Horse Poor. That sounds like a fabulous plan. I think there needs to be a very unscientific and bullshit study done. But only as an after sight after the double wide falls and squishes all your ponies… 
I’ve heard you’ve got some experience. Why don’t you get right on that? After you’re done stocking up on your crazy that is.
Oh honey, get thee to a BNT pronto! Draw reins are a great way to get your horse’s head down and make him move like a hunter. In fact, if you’re clever, you can disguise them as a standing martingale and use them durin your 4’ hunter class. For a nominal fee, I would be happy to show you how…
Sounds like a good plan getting that baby going! And if you need a catch rider the baby is certainly up for it…but ask Finders as she is in charge for the weekend!
Seriously, if you are bored Sunday you can come visit the real Snap! I would love to meet some of my friends on here!!
I am not grounded! no fair! my momma says that i’m not! 
eggbutt, i think you did have too many smegma coolers because where on earth is southern dakota!?! hahaha. 
fine fine fine. you are right horse_poor, your BNT told you why the shoes must be the wrong size and your BNT is right…fine. fine fine.
she said i was in time out, not grounded…
[sticks tongue out comment has been noted and filed for future reference]
<BLOCKQUOTE class=“ip-ubbcode-quote”><div class=“ip-ubbcode-quote-title”>quote:</div><div class=“ip-ubbcode-quote-content”>Originally posted by horse_poor:
<span class=“ev_code_PURPLE”>In all seriousness…I have a date tomorrow night! 
</span> </div></BLOCKQUOTE>
I’m not sure if you can be apart of our cool club anymore…you are only allowed to date tripods, BNTs, and TV stars. Duh. 
must cut mullets…u are special!
where is everyone? oops. thats right. its the weekend. everyone else has a life. my bad…
well, off to the rodeo in NZ…gotta go get on my lear jet…
Perfect! On my way! Anyone need me to pick up anything along the way? (Haven’t tons of room- those stacked shoes take up a lot of room in my backpack…oh, and then there’s the wine…).
It’s just a spoof on the many threads here that are posted under alters. Nothing really to get, just funny. 
Snap - she’s all yours. I haven’t advertised her heavily, as I do not like to have people come to my property…they always have some comment to make about the rescues. I had one person and their tripod come to see her, but they didn’t like her color…said she was too loud?? well duh, how else are you going to get the judge to see you when you dont have a BNT
The humane society is amazed at my turn around rate, taking these guys in and finding them “new homes” 
I’m being honored at the annual banquet…its a pot luck dinner…im taking resque!
Another vender! I understand LordHelpus is doing a LimeAid/Coon on a Stick stand and Daventry will be selling her teriyaki Gopher Kebobs. In between classes of course.
Here it is - Believe it or not, it is NOT titled the “inverness Problem” - but after 3 years, that is what it is known as (as once again, for the 3,492 time, poor Inverness cringes whilst thinking of herunwanted fame… ).
It’s definitely prom day, cause I woke up with a zit on my chin!
I am still attaching the feathers to my dress, but it should be finished by this evening. It’s inspired by that goose dress Bjork wore to that one awards show. My date has feathers to match.
Speaking of dates, I was unable to score the NASCAR dudes. Sorry ladies. I did, however, run in to a bunch of guys I went to college with, including two seriously hottt basketball players, so I will am going to snag them. As there is approximately 6’8" of each of them, I might share a little. But probably not.
I accidentally left my roadside steaks in my ca last night, so they’ve been there all day. The good news is we won’t have to cook them this evening, so there will be more room in the bbq for rescue.
ps. MCM–I will bring my friend Sean for you, who could be a Ryan clone. Except a hair taller.
Okay ladies, time to go sip a cocktail and do my hair.
FLY? Did you say FLY? Do you need a fly spray recipe?
Congrats Naters!!!
