Willem: What we REALLY want for Christmas

[Willem]

Hallo every boddie, Willem here! You proberbly haff seen mein picture on die internet, I be verrie famouse. If you haff liffed on Mars or some thing, und you don’t nott to know me, I be Coreene her horse. I be VERRIE HANDSOME und I be ein chestnut Hanoverian und I be 19 und I be verrie tall, I be 17.2HH und I write prettie good English.

Any how, mannie off your horse friends und me, we haff emailed each other und this it be wot we want und don’t nott to want for der Christmas:

1. Giff us mannie karroten. This is be carrots auf Deutsch. It don’t nott to matter wot you think, we can eat mannie karroten at die same time. Like ten pounds at least. At once. Don’t nott to skimp, this it don’t nott to be in der Christmas spirit.

2. Giff us ein promise off one apfel per day for die whole year. I like to eat mein apfels in two bites, but mein mannie girl mare friends, they like it best wenn you cut them upp in mannie little pieces.

3. Stand under our mouth so der clothing can catch die apfel spit.

4. Giff us ein box off C&H Pure Cane Sugar cubes. We need TEN cubes per day. If you be saying “ten only” at die end, then we don’t nott to haff to bother counting und we know you don’t nott to be giffing us no more this day. Wenn the box it be empty, buy more. Don’t nott to let any no-sugar days happen.

5. Get ein massage with ein horse chiropractor. I like this mit die girl chiropractors die best becose I don’t nott to like mannie men except for mein grandpa, he be Coreene her daddy.

6. Giff us die same loff wot we giff you. We loff you verrie much und it don’t nott to be nice if you don’t loff us die same. Don’t nott to make us do things wot make our feets hurt.

[I]Don’t nott to buy no ugly ass things for us to wear und then say it be a present for us, it don’t nott to be, it be for you.[/I]

Verrie Happie Christmas und Happie Chanukah und Happie Kwanzaa und Happie Every Thing Else und Happie New Year.

Loff, Willem

PS: to mein pen pal Jade, wenn you coming to HB a-gain?

I be a German horse und this be straight from mein mouth.

[hitchinmygetalong]

Thank you, Willem. Or should I say “danke schon”!

[dublin]

If you haff been a verrie verrie good boy this year, you might even get a visit from us and your doggie pal Lucy in a week or so!

I think your holiday gift suggestions were wonderful. I’m sure all the other COTH bb horses will be most appreciative of your efforts and will pass your list on to the appropriate people so that they get lots of great gifts as well!!

“Of course, that’s just my opinion. I could be wrong.” - Dennis Miller

[brilyntrip]

don lyke those baths too!!keep tryin to cover up my white spots to match the brown uns

[This message was edited by brilyntrip on Dec. 13, 2001 at 09:31 PM.]

[Willem]

Becose Lucien he be mein cousine but you don’t nott to be related to me, it means you can be one off mein girlfriends!

I be a German horse und this be straight from mein mouth.

[Willem]

But this, it be die most importante thing, you haff to giff mannie karroten!

I be a German horse und this be straight from mein mouth.

[Willem]

I have been thinking for die last hour und I think that der best color fur Nena it be hunter green or it be black. My things, they all be black becose I be ein handsome Man Horse. But mannie off die filly mare girl horses, they like colors und zo I haff now be telling you that fur Nena to get die hunter green.

Tell her she can speak to me in Dutch too becose mein modder she be Hollandish und she haff teached me mannie words in Dutch, some of them the be verrie dirty.

Mein Jade I loff her verrie much und she be one off mein best girlfriends. Becose I be der Uber Stud Muffin, I haff mannie girlfriends all over die world. So all new filly mare girl horses wot don’t nott to be in mein book yet, they can send me pictures und if I don’t nott to think you be ein ugly ass horse, I will loff you.

