Well, we all know that I am good, and that Canter, Beezer & Merry are bad, sooooooo I guess that leaves Heidi to fill the last spot 
Oh Jair, I am indeed bad, but in a fun, devil-may-care way! 
(Shall I reveal that I hold the record for most written reprimands received by a Disneyland employee? An accomplishment I’m proud of!) 
And now heading a bit X-rated,
Six 1/2 Strides
No matter how hard she tried, she just couldn’t find the spot. Even on that inviting “out of the corner” long diagonal line. So discouraged, she finds herself alone, on the kitchen floor, refrigerator door open, stuffing herself with chocolate dipped strawberries and gulping from the blender, left over strawberry margaritas.
“The older I get, the better I used to be.”
[This message was edited by Cactuskate on Jul. 02, 2001 at 11:34 AM.]
This is dreadfully tacky, but I’ve always thought the Infamous Insurance Fraud Scandels would translate into a wonderful version of the board game “Clue”. 
International Velvet - BBer Velvet’s official video!
Three Studs and a Filly
The Bay Gelding
uh, Canter… did you forget to mention the part about how DMK is an extremely gifted headstrong middleclass rider?
I fixed it, you made the cut
You BBers are just too much–cultured, refined, and most importantly literate. My feeble powers fail me. I shan’t embarrass myself by trying to add to your cleverness, but will someone please take me out of my misery and tell me what ROTFLMAO means? Could it be Rusty,Older,Tall Female Loses Machete At Office?Rentless,Obnoxious Tart Finds Lusty Men Abyssmally Obtuse? Ruthless,Outraged,Tipsy Female Leaves Mel After Offer? Help, help, help! It’s driving me nuts!
“The Road Not Taken”–a touching and poignant poem about the horse who wouldn’t load:
two roads diverged on a horse show morn/and sorry I could not travel both/and torture my owner, there I stood/and pulled back on the leadrope as hard as I could/…shoot–I’d finish this but the only word that I can think of that rhymes with morn just won’t work in this poem. I MUST get my mind out of the gutter!
Now on MTV:
The Real Horse World - X-rated goings on during the Desert Circuit, Florida, etc
On The Road Rules - different rules apply to those on the show circuit (as opposed to the Typo Circuit, of course)
Jair, Jair, Jair. Brace yourself sweetness as I concoct the appropriate revenge. Did I ever tell you I’m a (surprisingly enough!) Scorpio?
Heidi: “As soon as the orphaned Heidi befriends her crotchety grandfather in his mountain cabin, she is taken away from him and whisked off to the city. There, Heidi is placed into the care of a wealthy, but uncaring family that wishes her to be a companion to the invalid Klara. Soon, the two girls form a tender, loving friendship strong enough to melt even the iciest heart or heat up the coldest bedroom.”
Talk about “les-be-friends” really Heidi, why didn’t you say so? We’re all friends here.
Although much more lowbrow than yours, DMK…
Oldie but goodie…
“High Society” – black and white musical about WEF featuring all of the types written about in this year’s NY Times article.
And who could forget…
“Blazing Saddles” a “City Slicker” type story of a COTH BB field trip on a cattle drive.
Currently showing in theaters:
"The Fast… and the Furious": An action-driven drama set at an amateur jumper competition. A melee erupts between the cocky, triumphant rider who deftly shaves seconds off the course, and a local ne’er do well who’d be better off in the Rusty Stirrup Hunter classes. Famous line, uttered by the villain as he chips through a line, obliterating an oxer, “JUMP, damn you!”
“Dirty Prancing”–a coming of age story in which diamond-in-the-rough PK brings the idealistic but socially inept VTrider out of her shell: “Nobody puts VT in the corner!” Sea Urchin, the smug waiter, finally gets what he deserves after trying to slum around with a spotted pony after getting the virtuous Robbie into trouble at an in and out. The movie thrills viewers at the end when VT finally trusts PK enough to not chicken out and pat the ground at that single oxer…
slugger - whatever are you talking about? 
BTW, I lived through 3’6" at Lexington yesterday.
Robby Johnson - Never use my name in vain (meaning using it in the same sentence as scum of the earth Urchin.):mad:
rolling on the floor laughing my a$$ off and if PIMP is added on to it that means peeing in my pants. 
I love it!!
Do we have a Scout on the board who along with her brother Jeb can learn about horseshowing in the south in the old days? They can lose their innocence and learn valuable lessons abotu prejudice against WBs and later TBs in the hunters?
heidi is too smart for me
To Kill a Kellybird
Now Portia, I don’t want to totally rewrite your masterpiece (Golf Cart), and as much as I adore my dearest friend AHC, can we abbreviate her name to AC, so Jeb can stand in the rain outside the Garden in my hour of tragedy and yell “AAAAAAAAceeeeeeee!”?
This one came to me while listening to the Eagles last night.
“Desperate Trainer” a TV movie made from the Eagles’ classic song, the story of Kennett Square, a trainer who can’t get off the Circuit, with the haunting theme song…
Desperate Trainer, why don’t you come to your senses?
You been out settin’ fences for so long now
Oh, you’re a hard one
I know that you got your reasons
These shows that are pleasin’ you
Can hurt you somehow
Don,t you ride that German jumper boy
He’ll kick you if he’s able
You know the hunter hack is always your best bet
Now it seems to me, some fine wins
Have been laid upon your table
But you only want the ones that you can’t get
Desperate Trainer, you’re just like a jailer
Your truck and your trailer, they’re drivin’ you on
And winning, oh winning, well that’s just some clients talkin’
The winners are walking to the stable next door
Don’t your boots get cold in the winter time?
The rounds won’t flow and the hooves won’t shine
It’s hard to tell the chestnut from the bay
You’re loosin’ all the Highs and Lows
Ain’t it funny how the feeling goes away?
Desperate Trainer, why don’t you come to your senses?
Stop rushing those fences, don’t jump the gate
It may be Devon, but there’s a new horse beyond you
You better make somebody fund you, before it’s too late
