Horse shopping/ownership anxiety

[fivestrideline]

Warning! Debbie downer ramble ahead

Half looking for commiseration and half looking for advice here. I’m finally in a place where, should everything go to plan, I may be looking to lease or buy another “more suitable” horse. I currently own one gelding (the one on suspensory rehab) and he’s not going anywhere, but my long term goals fall outside his capabilities. I want to jump and show again.

This horse has taught me so much about hoof care, nutrition, training, general husbandry, etc. His issues seem to have also made me highly anxious and over critical. Almost every sale horse I see on video looks lame or painful to me. Stories of EDM and mystery issues have me hesitating on looking at young imports, my OTTB has me wanting something that never touched a track or training barn. I could save up for older and going, but I also don’t want to have to undo damage from previous bad shoeing/training/etc. I’m over-analyzing every. single. step. of the horses I do ride, feeling for something wrong. Farriers and vets are few, and good ones that won’t cause long term issues even fewer (and currently pretty far from me). I’ve been lied to by boarding barns about the turnout or hay situation, had my horse simply not fed or given water, not been notified about rather shocking injuries, all at seemingly nice facilities. I’ve also found a couple nice places in the mix, but they’re rare and FULL! This makes me worried about finding a place to keep my current horse after rehab, let alone a second! Add in the current ridiculous prices of horses ($12k for a track sore, fussy in the bridle horse with no right lead canter??), and lease fees often 50% or more of purchase, I feel as if I might just need to quit.

The barn is my social circle, my decompressing time, my hobby and lifestyle. But it’s been nothing except stressful recently - one good day and five bad ones on repeat. My SO doesn’t love the idea of owning horse property or DIY board because of the cost/struggle to be able to go out of town.

Am I just seeing the worst of the situation? Am I just not looking in the right places? Am I making poor choices? Do I need to rehome my current guy and take up mountain biking? I just don’t know anymore.

[Scribbler]

The more handson you are in horse care and training, the more you can be assured of the feeding regimen and of catching injuries early. The more you delegate to barn owners and trainers, the higher the possibilities of care slipping or a horse being worked through early signs of chronic stress injury.

[blue_heron]

I really really feel you. You are not alone in this. I hope I’m not hijacking your post trying to relate, but…

Mine is more financial, I think, though I am scared that whatever I end up buying will be lame because of some freak accident the rest of its life. But that’s horses, I guess.

I am finally FINALLY at a place where I can think about having my own horse, that I can do stuff with and show and not answer to owners and not feel like I’m in trouble every time a horse comes in with a scrape. I want a nice horse, after years of riding the crazies and the quirky ones (I’d be okay with quirky, if safe, for my personal horse), but of course I have champagne taste on a beer budget… and if I hadn’t spent so much money on horses I didn’t own while I was “saving up” for a horse of my own, I’d have a whole lot bigger budget.

I have a lot of undue financial stress, and even a “cheap” horse just feels like so much money to part with at once. Even though I’m not trying to buy a house right now. Even though I don’t need a new car. Even though I’m employed. Even though I have that padding that would allow me to pay for the horse and 6 months to a year of my rent and horse’s board before I was totally broke. And then there’s the budget creep after I realized that I don’t actually want a cheap horse to retrain it and I don’t want to drive to the barn worried about the Fight/Fright of the Day and I don’t want to look back on my purchase a year later and wish I’d just coughed up the rest of the money for something I could really have fun with. I’m also scared to have the unsellable horse, either because it has a dangerous streak or needs a certain kind of ride, because what if I need to flash sell it in some unforeseen situation? I don’t need to be the rags to riches story. I just want to have fun with my horse like I did when I was younger-- a teenager, I guess. For me, the fun part is in the training and the learning and the horsemanship, and that doesn’t mesh with every horse or every barn community. But I really love having a barn community. I’m busy as a young-er professional but want to do 98% of the training on my own.

I know this is the woe of every horse shopper ever, but every horse is lame, ridden badly, poorly put together, way overpriced, etc.

I’ve actually considered seeing a counsellor so that somebody will tell me it’s okay to buy the horse, but admitting how much a horse costs to anyone who doesn’t have a horse always feels a little like vomiting. And I’m scared they’re going to tell me not to buy the horse, and then what?

[fivestrideline]

Not hijacking at all! I 100% feel the stress about the financial side too. All the money I’ve spent on my perpetual rehab case could’ve bought a VERY nice horse at this point. But I happen to like him anyways . That’s what adds to my issues with buying another - I can’t afford the black hole of chasing mystery issues and constant problems with care like I have with the current horse. Financially inadvisable and emotionally not doable.

[candyappy]

It seems that so many horses have problems these days. Makes no difference if they are young or old, started or unbacked and It would make me nervous if I was looking too.

Everything about keeping a horse is just so costly now. Vet care is expensive and board is outrageous and you don’t even know if the barn will feed enough hay or be honest in the care your horse is supposed to receive.

