Update pg 100-Erin sends the thread over the Rainbow Bridge. It had a good life...

[FindersKeepers]

Thank you all for realising the necessity of the flax seed cookies! I have a video of what happens to these poor things when the go stale and end up at elementary school bake sales, it’s very graphic though, I will probably have to get Erin’s permission to post the link.

To make this easier on everyone, I will just post my bank account number on the BB, and you can all wire me the money. Then if you send too much, you can just get it out yourselves. I’m going to be busy baking cookies, and don’t have time to make trips to the bank.

459809834690 98324786236 and my mother’s maiden name is Smith if they ask.

[eventable]

How did this thread ever get to 71 pages?

[claire]

findeight, Where do you live? Because I know for a FACT that in Tennessee you can have the owners of the horses you ride write YOU a check and then give the trainer a cut and pocket the rest in your off shore account!

That is just SOOO unfair of your parents not to support your horse passion…for such a selfish reason!

My amatuer friend from Tenneesse was in a similar situation and told me what SHE did was trailer the owners horse out to CA. and lease it to some people there…she was then able to buy herself the horse she deserved!!!

After all, it just is not fair that some people have so much $$$ and can’t EVEN ride…YOU on the other hand DESERVE to have a nice horse!!!

[eventable]

I’ll do it with you. I think I have a pintowalkaloosa around here somewhere, so we can match. I’ve decided to wear my national equestrian team jacket, which is purple with gold stripes. I’m pretty sure I can steal one for you though, so that’s OK.

[horse_poor]

Holly Jeanne, do you not know ANYTHING?

BEFORE going to a dressage show you MUST take him in a parade! All of the hoopla going on will help him get used to loud noises and stuff. It is even better if you taken him in a parade as soon as he has left the track-the same day, preferably.

I am afraid you have ruined your horse if you did not do this. Perhaps you should just breed the one you already have and get a new one?

ALso, if your horse has a crooked leg or hell, like the one above, missing a leg all together, did you know you can build one up or a whole new one using elmers glue, baling twine, and spray paint? A guy who shows cows told me all about this, and I am sure it is not illegal because someone told me it was not, and she was a BNT and BNT’s know everything.

You glue the baling twine to the deformed area of the leg, or if you are missing a leg, just glue a whole bunch together, and paint it. Voila, a pefect leg.

[Grasshopper]

ack, I have been terminally infected by this thread! (Should I call the vet?)

Peeked in at the “neighbor’s dogs” thread here on Off Course and had to sternly hold myself back from telling the poor beleaguered woman to “resque” the annoying dogs AND owner!

[DeLapp512]

so thats how the mare had 8 embryos…tooo many smegma coolers. i knew it!

eggbutt, its to early to be drunk on smegma. do a line of apple bute powder and get with it!

but then again, you’ve gotta build your smegma tolerance up by tomorrow night…so go for it i rekon

[Cindeye_sEvilTwin]

Help. My horse keeps throwing me off and I don’t know what to do. My trainer says I should just get a $2000 kevlar helmet and get over it. Anyone else have this problem?

[mcm7780]

Walking in on your parents will scar you for life, too.

[eventable]

DeLapp - I already entered you to go with me on our matched GypsyVanners (since I’m your BNT what I say goes). I thought you were closer to my age (almost 26).

I am still so pissed off with my boss - so much so that I was cutting bread and thinking about what I want to do to him, and ended up almost slicing off a finger. With a bread knife!!! It’s bled quite a bit but I’ve put a bandaid on - should I call the vet? Or should I call my lawyer and sue my boss for everything he has?

[SillyHorse]

<BLOCKQUOTE class=“ip-ubbcode-quote”><div class=“ip-ubbcode-quote-title”>quote:</div><div class=“ip-ubbcode-quote-content”>Originally posted by claire:
And I just had a thought…Do you think the Judge/Clinician will want to get on my horse?

Because Jamaican horses are VERRY special and only I can ride him so he won’t get hurt and get bent wrong???

Does the Judge/Clinician HAVE to get on my horse? Because that just CANNOT be…I would (unfortunately) not be able to join all my new best friends on this BB at your Show/Clinic! </div></BLOCKQUOTE>
From reading the previous posts, I think the clinician is Jesse Helms, and the judge is Judge Judy. So I wouldn’t have any qualms if either one or both wanted to ride my horse.

[buff4948]

Even Table - so when the ducks swim in the pond which way is it? I’m going to have to visit this ‘New Zealand’ and see for myself.

By the way where is ‘Old Zealand’?

[RoyalTRider]

There’s only one (two-part) solution. Do Paralli training and then take up classical dressage.

[DeLapp512]

eh, who needs real celebrities? we’ve got mc hammer and vanilla ice, plus a ton of hot tripods…so we don’t need no movaystas…

28 hours til prom. i am sooooo excited. i’d better go ahead and get my hair done today…i just won’t sleep tonight.

[Helen_of_NC]

Well I personally think a mini trained to jerk on the inside rein at just the right moment would do the trick. And while you may think trainers are evil, one perched on the rail emitting a primal scream of 3,000+ decibels, coinciding with the mini-jerk, ought to really do the trick. He’d be worth his weight in smegma for that trick alone.

[mcm7780]

OKAY THE OFFICIAL WEBSITE WITH SPAGHETTI JUNCTION PICTURES IS UP!!!

Here ya go! If that doesn’t work, just go to my Webshots Album and click on the Spaghetti Junction pictures!

[Snap]

Oh my Mcm and I are gonna blow you away with our tandem class, how many entries are there? It is a 7 ish right…which is really 9.

Finders!!! Call the vet out now, or better yet just make sure you get everyone’s opinion on this board and then ignore the vet. I say slather some flax on her BOSS and hopefully she will eat it. Sounds pregnant to me! Yeah, a baby fillygelding

(As I left the barn today our 1 year old filly was sleeping in the field and all I could think was fillet 0’ filly since I’d love to resque her!)

[mcm7780]

I am going to wear my unapproved hunt cap with no chin strap. It’s velvet, so I am hoping it will match the lapels on my date’s tux!

[macmtn]

Maybe Pocket Pony could wade (really DEEP!!) in here with a professional opinion …

[Irish_Ei_s]

Very, very Emusing…
Eileen, but I don’t sway