This isnt what someone said but what they did. Misty BLues comment made me think of it.
This was a HUS class so there were several riders in the ring. Riders SO was given expesnive video camera and asked to video the class for selling the horse later. SO videos the class and later the rider wants to see the tape. The tape well done BTW shows a chestnut TB going around the ring & wins the class.
Great job–except the riders horse was a bay Morgan. :yes:
SO still hears about that one. :lol:
At a show, I decided to put my Western Pleasure gelding in a Hunter Under Saddle class. This horse was always in low gear, and I was spurring, pushing, and kicking the entire class to keep him moving. At the end, the judge says to me, “You should just let him move out.” I had to laugh, knowing the huge effort I did to TRY to make him move out!
There have been many, many shows at which my dad, upon seeing one of our horses being ridden by either me or a pro would comment on what a nice horse that was and was it for sale?
Ummm…well, yes he is for sale Dad but YOU are the current owner :lol::lol:
He tried but never could tell the difference b/t the bay horses. To his credit he ALWAYS remembers my gray horses name.
[QUOTE=MistyBlue;3850530]
More than once at shows I’ve watched the little ones riding for fun and seen parents outside the rail wooping and clapping and then hearing the other parent lean over and whisper, “Honey, that one isn’t ours.” :lol: Once heard a Dad reply, “Well it’s hard to tell, they all dress the same and ride brown horses!” He kind of had a point from a casual spectators point of view, LOL![/QUOTE]
I always made my dad stand next to my trainer because otherwise he couldn’t tell which one was me. Even when I had a distinctively marked chestnut (big bald face with a black spot between the white and chestnut on one side) he couldn’t tell me from the crowd. Now when I show in the eq on a bay horse he’s really lost. LOL.
Sad to say, I know exactly who you are talking about, too.
So this is what a friend was told by a big time dressage trainer at a clinic where she had paid $$$$$$$… Upon first examination of the riders that were there that day, he told her: “Your horse is too skinny and you are too fat”…
Can’t believe she actually rode! I would have probably killed the man…
And I can totally relate to the “dad” thing were the dad is clueless as to which horse is yours… I have a big chestnut with a blaze… he managed to walk up to a dark bay with a star and ask how “Maya” was doing… Yikes… but I love him anyway…
Other classic moment… dentist at show barn came to do horse’s teeth (Groom held her as I was at work). Go to the farm next day, look at the dentistry papers… Maya- 13 year old Dutch WB… mind you she was a 4 year old TB… Yikes… Almost thought she didn’t get done for a minute… but where did my check go then!?!
I have to add that my favorite is the one… Can’t believe he’s lame… CANTER!!! My lord!!!
My daughter’s trainer was holding his first demonstration at an Expo about sales preparation. A few shaky sentences in, Nervous Nelly proclaims…
“You should always clean their socks, especially if they are white”
:lol:
OK, here’s one about myself (not at a show, but still funny) - When I was very young, I was reading The Album of Horses by Marguerite Henry. One of the chapter titles was “No Sugar Please, Thank You.” I thought that was a BREED! There was a pretty picture in the chapter, and when people would ask what my favorite breed horse was, I would knowingly reply, “The No Sugar Please Thank Yous.”
When I first started showing, my only experience was doing the jumpers. My first time doing eq, I was second to go and was watching the rider from the in gate. As she picked up her canter and headed for the first fence I gasped and said to my trainer: “Oh no! She didn’t wait for the buzzer!!”
Good thing I didn’t go first!
When I was younger, a bigger local series in the area was a mainstay on our schedule. There was a little boy who also attended these shows. He was about 4, and we’ll call him Tommy. Tommy was the son of a local trainer, who while relatively successful, ran a thoroughly “backwoods” operation. Tommy had a fat little Thelwell pony who we’ll call Fred. At one show, Tommy was seen riding Fred in the short stirrup carrying a large leaf in place of a bat. Fred was being rather lazy, and would get “smacked” with the leaf everytime he broke his gait. When asked why he didn’t carry a bat, Tommy replied “I don’t want to hurt him yet.” Hmmm…
At a show later in the year, Tommy had Fred in the model class. Fred was having trouble standing still. After a few minutes of uncomfortable silence and fidgeting on behalf of the pony and his boy, Tommy SCREAMS “STAND STILL, YOU F****T”. Mind you, this was a four year old child. About 5 feet from the judge.
