets out a camera I move my heels back, as I never want to see another photo of that again.

Lighten up on yourself a bit, and try to make it fun again.

[Zu_Zu]

Perhaps a group dinner after your lesson to ‘lighten’ the perspective ?!~!?

Sounds like you are working diligently and consistently on ‘beating yourself up’ for no good reason :lol:

Riding is obviously a passion for you `` can hear it in your words.

Just cut yourself some slack … perhaps a riding group dinner after lessons … holiday beverages :winkgrin:

Just ride … Just enjoy !!!

Your enthusiasm will catch up with you again soon ~

[B]btw I breed and raise and show agility goldfish ```` it’s something special !

If you are interested in purchasing a ‘school’ just pm me and your

[/B]Christmas can be ORANGE ! :winkgrin:

[OnDeck]

I miss, a lot. I usually stick an extra stride in where no stride belongs, but sometimes I pop chip, ride the wrong number, and do anything I can to generally mess up a distance. The amount I miss has changed, but I will always be a rider who just doesn’t have the best eye. The horses have changed, the trainers have changed… but me spectacularly flailing over fences? That stays the same.

I’ll keep working on fixing it, but until that happens, I will miss often, randomly, and without shame.

[lesson_junkie]

Oh, OP-do note my username. Tomorrow, when I go to my lesson, my excellent instructor, whom I have been with since 1997, will say to me:

1. Close your fingers (she will say this many times)
2. Don’t cock your wrist
3. Don’t turn too early
4. Stay straight
5. Slow your upper body down

You get the picture. It happens to everyone. The key is for it to stay fun.
Do you have a chance to get out of the arena? Maybe a traill ride or a cross country school would be a good change of pace, or a bareback stroll and then share a bag of carrots. Good luck, don’t get too down on yourself, you’re not alone.

[Dewey]

Hi, BB–miss you in the ReRiders thread.

I have been riding for close to 30 years. I am skilled and confident in the saddle, but I still have chronic problems that I may never get the better of. I lean, and my right leg flops–those are just the main ones.

I’ve accepted that I’m never going to win an eq over fences class unless everyone else falls off. But I still work on my issues, train my horse, and learn new things. If you enjoy riding, keep at it. And let us know how riding the pony goes. I’m even smaller than you, and I find that I am much, much more effective on animals under 16 hands.

[AKB]

Maybe eventing and/or trail riding would be your true calling. Eventers don’t care if they miss the distance! Particularly at the lower levels. Your Clyde cross can probably miss the distance and clear a 2’7" fence without stress.

[Riverotter]

Do you enjoy riding?
Are you so horrible you are causing a horse pain?

If the answers are Yes and No, then it’s time to say “to hell with this” and just ride for fun for a while. Make your only riding goals; 1) To try new things and 2) Spend as many hours on a horse’s back as possible.
^Notice I don’t say “in the saddle”?
That’s because you should ride bareback some too, especially if you have a draftie. They are lovely bareback and it’s great to develop seat.

Ride different saddles, ride different horses - just ride for fun for a while and give yourself a break! Go back to lessons after logging 100 hours horseback in the shortest stretch of time possible. You’ll feel better, trust me.

[Countrywood]

Why are you riding such large horses esp broad barrel horses at your size? Riding is all about balance and a smaller rider on such a large and big moving horse is going to present challenges bio mechanically. Try riding size appropriate horses, 16 h and below normal barrel width.

You likely are a much better rider than you think, just started late and had some bad coaching. You are very brave to come back esp after an injury fall. If you don’t own a horse, perhaps half lease a horse so you can also have fun part of hanging out with horse, grooming, hand grazing etc (for me that is often the best part)

I’ve owned several horses and ridden since a kid and I still suck at riding! Seriously I do. I am very good on the ground and have trained horses who knew nothing to be great on the ground with manners but when I ride those same horses consistent problems. I am also small , five two and being small is not the best for a rider, so the right horse, saddle etc is a bit more important for a smaller adult rider (kids and small teens are flexible and can ride anything)

Also look into different disciplines…many adult riders pursue dressage because of the artistry and partner ship ( and it is not jumping lol)

Good luck, as long as you find riding rewarding and it gives you back something, stick with it !-

[red_mares]

@Countrywood;7865452

Why are you riding such large horses esp broad barrel horses at your size? Riding is all about balance and a smaller rider on such a large and big moving horse is going to present challenges bio mechanically. Try riding size appropriate horses, 16 h and below normal barrel width.

At 5’3", you’d easily fit 15.2 or less. A horse that size would have all the buttons in the right place for you.