BTW, I REALLY need to know if I should call the vet…
Well kids, I almost there but have run into a problem. I picked up some rescues along the way and strapped them to the top of the trailer as the trailer is full and wouldn’t you know that the load was too tall for one of the underpasses, so we got stuck. We will be on our way as soon as the highway department dislodges us.
Also, I figured out why my camoose was not traveling well-she was evidently giving birth, which irritated me because I lost a lot of travel time stopping and seeing what was going on back there. She had a rough delivery as the little camoose had a hump stuck in the birth canal. I am very excited as my camoose was bred to Camoose K, owned by our very own Jen22, who is the White Trash Dressage Tranter National champion. If anyone is looking for a delightful mount, please speak with Jen22 about her stock on all colors and ages of Camoose”"but this is NOT a sales ad. Her Camoose can jump 10’ from a standstill.
I also got some very exciting news-for those of us with children, I have been informed that Michael Jackson will be on hand to provide daycare free of charge! However, he said he would only look after boys, and no girls.
Also, as a special surprise for the single gals, Scott Peterson will be on hand for several rounds of speed dating-I am told the winner will become involved in a killer of a relationship.
I heard that Jetsmom was busy with her new BNT getting ready for the seminar he will be presenting entitled “Alligator clips and Electricity: Uniting the two.”
I heard that Helen made it to Texas and is slated to go on Judge Judy to sue the maker of her horses artificial leg (on a real note, someone actually did that-one of the best Judge Judy’s I have seen)
I am volunteering to use sidewalk chalk to write the tests on the road so no one will forget them.
I also have another problem-as the cofounder of White Trash Dressage, the members of this elite society have caught wind of this celebration and screamed that it was unfair that they were not invited, and if an invite is not extended, they will crash it. So, I think we should make an executive decision and invite them, especially since we cannot get the USDF or USEF to approve it, and entries might be down due to that. The WTDers do not care about approved shows or not. They just want an excuse to blow of some white trash steam.
oskaar – I actually inject marainade into their skin while they are alive…wait, no I don’t! I don’t want MINE eaten!!! Pick one someone else!!! L
horse_poor – I’m excited to ride in the spagetti junction! Sounds like fun! Can we make the show a surprise and just shut down the freeways at rush hour sometime???
I am hoping to get my new jacket made in time for the show – it is grey plaid with platinum threads going through it. And it is only costing $1M!!!
even Table – What a cutie!!! The “before” looks like my guys “during” picture!! So you can imagine what he looked like when we first got him!!!
<span class=“ev_code_BLUE”>mcm, its good to see you found the color pallet…</span>
<span class=“ev_code_PURPLE”>your roomate is an eiiijiot! duct tape her into a chair, and read your books to her until she likes them</span>
<span class=“ev_code_GREEN”>if you are going to make your roomate sleep with anyone, i suggest a judge, or possibly my new stallion…</span>
even table – But everyone tells me that your “plan” for training me stinks!!! All the other BNT say that I should at least be jumping x’s by now…my friend’s little brother has only been riding 7 years and he’s eventing at Prelim! So I think you may be taking advantage of me…I know you want my horse, but I paid for Flea Bag! You take him to shows but say he’s too green for me to ride and that maybe in a few years he’ll be quiet enough for me. But in a few years, he’ll be 30! I really think we need to sit down and discuss my goals as I think you have been ignoring them. I mean, the only thing you say to me during lessons is “Where’s my check” and “Pass me another smegma cooler.” I just am questioning our professional relationship right now.
Even Table-it is AWESOME!!! I have already cried once and actually gasped out loud, and I am only on Chapter 5!
Eggbutt, that’s not what you said when you came hot-tubbing in my BOSS therapy pool.
Do you think if Oreo extended his tail it would act as enough of an aerial for him to make contact? Perhaps we should email Willem and ask him to check on Oreo?
And why hasn’t Erin shut this down yet? Do you think she’s too busy busting herself laffing at our sorry asses?
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