Because they’re not.
But again, facts don’t matter I guess, just pick a side and hunker down.
I’m interested in the facts of the matter, and theories in both directions because the facts are not known; Countering one theory with an opposing theory isn’t a declaration of being right, but an example of just how little we know (especially when we consider the sources), and the validity of just about any and all theories.
You clearly didn’t read the article
Nope. I’m just not one to pussy foot. Say what you mean to say or don’t say it at all.
Hold up - you can’t have it both ways.
Either you keep close track or you don’t. In one breath you’re blaming everyone but yourself for not getting your necessary scores - both for your awards/medals/patches/etc and for regionals. Then two sentences later you’re saying you keep close track of all your scores.
It’s not a show’s responsibility to make sure you get exactly what you need for whatever you are trying to get outside of that particular show. All this is doing is continuing to demonstrate a history of refusal to be responsible for any of your own actions - and I’m not talking about anything to do with the shooting.
When it comes to this aspect of your complaint, you’re not going to get too much sympathy. “oh, poor me, I’ve got so many horses at so many levels I can’t possibly keep track”. It’s basically your job. You spend all day riding. You don’t have a totally separate job for 50 hours a week, 50 weeks of the year to afford all of this. Take responsibility and control of your showing career. A trainer is your paid professional - they can advise, but in the end you are paying them. If you wanted to ride additional classes for your rider patch, you do. Your horse, your money, your decision. You’ll be a better, more educated competitor in the long run if you don’t depend so heavily on whatever trainer you are using at the time for these types of logisitcal decisions and information.
Yes, I think that demanding the victim answer to you or to the cyber sphere as to “why she did not leave” hundreds of times is cyber bullying. IMHO it suggests that by making the choice not to leave on 2 days notice, that LK is responsible for the fact that she got shot. Just MHO that a core group of people hammering her with that over and over and over is victim blaming.
She has answered the question, it’s just not the answer you want, so you keep hammering away. That’s bullying. IMHO.
Then saying that the way to stop a cyber mob for the person who is repeated hammered with that question should NOT post! Again, it’s all her fault!
I do sometimes mix up different individual posters in the core group. If you point it out to me I have and will apologize. But you and GiveEmEl always sound alike to me, so I mix you two up the most.I’m still anonymous, right? I enjoy attention to my screen name?
Right on. And as has been proved in science and in training, approaches used for men are not necessarily appropriate, and may be harmful, for women.
Nope not at all. While your intentions may be altruistic, your expression of these may have the unintended consequences of being perceived by some as creepy. You don’t have to agree with me, but is my opinion.
I think that the competitor and/or customer in the case of a rider-trainer relationship needs to be their own advocate. A GOOD trainer will support you if you say that you want to ride second level again to earn your patch or whatever. At the end of the day it is your (general) horse(s) and your money. If you want to ride 1 or 6 more second level tests, then do it. Be your own advocate. Do your research. Manage/record your scores.
I’ve not been in such a relationship with a trainer where I’ve depended on them heavily, so I admit I have little experience with that dynamic. Yes, I lesson weekly, and go to clinics, but ultimately manage my own competing. And I understand that some people live in a completely different word when it comes to their style of training and/or their relationship with their trainer. I’m not bashing anyone for this, but offering the idea to be somewhat independent so you’re not taken advantage of, fooled, or whatever. I do get that hindsight is always 20/20.
And I don’t think anyone should talk down to riders at the “lower levels”, we want the sport to grow, we want to encourage other riders. Not be a DQ that makes others shy away from entering the sandbox. I don’t care what level you (g) ride at, at least you’re out there doing it! So what if you ride at a lower level than I do? Again, at least you’re out there doing it.
I don’t think I need you telling me that I didn’t say what I meant to say. Obviously you have not read my other comments, as I pretty much say exactly what I want to! Quite frankly, I do have better things to do with my time than argue with you about my wording.
The bolded?
An awful lot of transference there. You have been sneering and mocking and insulting - all under the guise of being the noble warrior defending LK from the same even though you are “pro-LK” or not really “pro-LK” depending on the latest post you have written. I have not “gone out of my way” to “mock” you. You are all over this thread in everyone’s faces blasting away. Front and center.
The blue.
You did say that you were heroically trying to draw the ire of that cyber-mob to you. You have repeatedly patted yourself on the back for doing so all while insulting other posters and being pro-LK (or again, not pro-LK as mentioned above) - so yes, you have been doing this “simultaneously” for many pages now. You have also repeatedly declared that only you have pushed back - which is simply not the case as many posters here can attest - as they have also done so. Without the need to fling molotov cocktails in all directions and then complain about the incendiary results.
