[QUOTE=catherines;8104843]
It is not uncommon for someone travelling a fair distance to view a potential horse or pony to take a trailer along just in case it’s a fit. [/QUOTE]
That’s an issue. OP thought trailer = 100% getting the pony. Most horse people know that even showing up with a trailer does not entitle you to a pony/horse no matter how ‘perfect’ he/she is for your kids. It’s a smart idea in case it does work out for BOTH parties, but it is not a guarantee.
I’ve never shown up to try a horse with a trailer, but I’ve also never driven 7 hours to try a horse.
I’ve driven 4, but there were 6 for me to try, one of which I liked. I then arranged to have it shipped. Even if I had shown up with a trailer that day, that didn’t mean any one of the owners had to sell/lease me their horse.
[QUOTE=stoicfish;8104870]
Really? I won’t take a trailer unless I know it is a possible sale and it will be my decision to come home without a horse. How many people leave disappointed because the sale is refused by the seller due to unstated details?
Especially after so much correspondence and possibilities for communication.[/QUOTE]
If the pony or horse were a distance away and it sounded through my communications with the seller and say possible videos etc… Then yes I would haul a trailer along just in case … Save making two trips save time and money …I have had people do this and have done it myself it is not uncommon. I ask as did those who came to me if it would be a problem . Never expressed expectation that just because trailer was there it would leave with an equine on board.
Here is my take on this thread (because I do not really see any reason to hate on the OP for bringing up a frustration since that is what a good percentage of the threads here are about):
PO contacted the OP about a pony they had that they are looking for a new home for. OP is relatively new to this horse thing and very exuberant.
PO and OP talk back and forth. Both parties hearing in the conversations (email, verbal, PM) what they think they want to hear.
PO thinks the OP realizes that there is no commitment and heck, everyone is willing to travel that far with their kids to check out a pony that the owner can just say ‘no thanks’ at any time, this is of course known.
OP thinks that with the last minutes communications the pony is theirs to take, so if they spend the money and time to get to the pony there is nothing that should inhibit their ability to drive home with a pony.
Both parties needed to use more words and make their side of the thought process clear.
[QUOTE=UlysMom;8104763]
Completely agree. Bad form.
ETA: Laura, you have to edit your quote too. :D[/QUOTE]
Duh…feeling stupid today. Thanks. Done.
[QUOTE=Frostbitten;8104878]
Just out of curiosity, what’s the longest thread ever on COTH? Are we even close?[/QUOTE]
I think the thread on Wild Eyed N Wicked was around 140 pages. Russian Roulett thread was 101.
Thanks bugsynskeeter. This thing is still in it’s infancy but looking quite robust.
Unless I could somehow also arrange for a horse to be vetted the same day I drive all the way down there, I don’t bring a trailer. The only time I have, I was buying as-is from dealer type places.
Thinking about going to look at a horse about 6 hours away, no way am I going to spend the $$ in gas and tolls to drive my huge rig down there when I could drive my 40+ mpg car in case owner, horse, or both are crazy.
[QUOTE=soloudinhere;8104905]
Unless I could somehow also arrange for a horse to be vetted the same day I drive all the way down there, I don’t bring a trailer. The only time I have, I was buying as-is from dealer type places.
Thinking about going to look at a horse about 6 hours away, no way am I going to spend the $$ in gas and tolls to drive my huge rig down there when I could drive my 40+ mpg car in case owner, horse, or both are crazy.[/QUOTE]
Yup. A baby-sitter and a drive down by only the OP herself would have saved a lot of money, and heartache for the kids.
Ah but this was a “FREE” pony !! Free lease actually … who vets those ? Now the saddle , perhaps if she had known that the saddle would present a problem she could have hauled the saddle fitter along as well … and her current horse’s breeder … In the case of the free lease, free pony … I’d go take a trailer and a suitable rider and tack and hope for the best but expect nada … but that’s me … if I go to a sale with something in mind I haul along the trailer just in case… not really any different … you takes your chances .
And factor this in, if the information I got on my phone is correct: The PO is not a native of the USA. So she speaks from a background of a formal language and not from our slang. I have a lot of friends from that country, so I do know that they don’t talk “our”" american slang. (Even my friends who have been stateside for decades married to americans.) So while everyone is presuming what the PO said, she probably did not know what crazy and pushy american women do when they want a free pony. Being polite and formal in the USA doesn’t pay when you are dealing with someone who wants your pony no matter what you say or do.