I know there are plenty of nice healthy horses out there and many good boarding barns with knowledgable workers. I hope you find both. I think having a horse is worth the risk.

[lenapesadie]

Horses are very risky. Especially if you have concrete riding goals that involve a modicum of athletic prowess.

The horses themselves are costly as is keeping them. Good board is expensive and increasingly hard to come by. Board is always a compromise. Certainly buying a horse property doesn’t save money; better return though usually.

Any horse can die or become crippled at any moment. Or they can rack up vet bills exceeding purchase and maintenance costs. Possibly all three. Vet bills, crippled then dead.

There just isn’t anyway around the risk or the cost.

I sound like the worst negative Nancy, but I think it’s true. Horses are very expensive and very risky.

I’m still chasing the dream though. Can’t quit, won’t quit.

[Obsidian_Fire]

I completely sympathize. I feel exactly as you do. I have ONE horse. That’s it, ain’t gonna be a second one. She’s not sound but not lame either. For the money I’ve spent chasing diagnostics, tack changes, etc., I could’ve bought that $20k+ already trained something. Between what I read on here and what I see every day I have no words…. Maybe I should find another situation for my mare but what and where and how and WHO? Right now my motto is “better the devil you know than the devil you don’t”. Luckily she’s got a stellar personality. I’m not having any fun in spite of the learning. And this is way too expensive to not find joy in it.

[Jackie_Cochran]

You have my sympathy.

Due to my life circumstances (I have MS) when I put my last horse down I sat down and thought. Even though I have my own land to keep horses on there was no way that I could justify the expense of even keeping a sound horse. I got sick and tired of holding the lead rope when the vet put the horse down when that was the only answer. The incessant work of keeping a horse really got to dragging me down.

I decided I would try riding school horses. I was fortunate and the first barn I called was willing to help me (getting the horse from the pasture, grooming and tacking up) and over a decade later I still get excited about getting a ride in, and I am more excited about riding and working with the school horses than I was with my horses since I am not exhausted from just feeding and taking care of them.

I don’t get to ride the really good horses, they work hard enough training the girls for showing. I get the ones who fell through the cracks until they were fortunate to end up at the barn where I now ride. ALL the school horses have enormous gaps in their basic training so I still get to train horses. ALL these horses have some type of physical or mental problem, though usually not bad enough to make them unrideable.

I get to ride. I still get to train the horses. And the nights before my lessons I have trouble sleeping because I get SO EXCITED that I will have my lesson the next day.

I am having a LOT more fun riding these lesson horses, imperfect as they may be, than I ever had riding my own horses, plus I do not have to worry about shoeing and vet care. The constant ever increasing costs sort of sucked a lot of the joy out of riding and owning my own horses.

Some days I even feel like I am a young girl again instead of 71 years old.

It is not the same as owning, the relationship with the horse is different and it takes a bit longer to come to agreement with the horse. I miss the nickers that are not related to treats and I miss my horses being glad to see me, but I AM having a lot more fun with horses nowadays.

[wsmoak]

No help here either. I’m not planning to own another horse. The vet care situation tipped the balance. I’m over an hour from a vet hospital and while there are a few equine vets who make farm calls, they are no longer reliably available for emergencies. Then everything seems like it multiplied 1.5 times in price recently, while my paycheck did not.

[Impractical_Horsewoman]

I’m not in a financial position to buy a horse, but even if I was, I have a few friends about 10-15 years younger than me who had “that horse”—the heartbreaker horse that ran through their savings. Lame, ulcers, infections, random paddock injuries, and the retraining after long stall rest. All knowledgeable and compassionate horse people who deserved to have more fun than they did with their horses. The people borrowing other boarder horses or riding quirky ones while they paid for board on their own, theoretically nicer, unrideable horse.

As I’m a little bit older, I’m much more financially conservative. They feel they can get back on their financial feet and have spousal support, but I’m less certain. I never want to be in a position to have to choose between horses and a genuine necessity. On the other hand, the leases on suitable horses that used to be plentiful are much scarcer.

OP, I might take a break in looking. Wait a little until you can’t stop yourself from looking and the joy overwhelms the fear.

[fivestrideline]

For clarity, I’m not exactly actively shopping - more in the “explore options and budgets” part. I’d be looking at getting something in a year or two. I do window shop on Facebook all day long though, because I like to know what’s out there.

I’m thinking leasing might be the right call, but I’d be more interested in an in-barn lease with a trainer that knows the animal. I find it really helps when someone knows the horse’s quirks and how to manage it to keep it going happily. This is no easy feat to get into such a program these days without a horse boarded and training. Sigh.

[MsM]

I had a horse that suffered from many lamenesses and ultimately was retired for 6 years on my dime (I board). When he died I had just retired and hadn’t ridden regularly in years. I am single and need to pay all my own expenses.

So what did I do? Started riding again and then bought a horse! Horses were such a part of my enjoyment in life that I wasnt willing to give that up if at all possible. So of course the horse went lame within the year and I paid for a lot of treatment and two MRIs. Fortunately, he made a complete recovery and has been mostly a joy since.

