The Maestro has written another book

If you haven’t already done so check to see whether they’ll allow you to use your own saddle. The saddles on racewood simulators can be changed.

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Yep. Book’s here and I’ve started on it. We’re taking a trip to the Keys – so my progress through it will be hampered. Tempting to take it as “beach reading” and have the tides take it away…

It’s been a while since I read through other’s impressions of the book – I’m ASTOUNDED at his bad luck finding riding teachers/camp instructors. They’re all such big fat meanies!

I doubt his assertions that camp instructors/directors used the F-bomb. Not around kids in the 80’s.

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Has the security guard at the horse show threatened to shoot him dead yet? Actually take his gun out and shoot a child attending a horse show with his dad? Ah, memories. You’ve got so very much to look forward to. :rofl:

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Ah, you’ve already discovered one the recurring themes: The evil Keepers of Horse Knowledge have conspired against him his entire life. Poor widdle Nicky!

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Talking of humping, and dressage simulators…I was videoing my Granddaughters lesson and got distracted by this

Seems they have a simulator in there…

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Does anyone remember the inch worm thing you had to hump to make move?

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Does anyone remember something from way back regarding NP staying with a person hosting a clinic and creeping them out? Or did he WANT to stay at the host’s house and that creeped them out?

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Yes. Can’t remember who it was though.

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For those of you now reading this bizarre rant for the first time, remember you can review it on amazon.

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I think it was some comment about what he wanted to do given his wife was in a different state and he was therefore free to explore other options, or some such thing. I feel like it was the clinic where he cooked pasta, but I could be mis-remembering.

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I recall that one of his clinic requirements was a shower on site.

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Super thoughtful. After intense exposure to Crotch Paws I’m sure all the clinic participants would feel the need to hose themselves off at the end of the day. Or sooner.

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Yes! And then afterward, you’ll be taught our secret handshake, given access to the Dressage Decoder and Judge Influencer handbook, and awarded a complementary bathrobe, suitable to wear in any basement or underground shelter. :sunglasses:

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:smile::smile:

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By pasta, do you mean… 2 minute noodles?

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That would never happen, because Applebee’s would sue him for revealing corporate information and proprietary cooking techniques, all stolen from them when he was employed as a line cook. Even the Minestrone Maestro can’t face the might of Corporate America head-on.

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Okay, just the phrase “2 minute noodle” makes me laugh. Because… well… :flushed: :rofl:

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LOL! That would be wishful thinking on someone’s part. Thirty second noodles :stuck_out_tongue_closed_eyes:

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The “Minestrone Maestro of Minute Rice Risotto and the Mower Monologues.” :rofl::roll_eyes::rofl:

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I could see that as a book title,

Could add the moanings of the mediocre.

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