So, way back in the day two weeks ago, when all I knew about Lauren Kanarek was what I saw in court, I had serious issues with her testimony. All of the social media posts speak for themselves. Hidden recordings and her obvious lies about where she put the recorders also speak for themselves. The fact that she thought her behavior was ok is disturbing. But her attitude - so arrogant when saying she wanted to destroy him, so meek when prosecutor dude is questioning, and when all else including fake tears fails, fall back on “I was on a lot of painkillers.” Or, I don’t know, he tried to murder me. Or variations of both.
I don’t expect a victim of a shooting to have perfect recall. They shouldn’t. But I do expect their testimony in court to reflect a statement they gave two weeks prior to court.
When I reference the 09/05/19 statement, LK agreed that’s what she said except for one instance she said she didn’t remember.
The more important part of her testimony is there are some glaring discrepancies between her version of events and Rob’s and ED’s.
So I wrote all this out in case anyone else is interested.
I did take note of one social media post that was brought in, because I’m not sure if it’s coincidence, a screw-up, a window into her plan karma, or what, but it kind of gives me the creeps.
“I only need 3 bullets, my aim is nearly perfect.” LK on Facebook July 2019.
09/5/19 statement:
- [ ] When asked what she remembered, “it’s a bit shady in my mind”.
- [ ] Heard 5 shots.
- [ ] After shooting I disappeared.
- [ ] No mention of dog biting in 09/05 statement
- [ ] Michael was driving like a crazy person
- [ ] Walked down to him like I’m “miss bad ass” because “I’m sick of everything”
- [ ] She spoke first, loudly, said “how do we fix this, how do we settle Rob…right then he pulled his gun out of the pocket, boom boom, raised hand to Rob on porch and shot at him.
- [ ] Mike runs up stairs, Rob is gone.
- [ ] Took 2 in chest, blood everywhere, I ran, everything is “shady”, I disappeared. I think I went inside to get Robert.
- [ ] Ran inside to yell to Rob because I didn’t want him to come outside. Yelled, Don’t come outside!
- [ ] Rob was “not putting 2+2 together that I’d been shot.”
- [ ] Rob put Mike in a chokehold
- [ ] “Used my 7 minutes to help Rob by breaking my iPhone on his head and his ear.”was “bashing, bashing, bashing his head.
- [ ] Michael was unconscious.
- [ ] I was medvac’d in a helicopter
- [ ] Told prosecutor she never saw a weapon.
- [ ] Told prosecutor she definitely heard 5 shots.
- [ ] She reviewed the video of her interview two weeks before trial.
Direct Exam in Court
- [ ] Laying on loveseat, heard pebbles on road, saw Michael’s silver duelly, watched him park,
- [ ] Ran upstairs to let Rob know. Rob is laying on bed talking to ED on phone. Rob continues to talk to ED as they walk downstairs and outside.
- [ ] Michael was behind the bush, next to the chair. She could see him from the waist up, could see one arm. Rob is on porch with me, still on phone with ED. Eventually he hands it to me.
- [ ] Rob and Mike talked. Heard Mike say “How do we fix this, I don’t want a war.” Rob said to let the lawyers figure it out.
- [ ] Michael seemed calm. Not yelling.
- [ ] She went down to talk to him, Rob stayed on porch.
- [ ] Walked over to him and said, how do you plan to make things better, started to ask about Rob’s bill
when he pulled out a gun and shot me twice in the chest. Still on the phone with ED. Saw gun pulled out, Boom Boom, raises arm to shoot at Rob, Rob disappears.
- [ ] Immediately shot at Rob after her. Mike runs up stairs of porch.
- [ ] I spun around in a circle, then we Rob restraining Mike. Still on phone with lawyer. Told him.
- [ ] Vaguely remembers talking to 911 on phone under red umbrella.
- [ ] Walked or crawled to Rob and Mike. Tried to call 911 from her iPhone but couldn’t get it open because her hands were covered in blood.
- [ ] Called 911 from Rob’s phone. Started beating Mike on the head with iPhone.
- [ ] She was standing 3-4 ft from Michael when she shot him
- [ ] Police were there almost immediately. First cop separated Mike and Rob and did something with the gun.
CROSS EXAM
- [ ] “Disappeared” means disappeared mentally.
- [ ] (States more than once she wanted to destroy him).
- [ ] Ran around in one small circle after being shot.
- [ ] Says Rosie was “nipping” at both Rob and Mike. Doesn’t know if she broke skin.
- [ ] In reference to the morning of shooting. Q: “did you want that bastard finished?” A: Yes.
- [ ] Admits to the whole backing him up to the truck incident that happened last week of July
- [ ] Says he was driving like he always does. When asked about her 09/5 statement she says he always drives crazy.
- [ ] Didn’t see him park. Ran upstairs to get Rob because she didn’t feel comfortable or safe. Rob was on phone with attorney.
- [ ] She and Rob were on porch. Michael says, how do we fix thinks, Rob says let the lawyers figure it out
- [ ] Says Mike was calm, sorrowful.
- [ ] Mr B asks if she remembers testifying yesterday under direct about something I didn’t write down and Lauren says NO. And No, she does remember how she testified.
- [ ] She takes her shoes off and demonstrates Mike shooting her, shooting at Rob and her little circle.
- [ ] Says she disappeared “in my head.” Then she says she thinks she ran inside. THEN she says she doesn’t know what she said in September 2019 because she was on a lot of painkillers.
- [ ] Then says she didn’t run into house.
- [ ] Doesn’t remember saying she ran into house, even after looking at transcript.
- [ ] Rob jumps on Mike, puts him in a headlock and puts his arm behind his back.
Ok, here’s where things get weird with the phones.
- [ ] Still had Rob’s phone in her hand after being shot.
- [ ] Started beating Mike with HER phone.
- [ ] Just kept holding on to Rob’s phone, picked up her phone by the door.
- [ ] At this point, Mr B has her draw her location on a pic that shows she’s standing between metal table and chair.
- [ ] From there, she goes back upstairs to get her phone.
- [ ] Drops Rob’s phone somewhere in porch area.
- [ ] Can’t call 911 from her phone cuz of the bloody hands. Puts her phone down by laundry room, goes back and gets Rob’s phone, calls 911. (P.s. she’s crawling for all of this)
- [ ] Called 911. Then Rob took his phone from her.
- [ ] Now she has her phone again (NO IDEA HOW) and starts beating Michael with her phone for a few seconds.
- [ ] Rob tried to move her but she came back to hit him some more. Rosie was “nipping” both Rob and Mike while she was beating him.
Redirect, Mr Shellhorn tried to use pics to demonstrate where she was when, and even with the pics, and watching it several times, I have no clue what she was trying to say.
She did not see the phone on the table. Parties stipulate that it was Michael’s.