I still maintain and suggest that LK should not be posting here at all - as it does not help in any way whatsoever. But that is her decision to make…
The red.
You have suggested that all these threads were a vast cyber-mob that only you could recognize and vanquish. That is/was wrong - at least you have now admitted that much. Parse numbers all you want. I was just pointing out that contrary to some claims you made, there is a small core of posters that are problematical - and not the vast evil “mob” that you were railing against. My attitude is NOT “well, that is just what happens” - I have no “attitude” about this. No one has condoned any of the behavior in this thread. I have tried to point out that discussions can run their course with factual rebuttals and push back as needed and that wildly lashing out in all directions and condemning, sneering, flailing about, lighting fires, and making things even worse serves no purpose other than to further muddy the waters, derail the thread and draw attention to yourself. But then that may be what you want. Demanding in a mocking way that you should be reported and banned… is just a bit sad to me.
ETA: I have been up all night with a stallion who decided to bring in the New Year with a nasty case of pneumonia… any typos I have missed, bad grammar or faulty punctuation can be blamed on him.
If you have time to spend all day, on the porch, reading a book… you have time to make a spreadsheet of your horses, tests, and scores to know where you are wrt any achievements as outlined by the body that issues the prize for said achievement… then sit and read on the porch for the rest of the day.
Honestly, if I’d missed my Bronze due to one score, I certainly would be too embarrassed to admit it, and be doing my level best to get myself ready to get it done, and move on… rather than basically sue my way to that award. But then i enjoy the process of Dressage more than the ribbons, medals and other accolades.
To say it in fewer words, just because her past behavior makes it statistically more likely that bad behavior may emanate from her in a given week, does not establish as a fact that she behaved badly that particular week.
Obviously :lol:
I’ll take “Irony”, for $1000 Alex.
“Personal Responsibility” was few enough, I thought. 😂😂
I understand NJ no longer does monetary bail. I was referring to the hearing in which they determine whether he is released or not as a “bail” hearing, which is incorrect terminology. There is a hearing at which information about the recordings may have been been introduced, but it is not a properly called a bail hearing.Note “bail” in quotes. I was referring to the hearing where they decide whether or not to release prior to trial, in which NJ no longer uses monetary bail as a “bail” hearing, while understanding that no monetary bail is involved. But very poorly worded. My bad.
[quote="“Dee-Vee,post:1290,topic:464204”]
The issue is where to draw the line between what constitutes “victim blaming” vs “open discussion”.
I’m reminded of the old SNL sketch where an 18th century lord creates fodder for others’ ridicule by proclaiming, “You mock me! I will not be mocked!” But I’ll resist the temptation.
Have you ever considered that instead of swashbuckling your way into the middle of what you perceive to be an unruly mob and then puffing out your chest waiting for someone to pin a medal on it, you might actually do more to help quell the debates and questions and inflammatory posts about this tragedy by … not posting a steady stream of hypotheticals and personal theories and challenges on this thread like it’s your job?
Have you ever considered that the best way to turn a conversation away from outrage and back to level-headed discussion is not to loudly proclaim your perspective as truth and declare anyone who disagrees with you to be a villain, but rather to find some empathy or common ground with your interlocutors? Lala has done that far more effectively than you. Are your contributions really helping her?
Have you ever considered that there are a diversity of perspectives here that don’t boil down to “pro-LK” and “anti-LK”? That there are more than a couple people here who’ve experienced violent assault in their past, and empathize with the devastation that can cause and the work of putting pieces back together, who are rooting for LK to triumph over this crime regardless of whether they believe the story patched together in public discussion is complete or reliable? That there are plenty of people who are horrified by MB and his behavior and want him to face justice, but also struggle to comprehend how any human being could embody the sheer, unalloyed ineptitude it would take for a premeditated murder attempt to play out as this incident did? Most people here see this situation as complex, comprised of multiple elements in which luck, judgment, and intent might have varied in direction and magnitude, but you insist on boiling this down to two opposing fronts and a binary for blame. Have you ever considered that trying to sort everyone into good guy and bad guy categories generates unnecessary opposition, and might intensify the acrimony?
You can call yourself a hero all you want, or dream about martyrdom by post-flagging. But at the end of the day, your quest to single-handedly vanquish some perceived mean girl conspiracy is counter-productive w.r.t. the length and rancor of this thread. From the other side of the screen, you appear to be just another person at a keyboard willing to judge strangers and speculate about a tragedy for the sake of your own entertainment.
I appreciate Lauren’s willingness to answer the questions that have been asked respectfully, and I hope the new year brings her health, and resiliency for the publicity and conversations that will inevitably follow this case.
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