My modder die princess, you know she be Coreene, she haff telled me one or two times that mein taste in filly mare girls it don’t nott to be verrie discriminating. Sometimes I have beed knowned to try und kill white Arabian mares, but that it be ein verrie long time a-go und I don’t nott to do this no more.

Mein girlfriend Lucy, she be mein doge friend wot be a black Labrador. We haff beed pen pals until now but I be seeing her verrie soon!

I be a German horse und this be straight from mein mouth.

[DMK]

I have engaged in de coup of thees new Mom’s Computer. She be callin’ me her cajun boy, and she be telling every’un how much she be likin’ thees Cajun Boy, but I gots to tell ya’ll that she be not treatin’ me lahk the fine cajun boy that I be!

So I have decided to lay out the list of demands…

Carrot Gumbo every day. Every cajun knows this is lahk momma’s milk. We be wastin’ away without it!

Cafe Du Monde? Yes. Most ‘specially that big sugar swizzle stick. Ya’ll can be drinking that fine brew, just give me the swizzle stick every morning and I think Ah’ll be jes’ fine.

Cajun music and fast feet. Don’ thees crazy woman understand we cajun boys just have to move our feet to the music? I do swear, if I hear her ask me to slow down mah feet jes one more time, I’m going to have to start stomping in Zydeco time. Even the Neville Brothers don’ move as slow as SHE thinks I should go.

Swamps and Cajuns. And another thing… Don’ thees woman know we cajuns was born in the mud? You hear her screamin’ every time Ah come in lahk a chestnut horse, and you be thinking she has a problem with thees. I jus’ don’ get it!

But all in all she ees not such a bad Mom. Her cookin’ skills are right sorry, but she understands Cajun Portions.

(sheesh… buy a Louisiana bred TB and never hear the end of it!)

[Willem]

Mannie of mein friends, they haff Breyer horses wot be off themselves. I would like this as well, und so would die rest off us, so please call Breyer und send photos of us.

I be a German horse und this be straight from mein mouth.

[Miniwelsh]

<BLOCKQUOTE class=“ip-ubbcode-quote”><font size="-1">quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by Willem:

Don’t nott to buy no ugly ass things for us to wear und then say it be a present for us, it don’t nott to be, it be for you.

<HR></BLOCKQUOTE>

My favorite part!! Too funny. Thanks for sharing your Christmas Wish list with us Willem, I’m sure my Minnie and Goldie will thank you when they get their tasteful clothing this year

Behind every good woman lies a trail of men

[pt1]

[system]

Yo, Bill. This is your x-the-barn-aisle neighbor, Wish. Nice list. We can both benefit from the cut-up apple advice. You rock. Sorry, my German is verklempt, I’m too much of a QH/TB appendix to get the inflexion right. Keep up the good work, tho. You’ve got Corinne going in the right direction.

[Portia]

(This is the real Portia again)

Ahhh, Willem – another handnome admirer to add to my long list.

My mom keeps a file that has all sorts of pictures of handsome studs in it, for the day when I retire and maybe want to have babies. She shows me their photos and asks me if I like them, then tells me about their breeding and accomplishments so I will know if they are suitable for a special girl like me.

That won’t be for a long time yet, though since I’m only six and just starting my career. I’m not about to give up my career to have babies! Plus, I hate to think what they will do to my figure. And I don’t think I could jump nearly as high with a big thing growing in my tummy, so none of that for me, yet. Though they are cute things, sometimes, when I’m in the mood.

Just for you, so you can see how beautiful I am, here’s a recent photo of me. I’m not usually so mean looking, really I’m not, but this was in a jump off and Jo was finally letting me go fast and I just wanted to save some time by taking a stride out and she wouldn’t let me.

By the way, I don’t have a Breyer horse made to look like me, but I do have a big stuffed doll that does, which is good.