[QUOTE=FrenchFrytheEqHorse;3851115]
When I was younger, a bigger local series in the area was a mainstay on our schedule. There was a little boy who also attended these shows. He was about 4, and we’ll call him Tommy. Tommy was the son of a local trainer, who while relatively successful, ran a thoroughly “backwoods” operation. Tommy had a fat little Thelwell pony who we’ll call Fred. At one show, Tommy was seen riding Fred in the short stirrup carrying a large leaf in place of a bat. Fred was being rather lazy, and would get “smacked” with the leaf everytime he broke his gait. When asked why he didn’t carry a bat, Tommy replied “I don’t want to hurt him yet.” Hmmm…
At a show later in the year, Tommy had Fred in the model class. Fred was having trouble standing still. After a few minutes of uncomfortable silence and fidgeting on behalf of the pony and his boy, Tommy SCREAMS “STAND STILL, YOU F****T”. Mind you, this was a four year old child. About 5 feet from the judge.[/QUOTE]
HAHA!:lol::lol::lol:
Good Lord…I would have laughed hearing the little tyke holler that too! :lol: :lol: :lol:
I went to watch a friend’s children showing in a nearby 4H show a few summers ago. I got a huge kick out of this one young male rider…he was maybe all of 10-11 years old, gangly boy on this really tough nasty bucking Haffie pony. They were doing games…and right before every entrance in the ring that pony would break out in a crow hopping fit for a good few minutes before going in. The young man would just keep his cool each time, riding it out and asking repeatedly but nicely for this bugger to behave and go forward. The last class this pony broke out into a major bucking fit, complete with spins. He stopped trying to get the pony forward, bridged his reins and grabbed the pommel with that hand and threw the other up in the air to ride it out rodeo style! I damn near peed myself laughing…as did the rest of the onlookers. He got a standing ovation before getting into the ring. :lol: :lol: :lol:
This entire thread has had me giggling from start to finish.
Not necessarily a brain-dead comment, I actually think it was kind of cute:
When I was a pre-teen and in the “beginner jumping” class at the lesson barn, our instructor announced that a group from the barn was going to the Rolex 3-Day in a couple of weeks and she thought we ought to go. One of my classmates came in the following week and told the instructor “I can’t go to the Rolex. . .I don’t think I’m ready for that yet.”
A more brain-dead comment:I own a Tennessee Walker (flat/natural shod). We’re non-competitive and prefer to stick to the trails and horse-camping, and we keep a pretty good pace out on trail. Many “experienced” horse people, when they learn what breed Badger is, have asked me if I ever get bored because my horse “can’t go any faster than a walk.” :sigh: Others say that he can’t be a “real” Walking Horse, because he doesn’t do that high-stepping stuff. Double-:sigh:
Finally, a somewhat-intelligent comment from a non-horse person at a show:I used to work for people who were (and still are) really big into AQHA Western Pleasure. They invited me to come watch them show at the Quarter Horse Congress, so I asked my mom to come along. She is not a horse person, but she went anyway.
I understand that the AQHA is making an effort to get away from the ol’ peanut-pusher, gimpy-looking pleasure horses that the WP discipline has become. However, the particular class we were watching apparently didn’t get that memo. Noses almost dragging in the dirt, and I could probably walk faster than they were loping.
After a few moments of watching the class, my mom leaned over and quietly whispered “what’s wrong with these horses?” When I explained that’s how they were “supposed” to look for the class. . .she was horrified and wanted to leave. I was so proud of her.:lol:
[QUOTE=WorthTheWait95;3850605]
There have been many, many shows at which my dad, upon seeing one of our horses being ridden by either me or a pro would comment on what a nice horse that was and was it for sale?
Ummm…well, yes he is for sale Dad but YOU are the current owner :lol::lol:
He tried but never could tell the difference b/t the bay horses. To his credit he ALWAYS remembers my gray horses name.[/QUOTE]
Ohh, that reminds me of a little trick my mom and I played.
So, I was trying out this green horse named Ed who had alot of incorrect training under his belt. He was a quick learner and had a ton of personality, but he would run around with his head in the air on the flat and to the fences. My dad HATED this horse and couldn’t understand what we liked about him.
Fast forward 2-3 weeks.
My mom and I bring home another tape of me riding another horse named Butterfly. My dad loved him and couldn’t get over his expression over the jumps and how he seemed to love his job. We got his blessing (and funding) to purchase Butterfly the next week.
A bit after that, my mom and I came clean and told him the Butterfly and Ed were the same horse. He couldn’t believe it, was slightly angry with us, but now he loves the horse, too, so it’s okay. 
I showed hunters from the time I was nine until I was 18. I always dreamed of showing jumpers, but never imagined I’d have the horse to do it. Well, fast-forward to freshman year of college. I’ve moved my horse to a higher end jumper barn near my school and it turns out she’s a much better jumper than a hunter. So come spring we load her up and go to our first jumper show. It was rated, but it wasn’t a big deal, so low pressure. My trainer patiently teaches me the course and off I go into the wild blue yonder.
My trainer, who really is a wonderful person, forgot or didn’t realize that I had no idea about anything jumpers. She didn’t explain what a power and speed class was to me, nor did she explain that when you hear a buzzer anytime after the first buzzer you’re supposed to stop. :lol: I had a stop in the power phase and, not realizing, just kept going. They buzzed me several times. When trainer had stopped laughing she hollered for me to come out and explained the different types of classes and the majesty of the buzzer. :lol: I never made that mistake again, I was so embarrassed!