My attitude is that I need to do what matters to me and enjoy the moments. I don’t want to miss out on life due to “what ifs” It is a measured risk and only you know if it is worth it to you.

[reefy]

I think I could have written this post myself! I’m not having a ton of fun for the last year with my horse (hoof/lameness crap) but she is a dream come true and I won’t ever give up on her. I have no idea how I’d even find another one as everything seems over priced and a potential money pit.

[quietann]

This is me. One horse, my beloved but very costly mare. I’ve spent thousands per year, for 14 years, trying to keep her sound and healthy, and finally gave up and retired her earlier this year. (I did not give up completely … tried SI injections a few months ago because she was clearly uncomfortable in her hind end, new vet practice was twice as expensive as the last one that did SI injections, and it improved exactly nothing.) She is still not inexpensive to keep as she has ongoing medical needs, so cheap retirement board is right out. She is boarded in a good place now, and I can take her for walks on the trails, which is turning out to be a nice thing to do together, because she is so much happier now that I am not riding her.

But I don’t think there will be another horse. Oh, I have dreams… of doing LDR in a few years on “my new horse” but I doubt it will happen, because of the expense, and the risk of getting yet another horse that had warning signs of limited soundness (yes, she had a PPE. Vet said she should be fine for my low-level purposes… but that did not work out.) Or one that is crazy. Or one I just don’t get along with. (I had a filly for a while… a born-broke type family Morgan… and we just didn’t like each other. So I sold her back to her breeder, and while I might have learned some things, the $20K or so I spent buying her, boarding her, getting her transported from MI to MA and back, etc. has put me off young horses forever.) And my own health problems and how out of shape I am now. I have a bad hip, and for 16 years, riding 3 to 5 times a week kept it from getting worse, but now…

I am an advanced beginner at best, so no, riding other people’s horses isn’t an option. No one will let me.

Plus everything is so expensive… I have fewer expenses than most people – no mortgage and no kids for starters – and a good job, but I always feel like I am scrambling to keep everything paid for. Good boarding starts at $1K plus in my area, add training, lessons, saddles, etc and it just doesn’t seem doable anymore.

And yes, some people would put down a horse like my mare tomorrow, so they could move on to the next horse, but I am just not that person. I still enjoy her a lot.

[Obsidian_Fire]

You have to start someplace. Window shopping, getting a sense of what/where/who/how much will give you just that much less to wade thru when you finally shop for real. I window shopped for quite awhile before actively pursuing a purchase.
Take the time to window shop trainers too. Make some appointments to meet those who seem promising. Watch some lessons or training sessions. If you really click, put out the feelers for a lease or lesson ride. You never know!

[fivestrideline]

I’m building some contacts in this area for sure. I’m riding for a trainer friend and have some options there, but it’s a different discipline than mine. It’s also an hour each way to her place. I could half lease there and am very much considering it, but that burns a good chunk of my horse money every month. So it’s a calculated move, if I chose to go that way.
It’s a general hesitancy and anxiety surrounding the whole idea of another horse that I’m struggling with lately. I feel as if I have been stopping and starting over for a decade, and the more I hear and the more I learn, the more I feel like asking for a mostly sound horse and a barn that doesn’t keep me up at night worrying is a fairytale.

[anon55755751]

Can commiserate, esp. with the fairytale feeling. Just had a step backwards with mine. Dying to ride more and spent my broke 20’s and early 30’s riding quite a lot of other people’s horses instead of owning. I would love to do that again to get some variety in while doing rehab at least.

But also have major life decisions looming and wondering how likely he is to end up more or less retired no matter what i do. I probably could afford a second horse now, but then time becomes a serious issue. And the future affordability and logistics frighten me.

[rulex]

I also sympathize and I’ve been there. The cost is outrageous, horse shopping is an expensive, emotionally draining nightmare. I bought that horse that cost me thousands in vet bills, gave me huge anxiety about boarding, and broke my heart. Then bought another one that needed about a year of rehab before we could finally start having fun. Boarding is expensive and unlikely to be everything you want, the choices are limited and it seems, dwindling. I honestly think the only way to stay involved is to buy my own place.

I definitely have considered quitting many times, have tried so many other hobbies, but have come to accept this is the thing that is right for me and makes me happy. So I try not to over think it and just give it my best.

As far as buying, it’s totally a roll of the dice. I was on a budget and shopping wasn’t easy, but I know multiple people who spent the money on nice WBs doing the job they wanted who had to retire them within less than a year. So spending more isn’t the answer either.

Before I give up completely, I will get a mini and take up driving.

[TWH_Girl]

This is so sweet Jackie! I love how excited you are. Best feeling!!

As for shopping…soon I will be there too as my senior horses issue’s continue to mount up. It’s not the same market I bought my last ride in 5 short years ago.

[atr]

Remember that you only see the problems posted here.

The millions of happy horse people with uncomplicated and healthy horses and boarding arrangements they are comfortable with aren’t the ones coming here looking for help.