[js]

I agree that you need to downsize your horse size. Big horses with big strides and body size are hard to sit for many riders (regardless of the riders size!); equally hard to have an effective leg on a really tall/big horse. I think you’ll find a big improvement on your ability as a rider on something under 16 h. Forget what is popular in the ring and ride something that is more suitable to you.

[Hulk]

I think you are being way hard on yourself. You are probably much better than you give yourself credit for. I have ridden drafts, TBs, QHs, etc , but I have to admit I will always have a thing for ponies. One of the best rides I sat on was a Connemara pony. So you never know the pony might be the ticket.

Now I have to go have a talk with myself about how I don’t need to go buy a pony.

[Pocket_Pony]

@Bigbutt;7865266

And part of me says I should just give up on riding and maybe looking at breeding agility goldfish.

This should be someone’s sig line - awesome! :lol:

[Pocket_Pony]

I’m 5’4" and when I started as a re-rider I rode big horses and have slowly worked my way down. Started with a 17.0 TB, then a 16.2 TB, then a 15.3 QHx, then a 15.1 TB, then a 15.1 mustang, and now a 14.2 pony. In the middle there, I rode my husband’s 16.1 TB and a leased 17.2 TB (ugh, hated the size on that one!). I love the smaller horses. We fit each other well, and that’s a big part of how you’re able to ride. You and your horse must be suitable for each other in order for you to be effective (unless you’re Margie Engle who is an itty-bitty thing on big horses!). Try a smaller horse and see how you like it - they are a lot of fun!

[raff]

Don’t give up! Sometimes it seems to take forever, then something makes you actually DO it…
Case in point, i’m rehabbing a big spooky hot warmblood after a nasty (and we thought career ending) neck injury.
He seems fine now, but obviously I can’t manhandle him very much. There was a tractor zooming around with its bucket in the air and other "oh s**t things happening, and lo and behold, my stinky left leg and collapsed hip HAD TO WORK, they had to or I was toast. I simply cannot over use my hands on this horse now, and there was my right leg back where it ought to be, and there was everything else I struggle with daily in the right place. The horse stayed bent around my leg and on the job too. I’ve ridden GP with this problem, but this is what it took to really make me correct it. Everyone rides with biomechanical biases, horses have them too, we don’t give up…we fix it

[Riverotter]

[QUOTE=Hulk;7865474]

Now I have to go have a talk with myself about how I don’t need to go buy a pony.[/QUOTE]

You should TOTALLY go buy a pony. And I’m not just saying that because I breed Connemara cross sport ponies - see, I breed them because Teh Awesome of sportponies sucked me in and took over my life.

Come. Join us. Be one with the ponies…

[arapaloosa_lady]

You’re way too hard on yourself

You’re imperfect. We’re all imperfect. We’re human. We could come up with a list of mistakes & imperfections for every single person here in every single area of their life.

It’s just that in riding lessons, we’re paying someone to point out everything that’s wrong! I wouldn’t take that as a cue to give up, just to take a deep breath & enjoy life in its moments.

[RolyPolyPony]

I 20th trying a pony - I’m 5’11" and prefer ponies!!

[flexion]

Improving in this sport is usually about correcting flaws rather than learning new things. It’s perfectly normal to not be able to stay optimistic and motivated when you’re always being critiqued!

The nice thing about riding is that, even though you can struggle with the same weaknesses for your whole life, you can also achieve massive success by changing something that isn’t your own riding. Yes, it is possible to suddenly have perfect equitation overnight by just riding in a different saddle or with gimmicky stirrup irons. Or suddenly be able to sit the canter on a different horse. Or suddenly understand the aids for a shoulder-in when a different trainer explains it. Or start going to the gym and suddenly have that new core strength translate to a beautiful position over fences.

Surround yourself with horses and people who make you excited to ride and learn. Set yourself up for success with your equipment and physical fitness. 99.9% of us aren’t going to become upper level riders, and for us, it’s about the journey, not the endgame.

[Hulk]

[QUOTE=Riverotter;7865767]
You should TOTALLY go buy a pony. And I’m not just saying that because I breed Connemara cross sport ponies - see, I breed them because Teh Awesome of sportponies sucked me in and took over my life.

Come. Join us. Be one with the ponies…[/QUOTE]

Great thanks a lot. I don’t have very good control as it is, then people like you just push me right over the edge. Seriously I have been shopping ponies when no one else is looking. I totally love them.

That’s why I think the OP might like one. They are so fun. And riding should be fun.