Later in the year, we had another new-to-jumpers talk: apparently you have to go between the finish timers for your winning jumpoff time to count; simply crossing through the general radius of the timers is not good enough. :lol::lol: I’m not stupid, I swear, I just am a hair oblivious.
I’ve got two funny ones both from kids.
While training for a winter schooling show I had two sisters in a semi private. They were very talented girls just started jumping that summer etc.
I have the indoor set up with a basic hunter course. The youngest goes around nicely so it’s time for the oldest (they are doing the same course) She repeats the course to me and gets it all messed up. we go over it again until she gets it (seriously line diagonal…) Half way through her course she does a diagonal backwards, I asked her where she was going and she looks around and goes “oh fergalicious!” (this was when the song ad just came out.
Same show different kid
I had an adult brave enough to come to a schooling show and do the W/T/C class as she was just learning. While they are waiting for their horses (they were sharing with other riders) The 8 yr old turns to my adult and says “how old are you” The adult graciously replies “38” the 8 year old looks at her again and says “what are you going to do if you have I beat you in the class?”
Apparently my adult just busted up laughing and told the 8 year old she would live! (and yes the 8 year old won everything!)
OHHH I have a trainer one
my first horse was psycho! I was 16 and we had just started riding with this male instructor (he would come to teach in sagging breeches and tennis shoes and he was not good looking!)
The schooling horse I was on came up lame so I asked if I could go get my gelding instead. So I get my guy tacked up and bring him out and he is wired! So I am dealing with it as best I can and the trainer looks at me and says “the best thing to do with a horse that is hyped up is to just quit and put him back in his stall.” At which point he turned from me and continued teaching everyone else. I paid for a lesson got a lame horse, told to just quit and ignored! I didn’t take lessons after that!
And before anyone asks we were not distracting from the class we did our turn like everyone else, and got the same amount of attention. I was handling him fine he was just hot!
I just can’t imagine telling a student the best thing for a hot horse is to just get off and put them away!
I have a trainer story, I was going to a horseshow, and I had been told I would only be doing pleasure with this pony, well we get down to the show, and schooling was terrifying, because the indoors’ lights kept flickering off and there was horrible thunder…anyways, that night we are at the hotel, and the trainer tells me I will actually be doing low hunters. I was a little irritated since this was a common practice of this particular trainer to trick you into going to horse shows thinking you were doing one thing, and then switching on you.
The thing that ticked me off though was when I went to go into the arena for my first over fences, the trainer told me I was neither aloud to wear spurs or bring a bat because she wanted to sell the pony. After I had a stop in that class, I come out of the ring, and in front of all the other riders and trainers, she says, “I told you to bring in a bat and wear spurs!!!”
hahah.
Well…nice to see this one again…Bumpkin? Was that you;). One of my (few) thread starting successes.
My late non horsey Mother drove all the way from Orange County to Santa Barbara…maybe the Flower Show in 1972 or so to watch me show a Trail/WP horse (back then, the disciplines showed together).
Across the aisle was a multiple WP Champion (Sen Gee Bars) that had recently sold for a rumored 15k. That was alot of money then, as in alot alot.
She looks in the stall, sniffs, and comes up with “he smells just like yours”.
And, no offense, I know and earlier poster on this thread meant the grounds…but…
“He did great at WEF this summer” just hit my funny bone. “WEF” of course is “Winter Equestrian Festival”.
The latest and greatest one I heard was watching a lesson the other day at the barn where I lease a horse. The coach was supposedly helping the girl work on bending her horse (as much as you can with an unengaged horse and minimal attempts to engage it) . The exercise looked like this
Walk down the quarter line, turn horse’s neck completely sideways (think no outside aids) and then kick her in the side to get her to turn around
Trainer exclaims “GOOD!”
Walk back to trainer
Begin turn on forehand. Hindquarters move two steps. Front quarters move two steps. This continues. Trainer once again praises, albeit this time lightly, but never mentions that the front quarters are supposed to stay in place.
Rider goes large and trots around once. Goes back to walk. Proceeds to walk up to trainer across the diagnol.
Trainer: “No, no, you can’t get them to bend while they are on the diagonal!”
Huh? Now, I know you can keep them straight coming across the diagonal, but you can also bend them, and change their bend, etc. I also know the horse very well, and the horse already knows how to do everything they ask (engage, bend, turn on the forehand, etc) so it’s not a matter of slowly introducing the horse to the concept (or the rider).
I turn to my friend “Did I just hear what I thought I heard?”
My friend “Unforetunately.”
This is a few weeks after watching them school the horse over fences. The line was a three stride and the jumps were about 2’. The horse jumps in calm as can be and the rider slams on the brakes. Horse flings it’s head in the air and piles on the brakes immediately (good horse) within the last stride before the second element. Apparently they are teaching this poor soul not to rush. Eek.
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