Your new girlfriend,

Portia

[ponymom138]

Willem>
Nena is getting her Christmas massage and chiropractic on Mon. Glad to know it is a wanted gift! I will certainly take all your other suggestions under advisement, you see I am a very bad mommy and spoiled her with sooooooo many treats that she has an attitude problem now and her other mommy (my daughter) is mad at me! We hope to resume treats soon, when she realizes everytime someone looks at her does not mean its treat time. She will be getting some lovely clothes for the holidays (despite getting a complete wardrobe when she came to live with us in Sept.) Any suggestions on what color saddlepad will look good on a redhead? The ones from our black TB look awful on her so its time to take away the hand me downs and get her some of her own.She is dutch but sounds a lot like you .Though she is still only a baby (5) maybe you would like her phone number. She is quite smashing and if you like athletic girls she’s for you! Well, thanks for the help and have a wonderful holiday.

[Bambi]

Vell vell, mon cherie Jade, I vould like to meet you veery much!

Je suis un grand cheval blanc avec les caracteristiques noble I am also nice un tall - 16.3 and a bon cavalier - no obstacle is too high! Please drop by anytime… perhaps we can distract Willem with the Lovely Alice…

Bonjour Willem! That is quite zee list that you have made! I agree with most of your points Perhaps I weel have my rider take a look at it

Au revoir,

Bambi

[Red_Storm]

First of all, I want to say that I have no Polish accent any more, because I came to this country at a very young age, and have had many, many years to pick up the English. However, I do, indeed, think that all of these accents are charming!

I am very, very impressed by your Christmas list. You have done a very good job, for a German horse. (So sorry, but we Polish have a little problem with some Germans, none the less, Willem is obviously a very wonderful fellow)

However, you have forgotten one very important item on your list

PEPPERMINTS!!!

No horsey diet is complete without them. Just have you nice Mom, Coreene, give you some, and I swear that you will never go back to plain old sugar lumps again.

So, young Willem, take care of yourself, and your Mom, and have a wonderful holiday season, complete with peppermints.

[Willem]

I bist verrie in loff mit you now! Mebbe you can move to California, where die weather it be nicer.

Loff,

Willem

I be a German horse und this be straight from mein mouth.

[Chef_Jade]

[I]Dear, dear, Willem;

Why you know how much I adore men with accents! Especially older men as handsome as you! I bet you would make quite the stud!

I promise to pay you a special Christmas visit if you hang some misteltoe from your stall door. How I would just LOVE to steal a kiss from you!

Plus, I want you to promise to share all of your Christmas goodies with me. My mom, she hardly feeds me enough. I don’t know why she insists on cursing when trying to get the girth on - I mean I am a svelt 52" on a 15.3 hand frame - I think those are the same measurements as Barbie’s horse! Sheesh! I have never been into the supermodel TB waif look anyway.

And now that you know my size, feel free to lavish me with gifts. I have been eyeing a particular burgandy dress sheet that would go wonderful with my firey red hair and fair complextion. My mom is too cheap to buy it for me. Instead she insisted on buying me a little brother - and I didn’t even ask for one!

I told my mom of my plans to come visit you. She called you my sugar daddy. But I told her that was the whole reason I was going to visit you - for your sugar cubes your mom promised you.

Until later my dear Willem.

Carrots and Apples,

Jade

[/I]

[This message was edited by Chef on Dec. 13, 2001 at 05:41 PM.]

[Willem]

Bambi, I haff always wanted to knowed how blanco pferden keep clean. Wenn you go to a show, you don’t nott to be rolling in no horse poop then do you?

Jade she be MEIN girlfriend but you mebbe can also be her boyfriend becose she be too prettie to haff only one.

I be a German horse und this be straight from mein mouth.

[Everythingbutwings]

I hope that you will have a long talk with my Maddie (Proof Set) as she seems to be developing quite an affinity for sneaking time on our laptop and posting her lists of complaints.

She is annoyed with me at the moment as I failed to purchase baby carrots and gave her over large cooking carrots as a substitute.

All in the Christmas spirit, she is getting a lovely surprise but has been stamping her precious hooves and demanding that the presents appear early.