You’re likely right.
I’ll then have to consider how I frame my leaving to the many friends I have associated with this barn.
These two sentiment are confusing; sheerly out of curiosity, how does this work?
I’ve not been anywhere with the longevity you have been, but I did find moving 5 barns in 3 years made it obvious who my friend-friends were. I say that not in a snippy way, I have (I sure many of us do) what I call “barn friends” who im friendly with and we watch either others backs kind of thing, but when I’m not boarding at the same barn, keeping up contact usually drops. It’s more of a community thing I think than friends is how I look at it. And I understand that is hard to leave especially when it’s good. I’ve been lucky to have that at all the barns I’ve been at, even the crappy ones.
Your friend-friends will stick through moves!
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Thanks.
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Well, it’s a conundrum.
The BO makes bad decisions and is repeatedly hostile when you point this out. Who knows, you may be on your third strike for irritating the hell out of him by bringing up things he thinks are nitpicking or above your pay grade.
Things like the arena incident don’t just go away.
So you have two choices.
Accept that he will run his barn in ways that don’t really make sense, and that this has already and may in future cause injury to your horse, to you, or to other people. And you can’t educate him without him getting angry. And that you need him more than he needs you.
Or move, either before or after these incidents cause a big fight.
You aren’t going to change him, and he will never say you are correct.
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I totally understand that being a huge factor in your decision making…could you move your horse to the friends barn 3 doors down? It sounds like there are close by options given the nature of the community!
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Validation/dismissive:
Dismissive:
Again:
aaaand again:
I should have known better than to actually comment. But at any rate, at least you’re consistent with the “ask a question and then argue the answers”…
Edit: and the word “peeps” should have also been a flag for me, with a big bright flashing arrow on it. Missed that, too.
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Ha, well, since one of my responses was quoted from another thread and I got sucked into this thread, I gotta comment! (Not sorry, was flattered!)
I agree with the myriad of other posters that the setup is problematic. The girl may not be a horse person, but this could happen even to an experienced person. I’ve ridden at a barn that blanketed and unblanketed in the fields. I think anyone knows that lots can go south with this setup, but it’s done because time and available hands are short, so it’s done out of convenience.
The setup with a hotwire very, very close to the horse, though WHILE the horse is eating ramps up the level of risk–again, even for an experienced horse person.
OP’s horse may or may not be a PIA–personally, I don’t think he necessarily sounds like one. Just because a horse isn’t so dead quiet they can’t be blanketed/unblanketed while eating in a tiny pen near a hotwire without being restrained doesn’t mean they’re a PIA.
But the owners aren’t going to change the routine. From their perspective, one issue isn’t enough to introduce safe blanketing practices, most likely. Some barns do all sorts of questionable things, like let the horses “run” to their stalls from the fields at feeding time, barely have bedding in stalls, muck stalls with horses in them. They do it until something goes wrong, and sometimes they get lucky and nothing does (or people just leave before things do).
If they’re employing non-horsey family to keep the barn running, I’m going to bet they are short of help, like most barns. Especially barns with “rough” setups, where the owners can’t or won’t afford to make things easy to do the work for workers, it’s tough to get people to work for minimum wage (or less). I don’t know what your circumstances are but the comment about not liking the girl’s “energy” with horses–I get what you’re saying, but there is no way to ensure that every employee at a barn is going to be savvy and experienced around horses, especially with so much barn turnover–even if you like the workers when you move in, 6 months now that may change.
I would have a conversation with the BO, if you like it there. “Look, I have reflected, and I overreacted. For your daughter’s safety and my horse’s, it’s probably a good idea if he’s restrained while he’s blanketed.” Don’t make it an issue about the daughter or the barn’s SOPs.
Depending on how hot/cold he runs, you could even ask to only have him blanketed and unblanketed in the stall, and since you’re out there so much, just take care of the changes he might need in the field yourself, restraining him, and tell the owners that.
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I didn’t realize grabbing the link mid thread would keep it mid-thread, like a youtube video. Sorry about that!
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That’s okay, this has been an entertaining read!
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Focus on the message, not the messenger.
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This. My horses have lived in run-in situations for the past 15+ years, so they are not in a stall or on cross ties. When I handle them, I always use a halter and lead rope. If the daughter is not doing that, she and the horses are both at higher risk of something going wrong.
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I wouldn’t say that being friends with the barn owners is a real advantage. Growing up, my mom always made a point of being friends with the barn owners as I think she thought it was an advantage.
As an adult, I can’t think of a barn where I haven’t been a favorite of the barn owners. Part of that is I lived on my own property and then years later worked in barns as a working student/farm sitter, so I try and be a very easy boarder. Although I try never to get too close either.
Because when you’re seen as a “friend” I think it’s even more expected that you won’t be picky and that you won’t complain. So while being friendly can have its advantages, I also think feelings can get offended more easily. Just imo.
I’ve never been asked to leave but I have had to make the decision to leave barns even though I was fond of the owners. It’s a bummer.
OP, I do hope you can smooth over the situation and everybody can stay safe there.
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OP, did they fix the bad footing in the arena that was involved with your horse getting hurt? If not are you still riding in it?
Are they going to move the hot wire away from where they hang his feed bucket? The one that zapped him and caused the blanketing issue?
Whats more important to you here? Barn mates and “friends of convenience” ( meaning you are in the same place often) or the health and safety of your horse? Not to mention safety of other people whoever they may be?
And again, do you have a current, signed boarding contract in place? What does it say about leaving, voluntarily or asked to vacate?
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This is a giant chasm in training despite what all the NH people say. This sort of nitpickery about how to approach a horse is what leads inexperienced people handling “trained” horses to getting hurt. A trained horse doesn’t require a person to have a degree in nitpickery to safely approach them.
Teach the horse to frickin’ stand and behave itself no matter which direction you approach and whatever may be in your hands. Hell, I expect horses I work with to dive their heads into the neck hole of the blanket I ‘come at them’ with.
As to the electric fence in a feeding area, that is complete batshittery. Add in blanketing at feed time and that’s off the charts batshittery.
If you’re bent on staying put, discuss turning the fencer off during blanketing time AND train your horse better.
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I know but no reason she can’t take the young woman aside and show her a better/ safer way by haltering before at least blanketing her horse ?
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She mentioned they had a chat about what happened which is good. If that is not what the “standard” practice there is though, high risk for ruffling parental feather trying to take the kid aside to tell her how it should be done better. Especially since it’s the BO’s kid vs a non related staff member.
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I have just read the whole thread and I see there is a lot going on besides blanketing a loose horse beside the hot wire.
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The OP answered this in two different places.
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The daughter is very, very lucky she was not hurt. Hot wire and handling a horse by it is a recipe for a hospital visit. A BNT in my area was sent to the hospital with severe internal injuries when her Grand Prix horse touched the hot wire and slammed into her while she was handling him. She is lucky to be alive and took a long time to recover so she could ride at her previous level.
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There is no such thing as a bombproof horse. If a person thinks their extremely well trained horse could never hurt them, they may find out the hard way that is a false belief. Good/excellent training reduces the risk, but the risk is always there.
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