Sadly, elizabeth picks at the crab puffs, looking for pieces that have not been stepped on. “These were my favorite.” She then sets off to look for the Mrs. Paul’s fishcakes. “Those are my other favorite.”
Merry, wtywmn4 is right. I’m beginning to think that maybe you ARE Italian Catholic. Rowdy at wakes, drinking too much, reminiscing sloppily . . . . Are you going to pick a fight with someone, thereby confirming my suspicion?
With the thread becoming more ripe by the moment (the unexpected sun isn’t helping) don’t you think we better start our preparation for taking the thread to it’s chosen final resting place? That is, of course, when the skiing is finished
At last, a scam/plan to keep us in margaritas!! The perfect organic mud pact. And where shall this be sold? Neiman’s? Nordstrom’s? Ohhhh, I forgot, MUHHHHHHMUHHHHHHH…Chanted to the tune of “Hair”. Billboards, photo sessions, magazine ads…Merry, career not over, you’ve been resurected. Chin up, hit the gym, drop twenty firm those abs… There is life after all… 
Yeah, I like sponsoring our own Grand Prix! In fact, the water under the liverpool could be a pond of Muck Mud!
(Should the traditional water jump be stocked with koi?)
Then we could go on to sponsor our own equitation challenge class: “The Muck Medal” 
“But if we’re going to do all this,” Merry says rather excitedly, “we’d better break up into teams and hit various locations for scamming… I mean soliciting… donations.”
Now, (this one is easy) what hunter did they have and what junior rider rode him to AHSA Medal Finals reserve?
Well, then, why do they call those vehicles “all terrain vehicles,” right Merry? Exactly. And you will not be constrained by the norms of society. NO! Stay off the grass? Geesh! Stay off the sidewalk? Puh-lease!
Can I have a Koi Sandwich with tartar sauce, please?
If the disparaged thread is to die, we must keep this one near the top. I think those who post the unkind things are just jealous, a pretty easy thing at this time of year in Canada. Shiver!
The “do you remember” posts about California horses and riders of the 70s and 80s are such great fun to read, at least to someone pretty much from that era. Even with a failing memory, it’s amazing how many names I remember well. And, now that I know who Merry is in real life, I remember her too. 
Cheers, Maggi
“ehhhh,” elizabeth groans as she hoists herself into the pickup truck bed, pushing the tort along in front of her, “sh*t, I got chocolate on my face. oh well, my face is riddled with stress-caused blemishes anyway.”
Oh, so, the bar exam. . . Yeah. . . it kicked my a#&. 'Nuff said.
Day one was ugly - ugly, I say. They were trying to suck my will to survive. But I made it through, I went home, I studied in the hotel like a pathetic college freshman, and then I was back at ‘em again on Wednesday. Oh, they gave me their best stuff on Wednesday. 200 multiple choice. Yeah, 200 - six hours worth. And I’m not gonna lie - some of them were tricky. They were jumpin’ out of bushes, shooting at me. Then when I was down, they were kicking me in the ribs.
And I missed mass, too. It was freakn’ Ash Wednesday. But someone must have gone to mass on my behalf b/c today’s exam was a gift from God. It was three essay on my favorite subjects and one big essay asking me to write a closing argument. Heck, I love closing arguments. Sometimes I just give closing arguments for the fun of it. In the shower. Or in my car. Or in the middle of an all-attorney meeting at work. I digress.
“HEY - SLOW DOWN UP THERE. This tort is sliding all over . . . . Does anyone mind if I take my shirt off? I’ve been wearing it for days now. . . .”
Yeah, Bill has been doing his own thing. I told him he was smothering me. I needed space.
We must keep the wake going.
Suave you forgot Lawn Darts, a 2.2a class, in the jumper division.
Wty is so happy, at last the Hack & Snack class with Jacks, how utterly perfect!! Leaping Russells, running horses, hmmmm wasn’t that the last under saddle class we participated in?
Suavereno, It looks like we are the only ones here. So we might as well enjoy the Margaritsa by ourselves. Where did every one go?
Funeral Blues
Stop all the clocks, cut off the telephone,
Prevent the dog from barking with a juicy bone,
Silence the pianos and with muffled drum
Bring out the coffin, let the mourners come.
Let aeroplanes circle moaning overhead
Scribbling on the sky the message He Is Dead.
Put crepe bows round the white necks of public doves,
Let the traffic policemen wear black cotton gloves.
He was my North, my South, my East and West.
My working week and my Sunday rest,
My noon, my midnight, my talk, my song;
I thought that love would last forever; I was wrong.
The stars are not wanted now: put out every one;
Pack up the moon and dismantle the sun;
Pour away the ocean and sweep up the wood;
For nothing now can ever come to any good.
– W. H. Auden
don’t forget the other time honored Italian graveside tradition of blaming all the other members of the family (BB) for the death of the thread.
This is pretty pathetic, elizabeth! So between the two of us, a what, Catholic and a Presbyterian, we can come up with versions of only 3 of the 10 commandments?
All those summers in Vacation Bible School for naught! 
SuaveReno immediately rummages through her backpack and yells “Sushi for everyone” as she pulls out her Ginza portable sushi set.
“Okay everyone, how many pieces?”
Coreene comes back from Green Room, smiling again, all stupidity by her having been forgotten by her.
“GIRLS!!” she screams, ignoring the red flashing lights and the fact that the show is on RIGHT THEN. “Girls, I’ve gotten us a much higher percentage!”
Then she looks down at her blouse and is horrified to see that her buttons are, again, done up wrong.
“Zipper the next time,” she mumbles to herself.
Ciao everyone!
Until next time on another thread.
Here’s the pic of Luc!
My vote is for Merry in the Arena with a dead Koi!
To break this up a little bit (yes I do spy on you guys from the Canadian border) here’s something in honour of the weekend
The 5 Stages of Drunkenness
Stage 1 - SMART This is when you suddenly become an expert on every subject in the known universe. You know you know everything and you want to pass on your knowledge to anyone who will listen. At this stage you are
always RIGHT. And of course, the person you are talking to is very WRONG. This makes for an interesting argument when both parties are SMART.
Stage 2 - GOOD LOOKING
This is when you realize that you are the BEST LOOKING person in the entire bar and that people fancy you. You can go up to a perfect stranger knowing they fancy you and really want to talk to you. Bear in mind that you are still SMART, so you can talk to this person about any subject under the sun.
Stage 3 - RICH
This is when you suddenly become the richest person in the world. You can buy drinks for the entire bar because you have an armored truck full of money parked behind the bar. You can also make bets at this stage, because of course you’re still SMART, so naturally, you will win all your bets. It doesn’t matter how much you bet 'cos you are RICH. You will also buy drinks for everyone that you fancy, because you are now the BEST LOOKING person in the world.
Stage 4 - BULLET PROOF
You are now ready to pick fights with anyone and everyone, especially those with whom you have been betting or arguing. This is because nothing can hurt you. At this point you can also go up to the partners of the people who you fancy and challenge them to a battle of the wits or money. You have no fear of losing this battle, because you are smart, you’re RICH and Hell, you’re better looking than them anyway!
Stage 5 - INVISIBLE
This is the final stage of Drunkenness. at this point you can do anything, because NO ONE CAN SEE YOU, You dance on a table to impress the people who you fancy because the rest of the people in the room cannot see you. You are also invisible to the person who wants to fight you. You can walk through the streets singing at the top of your lungs because no one can see or hear you and because you’re still SMART you know ALL the words.
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