Je suis pony owner still. We americans require that everyone assume that they understand that we want what we want and we want it now. (I do not want a burrito, but I will have a frozen marguerite while you guys are eating.)
I wish we did know what happened to Kade in the crayola thread.
Of course this OP on this thread and the one in the crayola thread may both be some old white man in his “wife beater” undershirt and droopy drawers, with a can of PBR and a stogie, sitting at his computer having fun with horse women.:lol:
Someone does need to get that pony!
How people choose to spend their money is not a reliable indicator of what money they have available to spend.
I didn’t want to spend more than $2000 on a saddle for Dani, yet spent considerably more than that on vet bills for Izzy last summer. If someone judged my ability to pay for the CARE of my horses on my posts on what I want to spend on tack, they would be mislead.
Just because my cats have all been free, doesn’t mean they don’t go to the vet, get expensive food, or are otherwise well cared for…it’s just why pay for a cat, when they wander in for free?
If she won’t call a vet for her rescue mare, she won’t call a vet for the pony. Res ipsa.
This thread is like a three headed dragon - you read one page, three new ones pop up! 
[QUOTE=cloudyandcallie;8104979]
If she won’t call a vet for her rescue mare, she won’t call a vet for the pony. Res ipsa.[/QUOTE]
Exactly. She’s written that she needs to save before calling the vet, and that the pony she wanted would not need maintenance.
Anyone else disappointed that we didn’t hear from the rescue mare’s breeder? I would have loved hear her side of the story, since for some reason, she was a part of this ordeal.
[QUOTE=roamingnome;8104995]
Exactly. She’s written that she needs to save before calling the vet, and that the pony she wanted would not need maintenance.
Anyone else disappointed that we didn’t hear from the rescue mare’s breeder? I would have loved hear her side of the story, since for some reason, she was a part of this ordeal.[/QUOTE]
TB Breeder-lady could get this thread on the fast train to “record status”…if she’s a talker.
Get that Tb Breeder lady in here! This thing has legs.
Just wanted to weigh in and say that I figured out who PO was from the various little bits of info provided, and I am an idiot, so if I could figure it out, anyone can! So all of you who want to protect her may want to remove one or more of your bits.
Of course, now that I know who it is, I am quite on PO’s side, for various reasons.
This may not have been said before, I believe VineyRidge alluded to it, but I don’t care how long you talk, text, e-mail, Skype, etc., until you meet someone in person, you can’t really get the feel of their jib, so to speak. I have had some wildly inaccurate impressions of what some COTHER’s were like in real life, until they throw in a bit of their own info from left field, such as “I need to lose 100 lbs.” or “I am over 70, I am so old.” Or invite you to take a look at their profile picture.
(I’m looking at you LadyLexie, you told people to look at your profile pic to check out your hair color, but OMG).
So when OP showed up with the ENTIRE family in tow, and I can totally understand why she did, it may have been overwhelming to PO. And totally threw everything she may have wanted to say out of her head.
Who the heck knows? One of the very first horse people I met told me she was unfit to work around people, that’s why she works with horses.
My last piece of wonderful wisdom goes to the person who speculated that maybe the trailer was a dirty mess and that may have given PO some pause, but with a newly rented for the occasion trailer, I doubt that.
Ok, slinking back to Off Topic to wrangle with the far Righties and lament the absence of Kathy S as a sparring partner!
I love you (not in the creepy way). I hope you get that nap someday. 
The OP’s bailed on us. There’s no way she’ll invite mare breeder to join us. Sad face.
I read the OP’s original post seeking a free pony. It does include some “new to the horse world” comments from her that I would find disquieting were I thinking of offering a horse or pony, even for sale.
But what’s really indicative is that OP got a lot of really good advice from that first post, such as join the local Pony Club (which OP said she had never head of) or network locally herself or through her BM and that finding a good pony takes time and that she’s naïve to expect one for free. As some put it, a good pony is worth its weight in gold and generally get passed among relatives and friends (or Pony Club).
She has ignored it all which shows me she only hears what she wants to hear.
My daughter was 8 and had had weekly lessons for a year BEFORE I started pony hunting. It took months and we went to quite a few places but nothing more than 2 hours away. We never took the trailer the first time. We wound up with a saint of a POA in his 20s who did require ongoing special care and vet visits. Luckily, we had our own place so he could stay even after she outgrew him. I did loan him at a couple of Pony Club rallies but he died with us at 31. That’s the reality of pony shopping,
